


Andromeda

by Fuffywumple



Category: Life Is Strange (Video Game)
Genre: AU, Because it's Chloe, F/F, Mild Drug Usage, Mild underage drinking, Some Marshfield, Strong Language, amberprice
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-13
Updated: 2019-02-13
Packaged: 2019-03-22 04:56:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 62,056
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13756779
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fuffywumple/pseuds/Fuffywumple
Summary: Rachel Amber is a small town girl chasing her dreams,Chloe Price is a big city drop out.Some would say, they were never meant to cross paths. Others, say that opposites attract.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey everyone! This is my Amberprice LA AU, I've been working on it since October, and now I'm here to post it in full. Enjoy!

I fucking hated January. It's always 'the New Year!' where everyone is either mourning Christmas, making resolutions that will never stay strong past May, or both. It's also one of the busiest months of the year. I really shouldn't hate the fact that work is more busy, since I do more work, and thus get paid more. But I'm going to complain anyway. As I wiped gross yolk smeared across one of the diner tables, the smell of salty ocean sea waves into the small diner in which I work.

Los Angeles was a grueling city. Full of rich aristocrats, and actors, and generally famous people who think they're better than other people. Most knew the city as a perfect place, 'The Big City' where dreams come true and everyone drives a Ferrari. But news flash, people. It's not so perfect, nothing is. 

And I would have been someone to talk to, I worked in a shitty diner on the edge of the Santa Monica beach.

Not gonna lie, I hated working in a shitty diner, but the view of the Santa Monica beach is unbeatable. If it weren't for the view of the sun setting while I closed up the diner, I probably wouldn't work here. Accept I needed the cash. "Chloe!" The sound of my name jerked my hand, knocking over the salt shaker with my clumsiness. Beau, the boss man of the diner stood behind the counter to the kitchen. "Finish with the table." He commanded, "we have other customers to serve."

I've known Beau since I started working here. He caught me trying to smuggle a large amount of muffins and almost laid down the law. Before he saw how my ribs had been poking out from my chest. He thought I was a homeless, and he technically wasn't wrong. I mean I own a house, but I didn't have a home, not anymore. So he gave me the job, just to mercy me. He may be the Big Bad Boss. But he did save my ass, I do owe him for that.

I swore that man's face is broken, I'd only seen him with one expression, a frown, with narrow eyes. He may look like an asshole, but he's a little less of a guard dog as he seems. I cleaned the spilled salt from the table and scooted back behind the counter. Beau stood with his arms crossed in front of his chest, his muscles are ridiculously large for a man who is 45 years old. "Come on, B." I smiled, slowly checking my shoulder into his. "If you keep frowning like that, you'll wrinkle your face." Beau sighed, "please get to work, Price." He rubbed his forehead, "I don't want to have to punish you." Beau seemed overly stressed, It unnerved me, I tried to lighten the mood. "But you don't have to punish me." I responded, a coy smile playing on my lips. Beau was unfazed

"Nathan is pulling all the weight around here, Chloe." He points towards a booth. Nathan Prescott stood at that booth, furiously writing down a loud family's order. I sigh. It isn't like Nathan is a bad person, necessarily. He just works too hard. He's always trying to prove that he's better than his criticisms. He just gives too many fucks. And he's rich as fuck. He owns a damn Lamborghini, I wanted to spit on it as much as I wanted to drive it. "Yeah, yeah." I sighed back at Beau, who started to mess with the cash register. Why did Prescott work here anyway? He already had all the cash he wanted. He was such a spoiled kid that he didn't need this job. His parents were making enough so that he wouldn't have ever needed a job.

"Get to work Chloe, don't make me take away paid overtime, again." Beau muttered sadly, like it was more his job to say it, rather than what he actually wanted. Shutting the cash register with a little more force that I would have suggested. The damn thing looked like it was about to fall apart. The cash register too. I pushed open the gate to the kitchen counter, and walked out into the rest of the diner. The entire room buzzed with conversation. My head was already pounding, the constant conversation of the room didn't make it any better.

"Chloe." Nathan gasped as he walked past me. "What did you do to your hair?" I smiled, touching the blue tips of hair that brushed my jaw. "What, this?" I twirled the dyed tips and the strawberry blonde locks above them around my finger. "It's nothing..." 

"Nothing? You changed the color of your hair." His voice was somehow surprised, as if I wasn't the type of person who would dye their hair. "You should try it sometime." I teased, moving past him and further into the diner. I stepped to a table with two teenagers in it, they were probably not much younger than me, probably 17 or 16. But they were definitely more... make-out ish. They were stuck in a lip lock, sucking each other's faces while the guy not-so-subtly gripped the girl's ass. I wanted to vomit. Instead I cleared my throat to divide them.

The boy pulled back with a groan, and turned to glare at me with a grumpy, "yeah?" He looked greasy, ratty red strands of hair was tied into a bun behind his head, acne breakouts all over his face. "What'll you be having today?" I asked, begrudgingly. The couple sighed and grumbled out an order. Gotta fucking love my job. I gave the order back to the kitchen and did my rounds again.

I allowed the smell of the ocean to calm me down as I stepped out onto the sand for my break. I felt the vice that clamped around my forehead from being in that room weaken as I sucked in the sweet sweet tobacco that filled my lungs. The sun warmed my skin as the cool breeze bit into my cheeks. The only reason I actually liked January was because of how cold it got, the cold always managed to make me feel better. Well, so did booze and weed. But that wasn't important. I stared up at the LA sun as it burned holes into my eyes, I didn't mind, I liked the pain. Except I actually didn't, I squeezed my eyes against the harsh light, and allowed the rays of sun to help heat my face.

I pulled more toxic smoke into lungs as I listened to the default LA background noise, cars buzzing by, half taxis, the other big, loud sports cars roaring down the road. People are chatting as they walk down the beach, or on the sidewalks. The January breeze rustles the palm trees, creating a woosh sound that, when accompanied by the splashing of the waves made all the nerves in my body relax for a second, only a second. I enjoyed more of my cancer inducing cigarette as I looked across the stretch of beach right in front of my nose. The smoke from my cigarette danced in the morning sunlight, before it was blown away from the wind that sent a jolt down my spine. I continued to listen to the world of LA buzz around me, the world carried on like I wasn't there. Like it always did.

A few seagulls made annoying scratchy sounds in the distance, I watched them fight over something that resembled a bagel. It was actually amusing to watch, I puffed on my cigarette and watched the Battle Royale take place. The two pecked and nibbled, scrambling for the small bit of bagel left on the ground. The amount of prize was barely worth the fight really, it was a pathetic amount of bagel. But oh well, I guess. As I stomped on the end of my smoked through cigarette, I watched as a crow swooped in between the fighting seagulls and snatched the piece of bagel, taking off before the others had a chance to react. They didn't bother to follow, they knew they would have been out strengthened. They had to face that their bagel was gone. I knew how they felt.

I slipped back into the diner as my break came to a close. I put on that ridiculous fucking apron and grabbed the coffee pot from the kitchen, cursing to myself as I put on a smile under Beau's watchful eye. He softened at that, and returned to giving orders in the kitchen. Pouring coffee was... uneventful, I guess? Look. I didn't know what else to say about it. That's all my damn day was. Wake up, masturbate, go to work, pour coffee, take orders, go back to my house, masturbate, sleep. That was the daily routine, in and out, rinse and repeat.

"Hey- you're spilling." A voice interrupted my haze. I jumped out of my own mind to see that, indeed, I had poured way past the lip of the mug, and coffee started to spill onto the table. "Shit." I mumbled, grabbing a rag from my apron pocket (By far the best damn thing about that apron) and wiped up the spilled coffee, which made the rag really hot to the touch, I played it off like it was nothing, but it hurt like a bitch. "Are you okay?" The girl who I just made a fool of myself to asked, and her question was only like 30 percent pity, incredible.

I looked up at her and immediately regretted it. She looked back with soft hazel pupils, eyes that cared for everything they set themselves upon. Her halo of blonde hair almost blinded me as the sun reflected off them, the girl's pink lips curled effortlessly into a smile. Something about it made my knees weak. So I continued to stare, like an asshole. I didn't know what else to do. The girl let out a soft chuckle. "Hello?" She asked, her voice filled with amusement, I felt mesmerized by it.

"Hey, you okay, really?" She asked again. I immediately snapped myself back into Chloe Price mode. "Huh?" I muttered quietly, wiping up non existent coffee from the table. "I asked if you were okay." The girl's voice was laced with laughter. I bobbed my head up and down in a half assed was to show I was okay. She smiled again, and something caught my eye. It was an earring, feathered. The primary earring was a light blue color, it nearly brushed her shoulder, while the other pieces of feather were merely its backup decoration. The dangling feathers swung from her left ear. She only had one, where had the other gone?

I had been mesmerized by this girl and her earring I didn't notice she was talking again. "You look a little high there. You smoking any?" A playful smirk unfurls on her face. "What?" I asked, staring at her in pure astoundment. Did this girl just ask if I was high? "I'm not... No." I answered, maybe harsher than I intended. But the girl continued to smile at me, it was a coy smile, as if she meant more from it than I anticipated. She laughed, a gentle, silky sound that made me lightheaded. I took a deep breath. Inhaling through my nose and caught a whiff of The Girl.

She smelled like... Jasmine? a smell I didn't normally like. But damn, I couldn't help but love the scent as it came off of her. I caught myself staring like an asshole and blinked several times to right myself. Jesus, what was wrong with me? This was new to me, a feeling of utter panic like this. Every guy I'd ever met, dated, had sex with. None of them made me feel so lopsided and light. I felt elated. I poured more coffee into her mug, eyeing it this time to be aware that I didn't make a fool of myself more times than necessary,

I needed to snap out of it. I snatched my notebook from my apron. "What'll you be having?" I asked tapping the pencil against the pages to resist staring at how impossibly pink her lips are. God, what the hell was wrong with me? "Can I have another minute?" She asked, idly moving her finger around the lip of the coffee mug. It caught my attention for a brief moment. "Sure thing." I responded, my voice cracking like it hadn't since I was 12.

I stepped away from the table and went right into the kitchen. What the fuck was that? I was a damn blubbering mess. What was it about that girl that just made me fall apart like that? I dragged the heels of my palms against my eyes. I needed a serious timeout, splash water on my face and not look like a total loser. I eyed Beau and the washroom, he gave me a gentle look that meant 'make it quick' and I pushed open the door.

This is the only time I was glad that the bathrooms were single stalled. I slid the door lock into place and stepped to the sink, placing my hands on the cool-and also grimey-porcelain sink. I ducked my head, heaving a heavy sigh, I pursed my lips then whispered, 'way to go, dumbass.' 

After a couple seconds to cool down. I flicked on the tap and let water slowly fall down into the drain. What the hell was wrong with me? I acted like a fucking moron to that girl, stumbling and fumbling like a dumbass. there was something about that girl. The way that the sun shone on her, highlighting her under a spotlight. Or maybe it was that secretive, mischievous glare in her deep hazel irises. The smirk on her glossy pink lips. 

I used my hand as a scoop and splashed a tremendous amount of water on my face. Wincing as some shot up my nose. I stared at my rippled reflection in the old glass as water dripped down my face. What were these feelings? Was it romantic feelings? Towards a girl? I've never felt that before, not to anyone that didn't have a penis, anyway. The idea swirled in my gut and scared me, I had to force my mind away from it.  I watched my own reflection. My contorted eyes stared back, they looked tired red with over exhaustion. That about summed my life up.

Living in what the government called a 'Low Income Neighborhood'-which wasn't a great name, but what else was there to call it? Some called it the Ghetto. Others "the hood" (which is a ridiculous fucking name to call a place where human beings live, if you ask me)-was like a constant job. Electricity was weak, expensive, and blew easily. So I always had to find a way to refrigerate whatever food I could manage to buy, with the low end job that all Low Income residents had. Not everyone can have a career as a model or an actress. There has to be some people who run your coffee shops, or gas stations. Or else no one will.

I sighed at the pathetic reflection I was staring at, my skin was almost sheet white from all the work I had been putting in. Overtime hours, working until or even after close. The purple lumps of skin under my eyes was a reminder of how little sleep I got these days. That was because I hated to sleep, every time I did, I would be awoken mid night, all by myself. I would lay awake, cursing my father for dying, cursing my mother for running away under the pressure. Curse myself for being alone.

I pressed a piece of paper towel to my face. At least this job had a few perks... I got paid, which was important to, you know, live. I also convinced Beau to let me take home any stale muffins, or food that wasn't being eaten. It served my dinner most days. And, this job also had given me friends, people who I could rely on, and go to for support. Well, if I trusted anyone, that is. But my trust levels were running low these days.

Pushing the door open, I slowly shuffled out of the bathroom. The stank of toilets was quickly replaced by the sweet smell of baking food and the salty ocean. I grabbed my notebook and walked back into the main diner area. The girl was still there, sat beside the window. She held her mug up, steam spilling from the still hot coffee, it swirled upwards and caressed her cheek as she stared out the window. I felt my stomach clench as I made my way towards her.

I took a few breaths, I was not going to repeat what had happened earlier, maybe it was my weird daydream, or the way she spoke to me, but I wouldn't embarrass myself in from of anyone ever again. "Have you made up your mind?" I asked. The girl turned slowly to face me, deep hazel eyes full of excitement, though I wasn't sure why. Nothing is more boring than eating decent food at a mediocre diner. She pursed her lips before nodding. "Bacon and eggs?" She said uneasily, with a question mark at the end.

It had been a little late for bacon and eggs, many people shuffled in and out for the Lunch rush. But I just dashed the order down on my notepad. "Anything else?" I added, too scared to look at her and embarrass myself even further today. But of course, I looked up at her. She stared at the menu in her hands and flicked her tongue across her lips in concentration, causing an involuntary shiver to course down my back. She shook her head. "No thanks," she smiled, and my heart had a hard time trying to regain pace.

I pivoted and stepped away before I could do any harm. To my ego, I mean. I slipped behind the counter and poked my head into the kitchen. "Bacon and eggs, plain!" I called, to any of the 3 chefs that was open or cared to take an order. I shivered slightly as a breeze shot through the kitchen, the kitchen door was opened. "Chloe!" A voice had shouted at me, and I knew who it was.

I turned to see my favorite hipster nerd standing in the doorway, her camera bag was slung across her shoulder, and her cheeks were pink from the January chill. "Max." I replied with fervor, allowing her to pull me into a hug. Her arms felt so reassuring and warm around me, I wrapped mine own around her and pulled her in closer to me. Max had been on vacation to see her sick mother in Seattle, I hadn't seen her in s couple weeks. And damn it was good to have her back, she felt so warm around me that I didn't want to let her go, but eventually we both pulled back.

"I got in this morning, but I couldn't wait to get back and see you again." She smiled warmly, and I felt warm inside. Max always knew how to make me feel happy. She co-owned the diner with Beau, she had been there when Beau caught me stealing, and convinced Beau to give me the job. Max felt more like a mother to me-which was funny, since I was older than her, but she always acted like an adult-than a friend, the fact that she was only 18 and running a diner maybe fed to that illusion. "Thanks," I smiled at her, relieved to finally have someone to share this diner with. Other than Prescott, who was putting on his apron after taking a smoke break outside.

"How was your mother?" I asked, while Max hooked up her bag and readied her chefs uniform,(Oh, yeah, she's also a chef here too) "She's doing... better." She sighed absently while pulling on the plain white uniform. "That's great to hear, Max." I replied thoughtfully. Watching, out of the corner of my eyes, as one of the chefs brought out the plate of bacon and eggs I had put in for The Girl. Max stopped dead in her tracks to stare at me, her eyes small scanners as she gave me an X-Ray scan. "Have you been sleeping well?" She asked, grabbing a hair tie from her pocket. I didn't want to answer. So I didn't.

Max crossed her arms disapprovingly. "Chloe, you need to start sleeping more." She chastised, head tilted slightly to the side. "I know, I know." I sighed, putting my arms up in defense. "I'm trying Max, I am." Max looked at me with a wavering expression. "I worry for you, Chloe." I sighed at the floor. I know she cared, she always had. About me, about everyone. But I didn't need anyone else involved in my shit. "Thanks." I responded. Not sure what else to say to that. Max opened her mouth. But then must have reconsidered, she sealed her lips. I heard the clanging of silverware and small hum of chatting people and remembered that I kind of had a job I was supposed to be working, whether I liked it or not.

"Gotta get working. Catch you on the flip side, Mad Max." I slipped in her nickname to make it sound less... I didn't know, cold? Max nodded, silent as she started up one of the kitchen stoves. I frowned as I stepped out of the kitchen. I felt like I could more easily breathe in the open air of the diner, the steam and smoke of cooking food thinned out. But yet, I felt out of breath. As I made my way deeper into the diner, I noticed that the table nearest the corner of the room was empty. That Girl was gone.

There was nothing left at her table, but a twenty dollar bill and a small post-it note, with the most beautiful handwriting I've seen.

Thanks for the meal, I'll be back soon. 

XO RA XO


	2. Chapter 2

"So, Chloe Price." Dr. Jefferson eased back into his chair. Notebook open and ready to document my nut ball behaviors. "Have you had any of your... dreams lately?" He asked. That question came up every goddamn week, and every time the answer was the same. "Yeah." I sighed. Did he expect a different answer? He got the same one every week I'm surprised he didn't just lead off with, 'so, Chloe. Tell me about your nightmares.'

"Could you describe it for me?" He asked, flicking his pencil to the notepad paper, ready for my words. I almost snapped at him. Told him he'd heard the story over and over again, a hundred and twenty-fifth time wasn't important-and yes, I had been counting how many therapy sessions we had together, how else was I supposed to document how crazy I was?-but I held my tongue, I didn't need him writing to my boss about behavioral issues... again.

I pulled myself together, a deep inhalation in through my mouth. "I was with dad, again." Just saying it brought flurries of memories to my brain. I didn't like reminding myself of these memories, my nightmares were something I liked to keep in bed. I knew it was unhealthy to keep my memories and thoughts bottled away until I couldn't handle them anymore, but I did it anyway. Going insane from tightly bottled up memories never being shared will always be better than reliving them every day, in my opinion. "We were in his car, me in the back." I recounted, the atmosphere of his clear car rippling around me, demanding to be real. But not quite there.

"He acted as if I wasn't there. Singing that damn country song that he loved to listen to." The lyrics were engraved into my mind. Burnin' the Midnight Oil Again... I shivered visibly, but hopefully not visible enough that Jefferson saw it. Jefferson raised his eyebrow at me, he definitely saw it. I was already done telling this story, did I have to keep going? Something in Dr. Jefferson's expression told me yes, I did have to keep going.

"I wasn't wearing my clothes, not my normal ones at least. I was wearing the same clothes I had on the day... The day dad..." I couldn't bring myself to finish the sentence. The thought was so surreal my stomach clenched, the illusion of dad's car ripped around my eyes again. Stronger this time. It forced a rippling pain on my temples. "The day your father died." Jefferson finished for me, scribbling some notes into the notebook.

I released a breath I didn't know I was holding, it felt better that I didn't have to say it, admittedly. The only thing to come from these sessions, I sat back in my chair and nodded. Jefferson sat forward in his chair, antagonizing my movements. I braced myself for the barrage of questions coming my way. The number one thing I hated about these sessions was the dump of questions I got. But I took it, I always answered them, I swallowed my pain and answered the questions for one reason. Max.

I was only at these sessions because they're mandated by my job. I didn't have the money for therapy, I went untreated for my mental problems for years. Until Max and Beau saw how really fucked up I was, so they gave me therapy. I picked at the hem of my shirt as my eyes danced around this office room. They pushed me into these sessions, when I was already broken and scarred, beyond belief. But I saw how hard Max was trying, how this girl found my stupid ass off the street and tried so hard to fix me, put me back together. It was jarring, no one since my dad had ever tried with me. I was a misfit kid, a delinquent, a broken girl from a broken home. But Max saw something in me, something that no one else did. So I guess I owed it to her.

"Why do you think it's this specific dream that you have?" He asks, pencil drumming on his paper. The question caught me off guard. Of the many times I've recounted that nightmare, he never asked that question. It was always stupid shit, like how it made me feel or my opinions on how nightmarish my dad was, sitting in the front seat of that devil car.

It took me some time to recover, so I could actually have an answer to the question he asked. Why that dream? Maybe because my mind is warped about the most important person in my life getting splattered by a fucking semi truck? Or maybe because my mom couldn't handle the stress of raising a kid on her own after her husband died, so she ditched me when I was a kid to fend for myself. That I had to run away to the 'low-income area' after I got evicted from my Beverly Hills home. "Chloe?" Jefferson asks. I realized I was spaced out like an idiot.

"Right. Right." I responded, rubbing the back of my neck out of pure subconscious habit. "Why do I have my weird, fucked up dreams...?" I posed the question for sarcasm, which made Dr. Jefferson shuffle in his seat, he was anticipating me to bitch him out. I knew the look he had on his face, but I had to refrain. I complied, because Max would bitch me out. "Because I miss him." I said quietly, with more feeling than I anticipated. "I miss going out and getting ice cream. Or seeing movies, or him helping with my school projects late at night. Or how he treated me like an equal? That he was the perfect dad?" My eyes began to water, my voice wavered. I took a deep breath. Those were all valid reasons as to why, but I knew the key reason that I was in that car with my dad in those dreams.

"Because I blame myself for him being in that car." I folded my hands in my lap. The truth stung my heart, it burned in my lungs and spread to every inch of my body. It was something I had never told anyone in my life. Because it was true. "Every single day. I remember that it was my fault that he was in that damn car." It hurt. Being so open to someone. But yet it felt so good. I always hated being honest and open to people, just the idea of it felt mushy and shit. But now that I had started to say these things, it was like the physical weight of all these confessions poured out of me. I felt lighter, and felt more free. I sighed with my entire diaphragm.

Jefferson cocked his head to the side, he seemed just as surprised as I was that I had actually been complying with him, for once. "Why would you blame yourself?" He asked, as if he didn't actually know the answer to that question. He did, I knew he did. But it was kinda his job to ask me, anyway. "Because I was scared." I forced out the words like vomit. "Him and mom were out at some sort of party, and I was home by myself. I thought I heard something in the house so I called him in a panic." My breaths had become wavered as the room around me began to melt into an illusion of my old home. I tried to forcefully rip the thoughts out of my head and stomp on them.

"So he said he would be right home. But I kept waiting, and waiting..." I trailed off, because I didn't want to say my thoughts out loud. I didn't want to verbally admit that I was still waiting for him to come home. For him to go upstairs and to tell me that the noises I was hearing were just the scraping of branches of my bedroom window. To pull me in and hold me tight. I was still waiting, for someone who would never come home.

That's when my life went lopsided. My mom became unfocused and improper, causing her to lose her job. Then she became angry, at her boss for firing her, at me for killing her husband. Eventually she couldn't take it much anymore and left. Straight up packed her shit and left overnight. With no regard for me and how I would survive on my own. Hell if I knew if she was even alive. The memory of waking up the next morning, to find my mother gone. Realizing I was all alone.

I pulled my nails out of my skin, I hadn't realize that they were tearing into my flesh. I was lost in my own thoughts again, that's what therapy did to me. Goddamn I hated therapy. But I did it anyway. Dr. Jefferson had a different look on his face now. It was... something I had never recognized before, some sort of new emotion I had never seen. I guess today was new for the both of us. Jefferson set his notebook aside and pulled off his white glasses to clean off the lenses. "That was a little bit of a heavy talk, we should probably bring it down and regain ourselves." He stated, wiping the hem of his shirt on the lenses of his glasses to clear them.

"Yeah." I huffed out in agreement, sitting back in the comfy ass chair that therapists offices always have. "I'd love a chill break." Out of instinct, I almost reached for a blunt. I kept them in my back pocket, encase I ever needed a 'chill break.' But if I whipped that bad boy out here. I'd never hear the end of it.

"I understand that you are here from your job." Jefferson reminded me, as if I needed a reminder that I was too poor for these therapy sessions. "Tell me, how has the job been going recently?" Now, that was a tougher question than I anticipated. How was my job going? I mean, I had to deal with Nathan Prescott all day. That little prick. Okay, maybe he was horrible, outright. That kid was more passive-aggressive with his anger. When I had first gotten my job. He rebelled against it, said that someone like me shouldn't work there. Asshole. But I was given the job anyway, because it was apparent that Max loved me more than him. Heh, take that, Prescott. But he did seem to calm down a little bit after my initial employment, he mellowed out and he's not a terrible dude... I guess...

Or did he want me to talk about how this low end job is barely keeping my head above water? I'm paid a little over minimum wage so I have to fight to keep myself alive, I do monthly grocery runs, rather than weekly, rarely using electricity or water, I spend most of the time at my house sitting around in the dark, smoking up or just doing nothing. Or maybe he wanted me to admit that half of my earnings goes to buying drugs-My dealer and I were kind of understanding of each other, so I had discounts-and poor life choices.

There's a chance he wanted me to just talk about the grind at work, rather than bitch about my life. Yeah, maybe it was that one. "Work is," I couldn't find the right adjective for what work was, really. "Work, I guess?" I sighed out. "Work is the same old same old. I serve people coffee, ask them what they want to eat, then serve them that too." Yeah my work was shit, but it kept my ungrateful ass alive. I should be appreciative of at least that.

Working 9-5 in a cafe like that was calming in some ways, the quiet music, fuzzing through half broken speakers. Wandering around a diner with faces of people I didn't know and would soon forget.

Except for That Girl.

She still stuck in my mind, even after that day. Bright hazel eyes, mischievous curled lips, and that feather that dangled from her ear. She wouldn't leave my head the rest of that day, even as I slept in bed last night, there she was. In my dreams, waiting and hopeful. What was it about that made my heart beat faster, made the nape of my neck sweat, and my hands fidget in my lap? Something about that mystery girl was enticing, and it scared me how much I wanted to unravel her mysteries. But a pained part inside me reminded me how I would probably never see her again.

The expression on Dr. Jefferson's face lit up, he was suddenly surprised and hopeful. "I can tell you want to say something." He commented, barely straining the glee in his voice, "go on." I sat confused for a moment, why the hell was this guy so happy? Did his wife promise a blowjob when he got home, or did he just win the lottery? Then I remembered that since these sessions started, I really didn't like to open up much. I told him what he needed to know, end of story. But now he may assume that I'm 'opening up' to him. Ugh.

But if I didn't talk about That Girl, I would go crazy. And there was someone right here. Better than nothing I guess. I sighed in defeat.

"It was yesterday. There was someone at the cafe. She was new, someone I had never seen before." I admitted, remembering the way that girl smelled like jasmine. "She was special. And I don't... I don't..." Jefferson scribbled down what I said anxiously. "Keep going, keep going." He encouraged, his eyes intent on me. I suddenly didn't want to be sitting there. But I already dug myself a hole, I couldn't get myself out now.

"She was, special." I repeated. "Unlike anyone I had ever seen. She caught your eye and didn't let you go." I sighed. Something about her was enticing, my stomach did back flips just thinking about her again. I was suddenly aware of how sweaty my palms were, I wiped them on my jeans as my mind swam.

RA, those were the initials that she had left on that note. I was assuming they were hers? But what would that make her name? Ruth Aberdeen, Riley Avery? There were so many combinations for her name that I would never figure her out. I just knew her as RA. I continued to fidget as I grasped at any sense of reality in me. Jefferson watched the movement before he spoke again. "What was so special about her? And what does she make you feel?" I felt rushed with the double back to back questions, but our time was running out. 10 minutes and 39 seconds.

What was it about her that made me feel like this? And what the hell was this feeling anyway? It felt nervousness. But why was I nervous, she was just a girl. I've looked at plenty of girls before in my life. I see one every day, but yesterday was different. It was that girl that made me feel nervous, why? "I'm asking as many questions as you, doc." I respond in defeat. I just couldn't figure out what it was about her. She was an everlasting enigma, and I had only spoken to her for 10 minutes.

"I've barely known this girl. Just 10 minutes did I actually speak to her. But damn, I couldn't get her out of my head all of last night, and even today." I stared at my lap intensely, as if the ghost of my vagina was staring back at me. "What's wrong with me?" For several moments I couldn't move, mortified. Something was wrong with me, I was sure of it. Jefferson didn't speak. He knew I was right, didn't he? I slowly looked up at him while keeping my head immobile.

He gave me a knowing look. "Can you describe what you feel when you think of this girl, Chloe?" There was no mockery, no laughing, he was waiting for a serious answer, he wasn't actually laughing at me. Ha, of course he isn't Chloe. He is a trained therapist. He only mocks you in his head.

I brushed my own consciousness off and shuffled uncertainty in my seat. What did this girl make me feel? "My-my heart. It beats a lot faster. I noticed that." I sputter out, my mind caught on how the blue of her feather brushed her shoulder ever so smoothly. Goddamn, I had to cut it the hell out. "And I felt nauseous. Happy?" I spat out quickly.

"Thrilled." Jefferson replied, a happy smile on his face as his pencil scribbled away. He chewed the inside of his cheek as he reviewed what he had written about me. I sat quietly and let him. This guy is a trained professional right? He should know why I feel so weird about this. My eyes scanned the room around me for a brief moment, anxiety making my fingers subconsciously finger the arms of the chair with my claw like fingernails.

"I think I've got your number." Dr. Jefferson finally spoke, flicking his eyes over the notepad once more. "These feelings you exhibit are not uncommon for someone who feels intimidated-" No, not that one for sure. There was something jarring about this girl's presence for sure, but it wasn't intimidation I was feeling. "Social Anxiety-" Weren't those two the same damn thing? It wasn't Social Anxiety, because, while I didn't like talking to many people. It wasn't because I was scared, it was because I really didn't care about other people. "Or you feel a sexual attraction to her."

I flinched in my chair. Sexual attraction? No fucking way. I've had my share of dating-and even having flings with-guys. No way in hell would this girl come up and just shake up my sexual orientation like that. "I'm straight, doc." I clarified for him, with a little more edge than I may have wanted to, but that didn't matter. "So no, I don't have any feelings for this girl."

His expression didn't change, he only wore a more amused one. "You never know, Chloe." He said knowingly, "things can change. When the right people come along..." He didn't finish. Because he knew that I knew where he was going. I sat forward in my chair, muscles tight with anger. Why did that fucker have the right to control me and the ways I felt? He couldn't just tell me I wasn't straight then bam, I wasn't straight. "Fuck off, okay? I'm straight and you can't fucking walk into my life and tell me I'm not." I tilted my head to the side, feeling a small crack while I stare him down. Jefferson's look changed to one of disappointment. "Yes Chloe, I didn't mean to-" He was cut off by the alarm on his desk going off. The session was finally finished.

Awesome. I stood sharply from my chair. "Great session, next week?" I said quickly, grabbing my jacket from the chair and slinging it onto my back. Jefferson sighed heavily, pushing his glasses further up his nose. There's somewhere else I wish he shove them up.

"Yes. I will see you next week, Chloe." He sounded like he did after every session I had ever had with him. Lost and confused, like he knew I was a lost cause. But he tried anyway. Too bad for him. I guess, because I was the ultimate lost cause. I left the room without turning back.

I don't know what hit me first when I left the building. The beating sun, or freezing January breeze. I didn't care which, I welcomed both. The therapist's office was right in the coast of the beach, close to my work. So I closed my eyes and let the sound of the ocean calm down my raging nerves. I didn't like to admit how often I did things like that, let nature calm me down. Because that was a hipster thing to do. And being a hipster was Max's job. I was the asshole that bugged her about it all the time.

My shoes made me stand unevenly in the sand, so I slipped them off, and shoved my socks inside. Digging my toes into the sand was an incredibly liberating feeling. It massaged the cramps that built in the soles of my feet from walking to the therapist’s office from my house down in Low-Income. I rolled my ankles and allowed the sand to massage my sore feet.

A cough rose in my throat and forced its way out. Damn smoker's lungs, I'm always coughing and wheezing. I should probably have cut down on my smoking habits before I got lung cancer, or something.

I sighed with my entire diaphragm, squeezing all the toxic air out of my lungs before sucking fresh ocean air, which tasted like salt and freedom-ugh, more hippie bullshit that Max would just love. First thing I had to do was head over to the cafe and work until closing, again. At least Max was back from her vacation, so I didn't kill myself with boredom. I looked at the bright blue of the ocean as I remembered my first day working on the job, I had been so excited to actually have a job, making a earning so that maybe, maybe soon I could build my life back up from where it lay shattered on the ground.

Max had been watching me like a hawk. Almost leaning over my shoulder constantly. I first thought it was because she was co manager, so she wanted to make sure that her new employee was working properly. But Max's bright smile and encouragement whenever I properly took someone's order, or was polite to a customer, made me think otherwise. Max had been the closest thing to a parental figure since my own parents couldn't be, ever since the day her and Beau caught me stealing from them.

The backstory between Max and I was a rich one. She and her uncle (Beau) Caught a hungry and damn near homeless thief (me) snatching stale bagels from the dumpster behind the cafe. I was ready for them to punish me, or cut off my damn hand, something like that. But Max acted as if I was a stray puppy. 'Awe, can we keep it?' To Beau until he decided that giving me a job would keep me from digging around in his garbage again.

Max had been thrilled with the idea of recruiting me. For some reason, she just instantly liked me. She was always acting way grown up for her age. She saw me as a younger sibling-yet I was older than her-and tried to raise me. She was always such a warm and gentle person, the complete opposite of my destructive and angry personality. I owed my life to her, and if it was ever needed, I would take a damn bullet for her.

Max has grown from my boss to my mother to my friend, and now to my best friend. There is no one's judgement I value more than hers, besides mine. Of course. My feet stamped into the sand as I walked towards the cafe. I could see it from where I was, and I could smell the pier even further down the way. Funnel cakes and run rides, that was the smell that came from the pier. Smells of cherished memories that had died. Dad used to take me to the pier at the time, weekends mostly. We would get cotton candy and go on the rides, then watch the moon shine on the waves at the end of the night.

The memories stung me physically. I sighed and shoved my hands in my pockets, the cold wind began to make them numb. As I neared the cafe, I shoved my shoes back on my feet. The skin on my soles protesting at the shoes rubbing against it. Someone stood at the front of the cafe, blonde hair blowing freely in the January wind. There was familiar about the persons form. When I came closer I saw it was a girl, her body skinny and... frail, almost. "Hey." I said quietly, but loud enough for the girl to hear me. She turned to look at me. It was That Girl.

Heart skipped a beat and I stopped dead in my tracks. She stood silently, a smart smirk on her face. Earring dangling on her ear. "Hey." She responded, a smile on her face. "You're the girl from yesterday?" She tilted her head just barely. A teasing gesture. All I could do is nod. She took a step towards me, then another. "I remember how out of it you were yesterday. I came back to make sure you were okay. That you made it to today."

I gave a short sharp laugh. "Yeah, yeah. I'm still alive." I grabbed my jacket and pulled at it to prove myself. The Girl smiled at the movement. "Awesome." Her voice was so full of happiness and hope that it caught me off guard. Why would anyone in this town be happy?-besides Max, who somehow seemed to be happy no matter what. The girl had an impish look on her face, head bowed playfully. "Come with me." She smiled.

I sputtered. "C-Come with you?" Was this girl insane? I met her a day ago, I couldn't just sneak off away with her just the day after. She could be some kind of serial axe murderer, she was a complete stranger. I frowned without realizing that I did it. "I don't know you." The Girl's expression faltered for a moment, I could tell in the way she looked at me, that she was someone who was used to getting what she wants. 

Finally she let out a long breath that wasn't quite a sigh. "Fine." Her lips pulled back up into a dazzling smirk. "I guess I'll be here tomorrow then." She started to walk away, her shoulder brushed mine and it made my whole body absolutely burst with warmth. "I heard this place has great bacon and eggs."


	3. Chapter 3

I barely had any sleep.

I was up all night, tossing and turning. Thinking about RA. How she just showed up and asked me to go somewhere with her. I kind of felt like shit that I chickened out. But yet, I barely knew this girl. I didn't even know her damn name and she wanted me to take a walk with her. I remembered the way her shoulder brushed mine, and her promise in my ear. "I'll be here tomorrow then." It made my heart race just thinking about it.

I showed up 30 minutes early for work, kicking sand off my boots as I stepped in the front entrance to the cafe. The place was dead empty-probably because it wasn't open yet-the only other people there were a few cooks and, of course, Max. She gave me a startled look as I shut the cafe door behind me, rubbing my hands together to create friction and heat up my frozen fingertips. "Chloe, you're early. Is everything okay?" Max asked carefully, her brow knitted in confusion, and fear. You know that you're a shitty employee when your boss is worried that you're early for work. I gave a short nod. "Couldn't sleep. The power was out again so I figured..." I didn't really need to finish my sentence. Max knew what my home life was like, and I knew she understood. A gentle smile pulled at her lips. "Well you can have a few minutes to relax. The diner doesn't open for a while."

I sighed and practically dropped into one of the booths. The worn seat cushions felt surprisingly comfy. I sank lower into the seat. Smells from the kitchen started to waft through the cafe as the cooks started to work. Max and Beau always wanted the cooks to start early, so by the time people showed up, it was smelling fantastically. That's one of the only things I actually liked about this place, I drew lazy circles on the table in front of me with my index finger.

My heart thudded in my chest just thinking about what was going to happen today. Why had I let that girl take my mind over? Something about it swirled in my brain. I kept thinking back to what Jefferson said. 'Sexual attraction.' He thought I was gay for this girl? I never knew myself as a gay person, quite the opposite, actually. I mean, I wasn't homophobic, or anything. I was just really into guys. I'd had my share of flings or even short relationships with plenty of guys. But I guess I never really got to keep a real relationship going.

I knew Max had a girlfriend. I've seen them together more than once. They really are a cute couple, why couldn't I have that? I drove everyone away because of how closed off I was. Just an introverted girl who didn't want to let anyone in, because I was afraid they would leave like my parents did. But there really was something about this girl that made my heart go crazy. Did I have some sort of weird feelings for her? I've never liked someone of the same gender before, so I had no damn idea. I felt really lost the more and more I thought about her.

A hand suddenly appeared beside mine on the table, and I nearly jumped out of my skin. I looked up to find that the hand belonged to Max. She had a thoughtful expression on her face. "You look like you have a lot on your mind." I bit my lip and looked back down at the table, my own finger continued to trace invisible patterns on the table. It began to hurt the pad of my index.

Max sat across the table from me, taking my hands in her cold ones. "Chloe. What's bothering you?" I slowly looked from the table to her. She had an apron on and some sort of cooking ingredient smeared on her face. It was kind of cute in a way, she wore the look well. God, there it was again! What, was I crushing on Max now? I forced a breath out and looked at her, I really needed closure to what I was feeling. And not from some stupid therapist.

"Max... When you met your girlfriend. How, like, did you know she was the one?" It sounded pathetic, I was aware. But I really needed to know what kind of advice my best friend would give me. Max gave a small smile. "Kate? Oh..." She looked out the window, and immovable smile on her face. I could tell that she was thinking of how her and Kate met. "I was such a klutz. I felt all panicky and flustered. She thought it was hilarious." I gulped heavily. That was similar as to what I was like when first seeing RA. I remembered pouring coffee all over the table and mumbling like a dumbass. I was surprised that she didn't think I was a maniac and walk away.

"Why you asking Chloe?" Max tore her eyes from the window to where I sat. I wiggled my fingers, which were trapped in Max's. Thinking of some excuse. "I just, saw a guy recently and... he's kind of my type." It kind of hurt, lying to Max. But I didn't want to be at all public about this until I knew what it was, myself. Max gave me a heavy look. "Be careful with him then, Chloe. I'm tired of seeing you chase everyone off." Damn, even when I lie to her, Max still finds a way to give me advice about my problems. I nodded.

Max's thumb rubbed along my hands thoughtfully, then she stood and smoothed herself out. "Don't get too caught up on it, Chloe." She said thoughtfully, tying her apron. "Just talk to him. Take it easy." She smiled and patted my hand one last time before sauntering back to the kitchen. That was easy enough for her to say, she wasn't discovering her sexuality for the first time.

Wait, no. I knew my sexuality. There was no way I was gay for this girl, I was just having a weird day and she freaked me out. This would all pass soon, I just needed to let it. The speakers in the corners of the roof crackled to life and indie alternative music started to play from the speakers. Max's favorite music, she was definitely up to something. After a minute to ponder myself, I finally stood up, stretching out the sore muscles in my back.

I walked to the back and slung my apron on, I took notice of Beau's absence. "Max, hey. Where's Beau?" I asked. Her expression changed to puzzled momentarily, then she recovered. "He called in a sick day. I'm manager today." She gave a small smile. "So be on your best behaviour. I don't want to fire anyone." Her smile continued to be bright and positive as she went back to cooking. That was odd. As long as I knew him, Beau was never sick. He always showed up and always worked. I wrinkled my nose but decided not to pry Max more, she was busy working.

I put on my apron backwards so I could tie it up, then turned it around, slipping my notebook and pencil into the pockets unenthusiastically. Time to fucking work, I guess.

Despite my conflicting feelings, my stomach felt giddy about seeing RA. I picked at the pencil eraser from my pocket while I went to open the door to the diner. Unsurprisingly, It was dead in the diner.

Which wasn't totally surprising. Even after I waited around for a while, wiping already clean tables and listening to the static and followed Max's music in the speakers, barely anyone came. Mondays and Tuesdays were typically our slowest days. I was prepared to buckle down for a boring ass shift. There wasn't much to do on days like this, really. I spent my time playing tabletop sports with the sugar packets, or, eating them. Always when Max's back was turned, I didn't need another excuse for her to yell at me again. 

Though whenever she 'yelled' it wasn't that bad. A teddy bear trying to be intimidating, adorable, really. As a few occasional customers dripped in, I tended to them, pouring coffee or taking their stupid orders. None of them really seemed to notice I was there, barely looked at me. Why were rich pricks in a cafe like this if they were just going to act like rich pricks? I was honestly prepared to fake sickness so I could go back to my house.

But then, finally. 2 hours after we opened, RA had arrived at the diner. She stuck out like a sore thumb compared to the rest of the people here, but not in a bad way. She wore a shirt from a band I really don't think I recognized, but they seemed pretty hardcore. Overtop was a sweet grunge flannel, black and red checkered, it looked fucking hardcore, I could respect that. To top off the outfit were a pair of ripped jeans that were torn in all the right areas, and that damn blue feather dangling from her ear. She glanced around the diner, when her eyes found me, standing behind the counter, her lips folded into a smirk.

She walked over to a booth and slid into the seat, looking out the window with practiced effortlessness. I gulped and grabbed the coffee pot. Here went nothing...

I walked through the empty diner to where RA sat, her arms crossed on the table in front of her, the red flannel really did her wonders. The torn look of the grunge material gave her a cool sort of authentic vibe which too many people are trying to force on themselves, so it looks tacky and overdone. But this style fit RA like a damn glove. I felt my toes tingle as she cleared her throat, gaining her attention. "Coffee?" I asked, showing her the mostly full pot in my hands. She gave a gentle nod, and I poured it into an empty mug on the table, being careful this time, not to overfill it.

She watched as well, keeping a steady eye on my hand as I tilted the pot to the side and allowed the liquid to pour out. As I finished, the smirk on her face grew to an amused sort of look, I could see her teeth biting down on the inside of her lips. "Why don't you join me?" The girl asked sweetly, carefully grabbing a sugar packet and tore it open with one swift movement.

My mind immediately scrambled for an excuse. I'm not sure why, but panic filled me as I tried to think of something to get me out of conversing with this girl. "Job. I uh, I'm on my shift right now." Nailed it. Didn't fuck up even once. Besides a few stutters, but that's fine, I could have repeated what happened on Sunday, and damn, I didn't want to repeat what happened on Sunday. The girl scanned the diner carefully, not a single soul was there, I knew it too. She looked back at me and raised an eyebrow. "And surely you're so busy. A single coffee with a girl like me will throw everything off." She had a point, I hated that she had a point. I had no choice didn't I? I unceremoniously dropped myself into the seat across the table from her, setting down the coffee pot. RA seemed pleased.

I didn't know what to say. I just sat and watched as RA reached up and ran her thumb along the blue feathered earring idly, as if the movement came naturally  to her. She looked back at me, her lips curling upwards. "Thanks for joining me..." She trailed off, I was clueless as to why, then I figured that she was asking for my name. "Uh, Chloe." I responded. It felt weird to say my own name, was that a normal thing? Did other people feel that too? Saying your own name is weird.

"Chloe. Thank you for joining me, Chloe." Something jolted down my spine when she spoke my name. I loved it. The way she said my name was entrancing, I wanted her to say my name over and over again. A lighthearted chuckle broke me from the bounds of a trance. The girl stared at me with amusement glinting in her eyes. She waved her hand in front of my face. "Hey, earth to Chloe." I realized that I'd been staring like an asshole. I blinked feverishly and rubbed my eyes with my hand. The girl laughed. "Everything okay over there?"

I felt my cheeks begin to heat. Embarrassment spread from my head to my toes. I needed to find a way to recover, so I thought of my classic Chloe Price sass talk that always helps me recover. "Yep. I just love staring at girls like an asshole." Dear god, what the hell was that? My sass maker was broken, I was just a blubbering dumbass. This girl probably thinks I'm a freak now. But then she laughed. She fucking laughed. It shocked me. I let a chuckle bubble from my lips, too. "You are something else, Chloe." She sipped her drink and gave me a look that made my throat thick.

I recovered quickly, there was one thing I needed before I would trust this girl. I crossed my arms on the table in front of me, leaning forward onto them. The girl watched me closely before I spoke. "You know my name. So it's my turn. What's yours?"

She stopped mid-movement. Her mug just inches away from her lips. She snagged her bottom lip between her teeth and set the mug down carefully. My eyes watched the trail of steam as the mug moved swiftly to the table. "I'm Rachel. Rachel Amber."

Rachel Amber. RA. I should have guessed that.

"Good to meet you, Rachel Amber." I smirked, finally finding my snark. My Chloe Price sass. Rachel seemed to be charmed. She tilted her head to the head slightly, her earring brushing the bare skin on her shoulder. Which I couldn't keep my eyes off for a moment. Rachel sat back in her seat, a wicked grin stretching across her face, the impish look scared me. "Let's do something fun." She beamed, waiting for my approval, which I really couldn't give. I met this girl two days ago, I just learned her name, and she wants to have 'fun'? My head spun and I rested my hand on the table to level myself.

"I'm... I'm in the middle of a shift. I can't just-" I began, but she interrupted me. "Come on, we can just go take a walk on the beach. Tell your boss you'll be on break. We will only be 10 minutes." She looked at me with a disguised look. But I could see in her eyes that she really wanted me to do this, I let out a sigh, this girl really didn't take no for an answer, did she?

I leaned back and looked over at the kitchen, where Max stood quietly and watched one of the new recruits cook some sort of egg sandwich thingy. "Yo Max." I hollered. Max didn't look up, but she flinched in a way that I knew she was listening. "I'm taking my break." Max, without looking away, yet again, stuck up her thumb in approval. I looked back at Rachel who seemed giddy to get moving, and nodded at her. "Well I guess that settles it. Let's go." Rachel nearly sprung up, but instead she rose to her feet in a sophisticated manner, then grabbed my wrist and yanked me out the door.

I stumbled trying to keep up with her. This girl had an iron grip that made my wrist sore as hell. Rachel shoves the door open and we rush outside. The strong smell of salty ocean attacking my nostrils as I skidded behind Rachel, who was pulling me to the water. When she let me go, I rubbed my sore wrist, I had no doubt that was going to bruise.

Yesterday's sunny sky was now replaced with near-black clouds. Rain was usually common in January, so I wasn't surprised if mother nature was about to piss on us. Rachel stood, facing the ocean. Then threw her head back, nose pointing towards the sky, and took a deep inhale. "Don't you just love Los Angeles?" Rachel practically sang, she started to hop and swirl and her snide smirk was replaced with a genuine smile, spread from cheek to cheek. I didn't answer her question, figured it was rhetorical anyway, and watched her, instead. How could this girl go from being calm and snide, to being fun and playful. I just started to know this girl, and she already started to give me a headache. It wasn't quite a bad one either.

"Hey, come on. Answer my question!" Rachel whipped around and grabbed my hands, at a speed which made me flinch. She held on tight to my hands and started to spin, taking me with her. We both started to spin clumsily on the sand, arms taught and our sweaty palms gripping together. Small giggles started to bubble from Rachel's mouth as we spun. And, I couldn't help it, I started laughing too. My hands slipped out of hers, Rachel and I fell to the sand in a flurry of laughs and curses. I felt sand scrape my cheek and it left a searing pain, but I ignored it, that was too fun. Rachel sat up in front of me, her eyes squeezed shut, wheezing out laughs chuckles that made my chest warm. I watched her flick sand off her shirt and did so myself. "You asked me if I love Los Angeles?" I brushed the sand off my cheek and flinched as my fingers touched a scrape of my skin. "Well, no, I really don't like it here."

Rachel stopped where she sat, the brushing motions she was making with her hand froze. She cocked her head to the side. "Why wouldn't you like it here? This place is amazing!" She got to her feet, and looked out at the Ocean, with the biggest smile on her face. I stood, too. "Not when you've lived here your whole life." I sighed out to the water, I didn't want to look at Rachel anymore, surely she was looking at me weird.

A sudden warm feeling on my shoulder made me jump. Rachel placed her hand on my shoulder. It was a foreign feeling. Yeah, Max did it sometimes, but Max was more of a hugger. Her touches were always for a reason, to cheer me up or motivate me. Rachel took my flinching for being uncomfortable, so she moved her hand away, but I didn't want her to. I almost grabbed her wrist and put her palm back on the fabric of my shirt. But I refrained. I looked at her in the eyes. A dangerous move.

Her eyes were so sincere, so enticing. It was hard to look away. They were a perfect brown, flecked with green, shining in the greyish blue of the sky. Her gaze was soft, it was begging me to open up to her. To tell her all my secrets and imperfections, but I refrained myself, just barely. "I've lived here all my life Rachel. This town has treated me like shit." I shook my head. I used to be rich, living on Hollywood Boulevard. Things used to be so perfect. Then a damn Semi truck took my life away.

"Oh. I'm sorry." Rachel sighed, and she actually sounded like she meant it. She wasn't saying it to make me feel better or just because it was the right response. Her voice sounded so true and sincere that she sounded like she really meant it. I gave her a gentle nod, but I wasn't sure what to say back. Rachel turned back to the water, listening to the waves crashing along the shore. The sudden quietness between us left a pit in my stomach. But the water was so calming along with the presence of someone near me. Rachel spoke.

"I just came here. I moved from a shitty old town. I got a job here and I'm starting soon." Rachel let out a deep sigh. I turned my head to face her. Rachel trained her eyes on the water, unmoving, but I could tell she knew I was looking at her. "When I lived in my tiny town, I was always under the idea that LA is 'The Big City,' that it's where dreams come true. But it's hard to make it here, my dad warned me that many people can't make it. That only a few people come to LA and make it out alive." She finally turned, looking at me with determination in her eyes. "But I will make it, Chloe. I swore to myself. I'll do it."

I admired her confidence. But something about that shook me. "Are your parents here with you Rachel?" I asked. Her face formed into a frown, she huffed. "No. But I'm eighteen. I can make it myself. I have a job." The confidence in her voice was unwavering. I decided to take a step down. No one was getting in this girl's way. I nodded in defeat and let the subject drop to the sand, lapsing into silence. Rachel's hair blew in the wind, tickling my shoulder as it did. I suddenly realized how close we had been standing, watching the waves in pure silence. There are just some people that you don't need to interact with to feel their presence, to really connect with. Rachel was one of those people. I felt something wet touch my face from above, rain started. Rachel obviously felt it too, as she laughed and wiped her face with a flannel sleeve.

"Let's go inside." I prompted to her, feeling another fat drop of rain slap my head. Rachel stepped away from the water, which started to get angry from the rain. "I should go get to my job meeting. If I'm lucky I can start working by Friday." Rachel answered, her head shrunk down from the rain. It kinda made me upset that she was gonna bail. But her job should be more important than me. Hell, I didn't want this girl to end up like me. "Let's do it again Tomorrow?" Rachel asked, but it wasn't much of a question as it was an expectation, I agreed.

"Here," Rachel pulled her phone out, tucking it close to her stomach to make sure it didn't touch the rain. "Let me give you my phone number."

I gulped, then shook my head. "I.. uh, I don't have a phone." Rachel looked up from hers suddenly, a surprised expression on her face. "You don't have a phone?" I shook my head, silently. I felt suddenly ashamed, I'm not sure why. Not having a phone had never been a problem before. I had no friends-besides Max, who I just talked to at work-so there was never a need to have a phone for setting up plans, and work wasn't an issue, because Max and Beau knew I would show up, if I wanted to be able to feed myself.

"I'll meet you back here, then?" Rachel nodded back to the cafe. There was no other option, was there? Rachel took my silence as an agreement and stuffed her phone back into her pocket. She then stared at me silently, a small smile working on her lips as she tilted her head back and forth, scanning my face with her perfect hazel eyes. I felt my face heat up under the attention. Suddenly Rachel stepped forward and reached her hand up, touching the blue tips of my strawberry hair. "Blue is a good look on you." She smiled, then let the hair drop back onto my chin.

"We will meet again, Chloe." Rachel declared, like a classic movie villain, then walked past me and across the beach. A whiff of jasmine hit me like a fist. It was overpowering and beautiful. The smell of Rachel Amber, so intoxicating that I wanted to bury my face in it and smell it forever.

Fuck, I was gay, wasn't I?


	4. Chapter 4

 

Why did my house always smell like shit?

I swore. All the time there was a smell in my house that didn't belong to me. My toilet was well kept. I took my clothes to the laundromat every week, so I didn't know where that damn smell was coming from. It wasn't weed. That was for sure. Because unlike weed, this smell was just pure rank. Weed had a rankness to it, but it was a good kind of rank. This is was just gross. It smelled like death. I really hoped it wasn't death. I gripped a soggy plank of wood I kinda found sitting in the road. I didn't care it's origin, I just figured I might need it if the smell was coming from something living. The chances of that were very low. But, I wanted to be safe, just in case.

I stalked the halls of the tiny house again, scraping the moldy plank along the creaky wooden floors. I took notice of how the paint was peeling off the walls, or rippling in a fashion that looked like I was too poor to fix it. And I was, so that look was fitting. By then I reminded myself that the mold of the plank would chip off and make my floor all dirty. But by then it was too late. My shoulders felt exhausted from pulling the weight of the soggy plank, and from 'holding my head high.' Which was Beau's fancy term for not slouching. I don't know why he even bothered. The diner was pretty dead again. Rush hour had some people, as well as noon. But otherwise? Place was a damn graveyard. Not even Rachel showed up.

I felt disappointed. She said she would meet me at the diner today. But guess what? I was the only one who showed up. I may as well had been wearing a fucking prom dress. There was a big chance that Rachel found out how lame and useless I was and decided never to talk to me again. That seemed very likely at that point. So many people had left me over the years, that one more really didn't seem that far fetched.

The smell was at its strongest in my kitchen. God, the fridge hadn't failed again, had it? If my food was rotten...

I pulled open the fridge. It was working perfectly fine, all 7 things inside were nice and fresh. The smell wasn't coming from my fridge, then. I slammed the door shut and surveyed the small room. My eyes watering from the pure rancid smell, I stepped towards my pantry and I almost vomited from how powerful the smell had become. It was definitely coming from my pantry. I slowly reached to the pantry door knob. As if a killer would pop out if I opened it.

Was a killer going to pop out if I opened it?

I tightened my grip on the plank and grab the door knob, yanking my pantry open to find. A rat? Shit! That's a dead rat. I flinched at first seeing it. How long had it been in there? I haven't used my pantry in a long while. That thing could have been in there for a long time and I never would have known. A wave of the death smell hit me and I gagged, dropping the plank to put my shirt over my nose, blocking out the putrid smell. "God, fucking..." I muttered under the thin cloth. I really needed to get that thing out of my house.

Keeping one hand on my nose, I used the other to grab the plank. I slowly brought the plank over to the rat, nudging it slowly. The rat flipped onto it side, revealing its stomach, which was partly rotted through. "Oh g-!" I exclaimed, dropping the plank and walking away from the pantry. That thing was fucking disgusting, I gagged once more and breathed through my mouth for a few seconds. How did I plan on getting that thing out of my house? It's not like I could just scoop it up with my hands and toss it out. I was not doing that shit.

I snatched my soggy ass plank and stepped back into the pantry, sucking in a large breath through my mouth. Then holding it in. I used the plank to flick the rat out of the pantry, watching it do log rolls across the wooden floor. My stomach lurched. Scrambling for ideas, I quickly opened the kitchen door, that led to the back alley. Rain poured down continually. It had been raining nearly non stop since Rachel and I had been standing on the beach together, trading our life stores, even though having barely met each other.

I grabbed the plank and went to the rat, lining it up to the dead animal before I swung like a golfer, sending the rat flying outside my house. I finally let myself breathe, keeping the door open to allow the smell to leave. How long was that dead rat in my pantry anyway? Of course I didn't smell it, my house always has the aroma of weed, anyway. I'd prefer weed over dead rat any day.

And speaking of weed... I was excessively sober right there. I shuffled over to my kitchen counter, in search of a small jar. Snatching it, I pried open the lid, which read Chloe's Droogz-I labeled that myself, when I was so high I could barely stand. Which is why it's in very illegible handwriting-and grabbed a roll of bills from inside. My weed supply was low and that was not acceptable. I stepped out my open kitchen door, taking the plank and tossing into the bushes as I went. The fence surrounding my backyard-if you could even call it that, just a tiny square of lawn that gives you the illusion that I have  a backyard-was so pitiful that I just hopped it, regretting so as I almost slipped in the mud on the other side of the fence. The rain had made dirt slippery. Duh, Chloe.

Frank Bowers, local drug dealer, lived just 3 houses away from where I was. He had a considerably nicer pad (it had 2 floors!) than mine, since he kind of made a business selling drugs around here. His backyard didn't have a fence, so I just waltzed right into his property, and up to his back door. A small sign read Beware Guard Dog on his doorstep. I smirked at it, Pompidou was a dog, but not a guard dog. Albeit, kinda scary, but all bark no bite. I rapped on the door, and flinched as loud barking came from inside. Okay... pretty scary dog.

Frank took a while to answer, telling his dog to shut up as he came towards the door. He cracked it open, enough for me to catch a portion of his face, and smell a whiff of the inside air of his house. He was obviously toking up before I came here, the pink of his eyes and the strong ass weed smell were enough to let me know that. "What do you want, Price?" Frank growled, opening the door further so I could see him more, and the dog behind his heels, growling and ready to pounce.

"Weed." I responded, holding up my small roll of bills. "S'all I want." I wiggle the bills for effect, quirking my eyebrows. "Fine." Frank responded, "after you give me the 230 dollars you owe me." He looked at me, dead serious. Was this guy fucking kidding? I was holding money, right in his face, but he still denied me weed? "Listen, Frank. I don't have the 200,  but I do have this, so you either get payment for this time, or no payment at all." I responded, waving the cash once more to get my point across. Frank considered, then sighed and snatched the roll from my hand. "But this is the last time Price, then you owe me. I'm not your fucking piggy bank." Frank said. Just like he had last time... He retreated back into the house, and left me staring at his snarling dog, I coughed at the animal.

A small baggie in hand, Frank came back and dropped it into my hands. "Now get out of here, Price. You're annoying me." I had to give credits to the guy, he came off as this tough bad boy type, but really, he was as harmless as a rainbow. "Love you too, Frank." I replied, a smile on my face as I left his property. Perfect, now I had some drugs.

Back at my house, I wasted no time lighting one of my new prizes, putting it to my lips and inhaling a large amount of sweet, sweet weed. I blew out a hefty cloud of smoke while I slumped onto my bed, the lumpy mattress wasn't always comfortable, but it served its purpose, I guess. I pulled more vapor into my lungs and let it soothe me. Nothing in this place really could calm me down like my drugs did. Life had been fucking hectic since my mom left.

She ditched me in my old house, which was soon taken from me when rent suddenly stopped getting paid. Child services found me, tried to take me to one of their shelters. I fought, but they still got me, put me in one of those shelters or whatever. I inhaled a thick layer of smoke.

I aged out, or whatever, like a year ago. The foster home gave me just enough to survive, and left the rest to me, and that's why I lived in a Low Income Area and had beer for breakfast. My thieving skills had earned me a low end job, but it was all I had, so I took it. The mattress below me trembled on its support, the bed frame on this thing was like, a million years old, so every night it threatened to tumble. But every night it stood strong, somehow.

Someday, I magically hoped that I would somehow be able to attend school again, get a diploma and a career in like, geoengineering or some shit. But even someone like me would know that dream is useless, I was too far behind to be able to suddenly get success and fame like that. I was condemned to live this life, and some day, in the future, someone will find me dead in this damn house, my insides have rotted themselves. I inhaled more smoke. That future didn't sound that bad from where I was laying. Or maybe it was the rapidly working weed talking.

My brain started to cloud as the drugs took their effect on me. I felt light and happy, drugs were my only friend some days, when I was mad, or sad, they helped mellow me out, they helped me relax. My muscles felt weak as I melted back into my bed, the weed doing wonderful things to my mind.

I could hear the patter of the rain on my roof, that was something I loved about my paper thin roof, was how I could hear the rain on my roof, the calming sound that put me to sleep like a lullaby. I watched the smoke from my joint twirl in the air, curling and rising to my roof until it eventually evaporated.

My mind kept wandering to how Rachel stood me up. But could I actually say that? I don't even think she had any real intentions to meet me up. And even if she did, I don't think she wanted to go on a date with me. Why did I want her to ask me on a date anyway, was it something that gay people want? Or it might be a thing that normal people that have normal relationships want.

I sighed out a cloud of smoke, my head felt stuffed with cotton balls as the weed took my brain over. It was a feeling I embraced, that I craved. I sucked in more toxic drugs to take over my mind, my lungs felt sore from getting poisoned by the bright green contents of my joint. My body's inhibition grew weak as I grabbed a second joint, flicking my lighter once, twice, thrice until I could finally get a flame.

As I worked my way through another joint, my body felt tingly, my worries evaporated and It was just the weed. This was my preferred state, I spent most of my time high as a kite, or asleep when I wasn't at work, I lay in bed the rest of the night. Letting the weed take me away from this place, and bring me somewhere better. With being high, also brought the feeling of being empty. I felt like I was in a constant state of limbo, nothing was real, yet nothing was fake, either.

The tip of my joint glowed orange in the dim light of my bedroom. I stared at it, because it was the most mesmerizing thing in this room. The way smoke slowly unfurled from the bright orange tip caught all of my dwindling attention and held it, even as I put the joint to my lips once more, pulling in more toxic but beautiful vapors, and let them pull me even further down into a dark and welcoming abyss.

My brain lurched, vision getting swirly and dizzy from the intoxicating drugs eating their way through my consciousness. I couldn't feel any of my limbs anymore. Did I even have limbs, or skin for that matter? Well I must have, since I had been absently staring at the joint in my hand for like, a minute. Or an hour, I really wasn't sure at that point. All I knew is that the drugs took my pain away, and all I wanted was more of it.

More

MoRe

M O R E

Man, this shit is probably laced

I forced out a stream of smoke while my vision swam. My eyelids tugged down, and my head lulled to the side, my muscles incapable of keeping it upright anymore. I inhaled the last length of my joint, then threw it to the ground in frustration that it was dead. I swung my body to the side, so I could stomp on the stub of joint. Then rolled back into the center of the bed and allowed the drugs to pull me into a dreamless sleep.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun Fact: This chapter was the longest to write, taking almost a whole month

Two days later, and Rachel Amber was still MIA. I shouldn't be surprised, she probably just pranked me or whatever. I didn't really know her, so there was a chance she was some rich LA prick who thought it would be so funny to pull a prank on me. Well I wasn't amused. Waiting tables took my mind off of it, however. Repeated motions and patterns always had a way of calming me down. Bring some coffee here, bring a bagel there, circle around and repeat. I was a good alternative to clearing my head when weed wasn't in the picture.

Max seemed to notice my distracted nature, as she soon took me off order job, and had me just cleaning tables instead. "What's the big deal?" I asked her, my tone not intending to be sharp, but coming off that way anyways. She looked at me and sighed. "You've been off task, Chloe. You seem a little disoriented, you seem..." Max looked around and lowered her voice. "You seem high." She whispered, as if saying the word would bring her to hell. "What?" I responded in normal talking volume, which startled Max, as she was standing so close to me. "I'm not high, Max." Well, at least, not anymore. Last night was a lot of fun.

Max puffed out a disappointed breath. "Then get on task, Chloe. Beau's on his way and it would suck for him to see you moping around again." Her eyes looked worrisome. I knew I could always count on Max to be like a worried mother, despite how achingly sober I was. "I'll get on it, Maxie." I reassured, grabbing her shoulder and giving a tight squeeze. Max's frown slid away and she nodded. "Get back out there, Pirate." She smiled and returned to her work in the kitchen.

I turned and grabbed a coffee pot from the counter before going into the diner to fill *up orders. Be more productive. Yeah, I could do that. With an artificial skip in my step, I started to clean the tables. First spray, then wipe. Not very difficult, I really like the repetitive motion of it. I tried to get myself lost in it, pushing Rachel and my disappointment away. I didn't need her, there were other guys (and girls, if I was still into that?) in the city. That was something that happened to everyone, I had to just move on.

But something out of the corner caught my eye. A server in a bright red jacket stood at a table, not taking anyone's order, really. Just chatting with someone. It was Nathan. I propped myself to my feet and investigated the situation. Nathan was talking to Rachel.

No fucking way.

I stepped angrily towards the commotion, my hand angrily slapping between Nathan's shoulder blades, I acted like it was a friendly gesture, but it was a kind of, step off. He helped and I tried to suppress a grin. "Nathan!" I greeted with feigned camaraderie. "What's going on over here?" I asked, looking Rachel right in the eye. She stared back with a dazzling look, she seemed almost confused, of me, or Nathan?

"Ouch, Chloe! That hurt!" Nathan whined, trying to touch the spot that I had slapped. I hope it left a bruise. I kept up my mock enthusiasm. "Sorry Nathan, I just wanted to see how my co worker was doing."

Rachel could obviously tell what I was doing. Because she leaned back in her chair, a large smile curling her lips."Co-workers are buddies, 'Nathan.' So why can't I say hi every once in a while?" She plaid along, her hands holding carefully on the table. Every movement she made was calculated and precise. I got caught on it for a second before I regained my footing. "I guess you don't want to talk, then." I puffed out a sad breath for effect, and Nathan seemed confused. Part of me felt bad for messing with him. He never really did anything wrong, he was a gentle person. But he was interfering with me and Rachel, I wouldn't let that happen.

"No, Chloe I-" Nathan started, but he fumbled for a proper response. Floundering like a fish out of water. It felt fun to be God for a minute, but I decided that our play-session was over. "Max is calling you, I think." I said, my head tilted towards the kitchen, as if I was listening to a voice from within it. "Shit, okay." Nathan sounded stressed, and that was because of me. Not gonna lie, I was proud. "I'm sorry, Chloe. Talk later?" I didn't give him an answer as he hurried into the kitchen, my mischief levels felt quiet happy as I turned, eyeing Rachel. Who also, looked quite happy with the trickery we had done.

I slid into the booth across from her, grabbing the coffee pot that Nathan abandoned and pouring a considerable amount in the mug standing in front of Rachel. "Who was that guy?" Rachel chuckled, bringing the mug towards her, and grabbing a sugar packet from the metal holder that they were in. "Nathan. He works here with me, I guess." I shrugged. I'd known Nathan since I started working here, but I didn't really get along with him. He was always so damn happy, and it really pissed me off.

"He's... friendly." Rachel commented, stirring the sugar into coffee with a stirring stick. I huffed in response and grabbed a sugar packet for my own, tearing the opening and throwing my head back, dumping the sugar onto my tongue. Rachel watched in amusement, I brought my head down and licked the rest of the sugar off my lips. Rachel mirrored the movement, unintentionally. "So. What the hell?" I asked sharply, flicking the empty sugar packet between my fingers on the table. "I haven't heard from you in days, Rachel." I finished, tossing the packet continually, until one of my fingers missed it, and the bag fluttered to the floor soundlessly.

Rachel scowled, leaning forwards onto her hands. "Yeah, I'm sorry about that. Starting up work was more time consuming than I anticipated. The modeling agency has me all over the place for gigs." Rachel stirred her coffee idly, her mind obviously elsewhere. "Modeling agency, huh?" I asked. She never did tell me what she did as a job, did she?

Modelling was the right fit for her. She was small and kind of frail, but goddamn did she have the looks of a supermodel. Her flawless eyes and flawless curvy frame, she looked like one of those models that people shame for being a bad influence on the public because they starve themselves to look perfect. But I could tell on how Rachel practically chugged her coffee, that she didn't force her body to be this way.

"Hell yah." Rachel wiped coffee from her mouth with her sleeve. "They found me in that shitty town and gave me an offer I couldn't refuse. Lot's of cash payment too." So Rachel was going to be a rich LA model. What was she doing hanging around me, then? She was probably going to get bored of me and move on to someone else, and rich. Like Nathan. (Who I'm still really confused by, why does he work here if he's rich?!)

"Sounds like you lucked out there." I replied, waving off my own self doubts and grabbed another sugar packet. Rachel gave me a peculiar look. "How so?"

I ripped open the packet and paused to speak. "Well, if I was in your position, I would be crawling towards that offer. I'm some poor kid who never got to finish school. So this and stripping are really the only career choices I've got." I let out a low chuckle. "Maybe even stripping is out of the running. I don't have the body for that."

Rachel frowned at my self-deprecating remark. She reached out and placed a hand on top of mine. "Oh, Chloe..." Her voice was heavy with sympathy. "Any chick has a body for stripping. Men don't care what you look like. As long as you have tits."

I choked and sputtered. Salt. That was a salt packet, not sugar. I laughed at Rachel's stripper joke while I cringed at the heavy salt taste that seethed into my tongue. "Good to note." I could hear the strain in my own voice as I swallowed a heavy gulp of salt infused saliva.

"So.. uh." I fumbled for the right thing to say. 'How's your job treating you?' 'Why didn't you at least try to contact me in the past few days?' 'Why are you just messing with me?' 'So, you like the bagels here?' Oh god, I'm obsessed, aren't I? Because, surely this isn't what normal people do when they crush on someone, right? Like I'd ever know, I've only been in flings 'n shit. If only Max wasn't busy so I could ask her what I'm feeling...

"Hey." Rachel smiled, snapping me out of my own head. She leaned forward on her forearms and gave me an impish look. "Let's go have some fun." Fun? Oh, god. My brain scrambled for something to say in response. And naturally, it landed on something witty. "V card's been punched already, Rachel. I'm sorry." I gave a mock apologetic shrug and sat back in my seat with a nonchalant attitude.

"Wow." Rachel responded, her smug look twisting into one of complete surprise. Oh, shit. "Too far?" I kind of swiveled my head away from her, hiding it.

Rachel quickly recovered, her expression morphing back in to a sneaky look. "Well... I don't know." The last word broke into a chuckle, as she stated toying with the earring on her ear. "But I'm serious, let's go." Her fingers tapped along the table, antsy to get moving. I puffed out a nervous sigh. "Rachel, I want to. But my shift ends in an hour. "I can't just-"

"I can wait." Rachel interrupted.

"If it means getting to hang out with you. I can wait for the hour." Rachel then eyed her empty mug. "But I'll need some coffee and food if I'm going to wait." She flicked her fingers absently along the mug. I smirked, "deal."

After I grabbed what Rachel wanted. I started off for the longest hour of my life-besides that one time my power cut out for an hour and I had no weed-and did my job. Every little while I would check how Rachel was doing, or just give her a glance on my way by, thinking that each time I would look, she would be gone. Deciding that waiting for me to finish my job was too boring and bolted.

Max definitely noticed this, as she gave me a few skeptical looks. I wanted to tell her how I feel about Rachel, but it wasn't the time. I wanted to get to know Rachel more, explore what I was feeling before I opened up to anyone, even Max.

But yet, Rachel stayed for one whole hour. She was there as I took off my apron, and said goodbye to Max for now, I was probably going to come back to the diner later for a snack, I knew Max had me covered.

Rachel stood and waited by the door for me to come join her. Her expression turned giddy as I came closer to her. Once I stood face to face (Or more like face to collarbone) with her, Rachel grabbed my wrists and tugged me out of the quaint diner, onto the sand of the Santa Monica beach.

"Finally! Let's get going. The Santa Monica pier waits for no one!" Rachel let my hands go and let me walk on my own, starting a brisk pace as she started for Santa Monica. I had no choice to follow her, did I? I started off after her, eventually catching up and walking beside her as we made our way to the pier.

"I've always wanted to go the Santa Monica Pier." Rachel sauntered on the shoreline. Her gait loose and effortless as her shoes sunk into the wet sand. "I'd heard a lot about it at home. The pictures looked so beautiful. It was, like, the first place I came when I got to LA. So magical." Rachel flinched as water touched her bare ankles, the smiled and kicked at back towards the ocean. I watched, and smiled without really meaning to.

"That special huh?" I smirked and bumped her with my shoulder. "Then why you taking me there?"

Rachel didn't hesitate. "Figured it was a good place for a date." She continued along the coastline. I, however, stopped in my tracks. Hold up, a date?

Rachel kept going until she noticed I wasn't following. She looked around in a momentary panic, then her eyes finally caught me standing in place. "What?" She asked worriedly, stepping towards me. "Did I say something?"

I struggled to find the words I wanted to, but my brain was scrambling with them, trying to form a coherent sentence for me to push out of my lips. "You- You think this is a date?" I really didn't think she thought of me like that. Did I even feel that way about her?

Of course you do, Chloe. I thought we went over that.

Great, now I'm talking to myself.

Rachel stepped forwards (or backwards?) Towards where I was standing. "Well, of course I do." She crossed her arms, cocking her head to the side. "Unless you don't feel that way?" Shit. Was she asking me if I was gay towards her? The answer was obvious, but for some reason I had a hard time pushing it out of my throat.

"W-wuh-well. Yeah, I do." I scratched the back of my neck nervously. I felt like I blew the whole thing. And there was a chance that I did. Did she expect me to know she was bringing me on a date? Now that I thought about it, she probably did.

Rachel smiled. "Great. Then let’s continue the date." She extended her hand out for me. I took it.

Something in my heart swelled. I know I just met this girl.. But going on a date with her could give me a time to get to know her, but I was still a little worried. "Well, I don't know... You could be like an axe murderer or something." I chuckled, my hand tightened in hers.

Rachel laughed out loud. "An axe murderer?" She wheezes out, laughing hard. "Chloe. You're fucking hilarious." I hadn't meant to. But, I liked Rachel's laugh, so I went with it. "Yea, Yeah I know."

Rachel and I walked along the coastline, Hand in hand as the Pier came closer. The smell of rotting fish and doughnuts-strange combo, even for LA-attacked my nostrils while Rachel tugged my hand up towards the road, to the entrance to the pier.

Rachel practically pranced into the pier, where I followed at a normal, but brisk, pace beside her. The sound of the lapping waves and Ferris Wheel brought back strong childhood memories, too painful to want to relive a second time. I dug my heels into the hard-wood and halted myself in my tracks.

My breaths heaved as Rachel was tugged back by me. She whipped around to see my frozen figure. Her eyebrows furrowed in confusion, which morphed into worry.

"Hey, Chloe. You doing okay?" She stepped towards me and kept our hands linked. "you're freaking me out Chloe, What's wrong?"

_What's wrong, hon?_

_Daddy, I'm scared._

_Why, sweetheart?_

_It's the sharks, daddy._

_What about them, Chloe?_

_I don't want them to attack me..._

_Oh, Chloe. They won't attack you, I won't let them._

_You won't?_

_Of course not, honey. I'll never leave you._

"Chloe! Chloe hey!" Rachel's voice rippled through the memory, tearing me from my weird night/day-mare. I blinked wildly and looked over at Rachel. her hand had left mine and instead, was held on my shoulder, accompanying the other hand resting on the opposite shoulder. "Jesus, what's wrong with you?"

My throat felt dry, and I tried to lubricate it somehow. I gulped down a heavy flow of saliva before I could actually speak. "Y-yeah." I responded shakily.

"What- Like. What's wrong, Chloe?" Rachel gave each of my shoulders a firm squeeze. I let her, and leaned into the motion while I allowed my thoughts to collect. "Yeah. Just.." I debated whether I should tell her the whole situation. "Just... Bad memories, that's all."

Rachel looked at me soberly, her eyes doping sadly. "Oh. If it's bothering you, we can go somewhere else." Her breaths were short. She seemed almost... Disappointed? I sighed, "no, I'm fine."

Rachel's frown persisted. She didn't seem like she believed me. But she let it drop, allowing a smile to come back to her lips, it wasn't as big and hopeful as before. But I'd take it. "Then let's get our asses in gear." Rachel's hands left my shoulders, which had the fabric that used to be occupied by her warm skin feeling cold. I felt better, however, when she grabbed my hand instead. "While we still have the place to ourselves."

I just took notice of the fact that she was right, the pier looked deserted, there was a couple people here and there, but otherwise. The place was a damn graveyard. Which meant Rachel and I could play. My expression of mischief matched Rachel's as we went further into the pier.

"First, should we grab food, or go shopping?" Rachel was ahead of me, her pace faster and antsier than mine. She suddenly dropped my hand, turning around and walking backwards on the pier. Her eyes on me, her feet walking her backwards. I chuckled at her when she wiggled her eyebrows at me.

My happiness faded as I remembered, I have no cash for either of those. I was fucking broke, how was I supposed to shop, or go out for dinner when I barely made minimum wage, and spent most of it on weed?

Okay, okay. I know that if I just quit weed, then I could put my money towards something useful, and then quit my whining. But it didn't work that way. Trust me, if I could just put weed down and walk away as if it were nothing, I would. But I can't.

The drugs pull you in, they comfort you, give you something to confide in and let go of your sorrows with. Then suddenly, they pull away and you're begging for more.

Begging.

I remembered the 3 months that Frank was away on some kind of vacation. I couldn't find another dealer for the life of me. I went all over the place. (trust me, I went everywhere,) but I was stranded 3 months without weed. It drove me crazy, that was the longest I had gone without having any drug release. I went insane, and had no drugs to fix myself.

I still have the scars to prove it.

Without my drugs. I got so antsy, so stressed and twitchy that I had to fidget to keep my mind from going off the rails completely. The only thing I had was nervous scratching. I fucking tore up my skin with my fingernails.

I suddenly realized that Rachel was pulling me into a fashion store, or whatever. I allowed her to pull me, because refusing would be useless against her iron grip.

"I'm going to try some stuff on." Rachel remarked, finally dropping my wrist, which became white from the death grip it was given. "You joining me?" My mind flicked back to my empty wallet. I bet that if I opened the shitty wallet, a damn fly would come buzzing out, if I had any money to bed, that is.

"Nah, man. I'll hang back." I absently ran my fingers along the bumpy scar tissue of my outer wrist, along the carpal bones. Memories of weed withdrawal stung the back of my brain.

"Suit yourself." Rachel replied, then dug into the rows and rows of clothes.

I decided to hang back, I was never one to love shopping, and I couldn't really buy anything, anyway. Rachel slipped around the isles, grabbing lots of clothes. She sauntered over to me and handed a pile to me.

"Here, hold this for now." The clothes landed in my arms with an oof. "I'll need your opinions on my outfits." Rachel's sly smirk had me staring as she stepped away, into the changing rooms and shut the door. I stared down at the clothes in my arms, why would Rachel need all this crap anyway? I wear the same outfit a couple days in a row before I decided to change them out. That's how my laundry always lasts a while. Chloe Price, saving water. Amirite?

I'm fucking gross, aren't I?

Well, it's what I had to do to keep my head above water. And Max didn't really care about it, Rachel didn't seem to. Yet.

Rachel popped her head out of the change room, then the rest of her body followed. She was wearing a bright purple flannel overshirt with a white, thin undershirt and skinny jeans. Even for someone like me, I could tell that the colors of that outfit were not mixing. Rachel looked to me for confirmation, which I denied, shaking my head and sending her back into the change room.

I sat and watched Rachel try on a multitude of outfits, some flannels here, crop tops and v-necks there. I wasn't sure why she was asking my opinion on clothing style. I'm sure to her that I'm a fashion disaster.

"Wonderful." Rachel smiled at the end, looking at the pile of clothes that made the cut, sitting in my arms. Her eyes looked up and locked with mine. "Why don't you go ahead and look around?"

My throat contracted and I scratched the back of my neck, this is where I panicked. I really didn't want to fully admit to how poor I was to her, seeing as how her clothes looked, and all the stuff she was buying here. But maybe I could lie...

"I'll take a look around. But no guarantees that I'll find anything in my style..." Good, good. Now just wander and claim nothing here fits you. Rachel sighed and grabbed the clothes from my arms. "Don't be so modest, at least take a look."

I definitely could do that. Now that Rachel's clothes were off my arms. I slowly picked my way through the isles. These clothes were goddamn fancy, I didn't see the need for fancy and overpriced clothes. They were just rags you put on your body. The overpriced and fancy clothes are just an illusion that people are more important than others.

I grazed my hand over the incredibly soft fabric of a white tank top. I looked at it more thoroughly. It had the skull of what looked like a buck or an elk on it, feathers hanging off the horns. I stared at the pattern, mesmerised.

Sticking my fingers in the neck, I searched for a price tag inside. I grasped it and pulled it out.

Whoa, no way man.

I put the white tank back, that was way too much for me to ever be able to pay. I sighed audibly. Rachel suddenly appeared behind me, I started and almost smacked her in the jaw. "Jeez!" I cried. "Gimme some room, next time. Ninja."

Rachel laughed behind me. She snatched the tank from my hands and inspected it. "Hella yeah. This is a good look for you."

I rolled my eyes. It wasn't the first time I heard the word 'hella', but I still didn't like it. Such a Californian term.

Says the Californian.

Shut up, you. I-I mean me. Great, I'm talking to myself now.

"You should try it on, Chloe. You'd fucking rock in this." Rachel smiled, pressing it to my stomach to see how it would look on me. "Yeah. Definitely rock in this." She gazed at the shirt once more before handing it back. "Go on."

I felt frozen where I stood, I really didn't want to put it on. Then I would have no choice but to buy it, and if I refused, Rachel would know something was up. "No. I-I-uh... It's cool... I-I um..." I reached for something to say, throwing anything out of my lips to stall until my brain could say something that actually made sense.

"Oh..." Rachel's eyes went down to where my thumb had subconsciously been rubbing the price tag of the shirt. "It's the money you're worrying about?" She scowled, I got ready for her to laugh at me, if it weren't for the sad look in her eyes. "I... I didn't even think. I'm sorry."

Great, now she was feeling bad for me being poor, How much damage could I do? "No, Rachel. It's fine. You didn't know. It's cool."

Rachel's somber look cleared, she lifted her head high again. "Hey, my parents gave me a huge fund to start, and with my first paycheck soon... It's on me." Rachel was practically beaming, pushing the shirt further into my abdomen.

"Rachel... I can't accept that, really." I tried to push it back, but she wouldn't let me, insisting further. "I asked you on a date, didn't I?" She brushed her fingers along her feather earring with a moment that seemed mechanical, like it had been done so many times that it was engraved in her muscles. "Let me do this for you."

I wanted to fight more, giving in so easily may have made it seem that I wanted that to happen, which I definitely did not, it was goddamn mortifying. But it didn't seem like Rachel was giving in any time soon, I forced out sharp air through my nostrils. "Fine. But I won't like it."

Rachel turned giddy. "Don't care." Her smile turning shit-eating. "Go on, keep searching."

I purposely let out a long sigh in protest, letting her know that I didn't like exploiting her like this, but I went along anyway. I plucked at various clothes, grabbing some and throwing away some others, all under the influence of Rachel.

Sneaking into the change rooms, I mixed and matched the clothes I had grabbed, strutting out like a model on a runway, for Rachel to be my judge.

I stepped out of the room. A black leather jacket, with that same elk skull with feathers. It reminded me of both Rachel and Max. The elk was my symbol for Max, she always had this weird fascination with deer. Wore a shirt with one on it all the time. The shirt felt like an embodiment of her friendship, something to clutch close.

The feathers, of course, were of my new friend. Rachel's earring dangling from her lobe, like those feathers dangled from the horns of the elk skull.

Rachel stared silently, a small smile creeping onto her face, pulling and pulling until it was so bright that I felt blinded. It was a pain that hurt, a burn that felt really good. I did a twirl effect to show off the outfit, ripped jeans and all.

"Perfect." Rachel said, once I had turned back to her. "Just goddamn perfect, Chloe."

My cheeks burned, I felt very happy under Rachel's praise, she knew just what to say to get me to smile, even though I just met her. I gave a brief smirk to the enigmatic girl before I hid in the changing room, putting my regular clothes back on and grabbing the pile of clothes that made the cut.

After our store-raid. Rachel insisted we talk over dinner. I refused because I really didn't want Rachel to be spending her money on me, but yet she was still dragging me off to some small place just south of the Ferris Wheel.

"Fun fact." Rachel started, sitting down at a table just outside the open entrance of the small eatery, there were no doors. How were they were supposed to stop robbers? Yeah, forgot that I asked that, I'm too stupid to know. "The first ever meal I had when I got to LA was at this place. It's great." She motioned for me to sit beside her at the table, so I did.

"So this place has gotten the Rachel Amber Seal Of Approval? Sounds like it's trustworthy, then." I smirked playfully at Rachel when she laughed. Goddamn her laugh was beautiful. I just wanted to listen to it all day, that sounded kinda creepy, how I said it...

Rachel barely glanced at the menu before she knew what she wanted, passing it off to me.

"Uh, you barely looked at it, dude. How do you know what you want?" I asked, dumbfounded as I flipped through the laminated menu, some decent variety in it.

Rachel chuckled. "Chloe, I've been here before, and I've seen the menu." Rachel tapped her finger against her temple. "And I've got a lasting memory." Her smile was infectious, I mirrored it. She then ordered a coffee when a man came along, I claimed I needed more time. We sat in an awkward silence for a few minutes, neither of us knew what to say.

"This place is like comfort food to me." Rachel thanked the waiter when he brought by a cup of coffee, she grabbed the cup gently and blew at the vapours that were rising from the cup. "It reminds me of when I first got here, when my dreams finally came true." Her words were dreamy, she looked distracted as she sipped at the coffee from the mug recoiling microscopically from the bite of the hot liquid.

"I wouldn't know the feeling." I responded, dampening the mood. "My dream is to get the hell out of here." I was aware of how much of a party pooper I was being, but it was in my nature to be an asshole, so I didn't let it stop me. "But surprising enough, I've never been to this little place, dad always had a favourite restaurant when we visited the pier." My voice wavered, enough to be noticeable, I could tell that Rachel could hear it, but she was kind enough to keep it to herself.

I ordered myself a small chicken sandwich when someone came by to take our orders, purposefully picking the cheapest item on the menu. I was serious when I told Rachel that I don't want to leech her money, so I was going to stick by it.

Rachel started to thumb at her earring as she sipped on her coffee, which by now should have cooled down. Why would she get coffee this late anyway? It's like 6 o'clock in the evening, maybe she just really likes coffee? Goddamn why am I fumbling? Is this what nervousness is?

"So." Rachel broke my thoughts, her smile beaming mischievously. "We're on a date, and I haven't learned anything about you. Tell me some stuff."

Um... stuff... stuff about me that was interesting? I didn't have much to say. Maybe I should lead with that? I cleared my throat despite nothing being stuck in it. Goddamn, I hated being nervous, it threw my whole game off.

"Stuff about me? There's nothing really to tell." I said, with surprising confidence that I had to congratulate myself. Keeping my cool around this girl was a task that seemed easy, but required an insane amount of self control.

Rachel gave me a sad look. "You're amazing, Chloe." Then her look turned smug, "plus, there's lots you can tell me. Just start simple."

Simple? I couldn't go any simpler than my name, which she already knew. I felt out of ideas, I almost wanted to throw the question back onto her, but that would make me look suspicious. So scrambled for small things that didn't involve how I was an orphan and poor for most of my life. It couldn't be that hard, I was sure.

"Um, my last name is Price." Rachel gave me a look, so I threw my hands up. "Hey, you didn't know that!" I defended, to which Rachel nodded in agreement, so I continued on. "I was an only child. Grew up in Beverly, a huge mansion house, because my mom was a ghostwriter for celebrities." Then I leaned into Rachel, like I was going to tell her a secret, she leaned in too. "A word of wisdom? They don't write their autobiographies. People like my mother do."

Rachel chuckled at my 'secret.' "Somehow, I'm not surprised." She said, amused as she sipped at her coffee.

"Tell me more, Price." Rachel had the voice of someone who always got what they wanted. And never for a second did I doubt that. She probably has unspeakable power over others. She felt like a spider (Sorry for the analogy, have no other way of describing it.) She entices people, bringing them closer, only to trap them into her web and feast on their blood. Though I doubt that Rachel drinks anyone's blood. Though you never know...

I felt myself getting sucked into her web as my sandwich and her pasta arrive,  but I didn't care, it was a very comfortable web. Her smile is bright and dangerous, willing me closer to her, if only I didn't have a chunk of chicken and salad in my mouth. I wipe off food from my lips and speak through a full mouth. "Once had straight A's in school. Passing with flying colors. But then I dropped out."

Dropped out, forcibly removed for being an orphan and having no parents to pay fees. Same thing, really.

It's not like the foster home I went to really helped. They believed in homeschooling. So I had even less excuses to leave that horrid place. So, sure, maybe I had some sort of education, but it wasn't any good of one. I didn't see any of the people that raised me have any sort of diploma.

My foster parents. Yikes, better not go anywhere near that. They weren't horrible, I guess. But they were not the best of parents either. I tried to spend a lot of time away from that house, wandering, buying pot from Frank, and scoping out my current house. the home I lived in wasn't very cramped, It was me, two parents, and another kid, who for the life of me, I couldn't remember his name. My 'Parents' wanted me to refer to him as a brother, but that was not happening, so I went with plenty of other things.

The second I left that goddamned place, I told them never to talk to me again, and said some very colourful words to the three of them, and apparently it did the trick, I haven't heard from them since, thank God.

Rachel smirked knowingly at me. "Too much of a bad girl for school?"

I felt a low shiver in my spine. Why did that turn me on? Egh, no time for questions, it just really turned me on. I sat back and tried to look as tough as possible, playing along. "You goddamn know it." Rachel laughed her infectious laugh and ate another bite of her pasta, I watched and didn't even touch my own plate, eating made me sick sometimes.

"Alright, alright. Enough about me." I broke my stare and drank some of the water sitting at the table. Blech, didn't taste like the plasticy water from the water bottles I was used to, I didn't know if that was a good thing, or not. "Your turn, superstar. Tell me about you."

Rachel's lips curl at the word 'Superstar.' But yet she starts her own Origin Story. "I was born in a tiny ass town on the coast of Portland in Oregon. Where everyone knew each other's name, and fishing was the main business."

"Yikes." I hiss with empathy. "I feel bad for you." Rachel nodded along, sipping from her cup. "That's why I wanted to get out of there the second I could." I didn't blame her, really... I sat attentively to let her know that I was ready for her to continue.

"My dad was the DA, one of the most important people in town, so that's why I have money." She picked at the skin on her fingers while she continued, sighing deeply. "Everyone knew me because of my dad. I was just 'The DA's Daughter' to everyone. They never tried to get to know me enough, to know that I'm more than that, you know?"

She was desperately seeking my validation, and I really hated it. She didn't need me-or anyone for that matter-to tell her who she was, she was a person, not a thing. I reached forward and grabbed her arm, she looked startled.

"Rachel. Who gives a shit about them?" I asked bluntly, my face heating in anger. But I really wasn't sure why I was mad. Maybe it was because I hated that someone this beautiful was being labelled so harshly. "You're your own person, Rachel. If those fuckers don't ever take the time to actually know you better, they don't deserve to be anywhere near you." I wanted to stop, abort and shut my fat mouth, but I really couldn't.

"I haven't known you for long..." I started, not sure where I was going for a second, but when I looked at Rachel, how she was looking at me with warm eyes, her cheeks carrying a light flush, I had the right idea. "I haven't known you for long, But you're special, Rachel. You're stunning, smart, hot. And you make me feel so many things. So who the hell cares who you were back then, now, you're someone special.

I mean hell, you're going to be a model in Los Angeles. You're the real deal." I start to feel out of breath, I went on a tangent over one small thing she told me, goddamn I am crazy for this girl, aren't I?

She does nothing, only stares, and that freaks me the fuck out. I wished she would say something. A compliment, or be freaked out by my sudden burst of emotion over one thing she said... I suddenly felt very stupid for dumping my guts out to this girl.

"Chloe." Her smile beams so bright it could blind anything. "That's... No one has ever said that to me. No one’s ever cared-" "Well they should." I insist, my hand still on top of hers on the table.

Her gaze softens, deep hazel eyes looking at me appreciatively. Thumb brushing my knuckles, she says. "Thank you, Chloe. Really."

We pick at the rest of our dinner, shedding the heavy stuff and making small talk about the shitty traffic in LA, the ridiculous amount of drunk people you can spot around the place at any time of day. Even when talking about random shit, Rachel is one of the most interesting people I know. She talks with her hands, making gestures with each statement. And her habit to touch the feather at her ear without thinking

Rachel pays the dinner tab, (And I have to begrudgingly watch) before we set off on our newest adventure. The sun was now a semi circle in the horizon, casting brilliant oranges and reds across the sky, it was very beautiful... And painful, I looked away and squeezed my eyes shut, preventing further harm.

Rachel taps her blue painted finger on her lip, catching me in a momentary trance, before I pulled myself out of it, I was quickly learning to defend myself against her. "I'm thinking..." Rachel paused for dramatic effect, taking her eyes off the horizon to look at me. "A ride on the good old Ferris Wheel."

Uh, yeah, no. Not happening.

I hated that fucker. It was old, and unreliable, and brought back childhood memories. And it was really tall. I gulped and tried to change her mind. "I... uh, don't know Rachel. The water is probably beautiful at this time, let's just go walk along the coastline or something."

Rachel caught my unease and smiled at it, snatching my wrist before yanking me towards the Wheel. 'Wowser' (To put it in Max's hippie term) This girl has one hell of a grip. Almost yanked my wrist out of its socket. Of course, the wheel had no line, since no one was here, so we got on immediately, save me having an outright protest about it.

After Rachel got me into the cart, and we started our ascent, I finally gave in, knowing that it was completely useless to fight it at that point, so I sulked as we rose higher.

Okay, I hated the wheel, but the view was goddamn gorgeous, a sight that I couldn't ignore, and with a girl like Rachel by my side, I felt completely safe on that wheel, safe for the first time in years.

My throat felt weird and my fingers tingled, I really needed a smoke... But with Rachel sitting beside me, I didn't think I could. I stared at her as she stared at the horizon, beautifully quiet, her face looked calm and at ease, it made me feel that way, too. Fuck it, I was gonna go for it.

Slowly, I pulled the weed joints out of my pocket, sealed in an airtight bag, so the smell couldn't get out, and have me busted. Max knew I smoked, she didn't really like it, but she knew. However, that wouldn't interfere with her job in having to fire me for it, so I figured it's best to keep them tucked away.

I unrolled the bag, opening the seal and letting that sweet smell of dope fill my nostrils, I felt my mouth water.

Beside me, Rachel could smell it too, she turned away from the view, to look at me with the bag, I held it up slightly. "Do you mind?" I asked gently, really hoping that she would let this one slide, I really needed to medicate myself, it had been over 24 hours since I did it last, and my edge had spiked severely.

"Um, actually, I do." Rachel frowned, and I felt my heart sink. Great, she probably thought I was a stoner, and no weed for me, how could this go worse?

But then, something glinted in her eyes. "You have to at least share." Rachel said, amusement dripping from her voice as she dipped her fingers into the bag, taking one of my pre-rolled joints, and gently placing it between her lips. God Damn, how could she get any hotter?

I grabbed my own and a lighter, sticking the joint in my mouth before using the lighter to start Rachel's cigarette off, then mine.

We both sat silenced for a minute, sucking toxic drugs, then blowing out the smoke in different rhythms. I allowed the drugs to pull me away, replace me with someone who's more at ease, and comfortable with the world, someone I'm not. I sighed out a puff of smoke and slumped against the back of the cart we were sitting in, watching the tip of my joint light up to match the color of the horizon, each time I inhaled.

I glanced over at Rachel, her body only an outline against the furious, yet warm colours of the sunset. She looked elegant, even when she was smoking dope on a Ferris Wheel with a stoner sitting beside her. She was so careful, bringing the cigarette to her lips and closing down on it, ever so gently, like the simplest of touches will break her joint. Then she brought in the smoke very slowly, savouring each inch of smoke violating her lungs. Then finally, she opened her mouth, and put a very light pressure behind her exhale, causing the smoke to slowly drift from her mouth and cloud around her.

My mind, which was already starting to get clouded, was mesmerized by her. How did I get so lucky?

After what seemed like forever, Rachel finally spoke. "The last few weeks have been rough, Chloe." Smoke shot out of her lips with each word, I watched it vanish into the air. "But, you're the best thing that's happened to me in so long. I know we met not long ago. But thank you, Chloe."

I felt flushed as I sat up again, leaning over the guardrail that kept us from falling from our deaths. We were stopped at the very top of the wheel. The bright colours of the horizon began to fade, red at the centre faded to orange, which shifted to a greenish blue, then a bright blue, and finally, the sky above us was a dark blue.

"I'm glad that I have you too, Rachel." I admit, closing my eyes and pulling in more toxic smoke, the toxicity that I craved so much. Rachel reached over and took my hand in hers, a warmth so comforting I'd almost prefer it over the drugs.

Almost.

I pulled in another drag of smoke as we watched the sun, still unmoving from the top of the wheel. Being with Rachel was so freeing, even when we weren't talking. Having her hand on mine, as the sun set before us, I felt so elated, and this time, I don't think it was because of the drugs.

"Can I admit something to you?" I asked quietly, building up the confidence to tell Rachel my true childhood story, now that I had drugs in my system. She nodded wordlessly, her eyes still along the horizon, hand curled in mine.

I took a deep breath, then two, willing the words come out, waiting for them to. I took an extra long drag, then finally knew what I was going to say.

"My dad died when I was a child, run over by a semi not far out of town." That caught Rachel's attention, she turned to me, a look of sadness and sympathy growing on her face, but I wasn't done. "Then my mom, she couldn't handle raising her husband's child, especially not alone, the memory of him on my face, so she left. Took off without a word, god knows where she is, or even if she's alive."

Damn, this was hard. But I needed to get this off my chest, to someone who mattered, not some shitty therapist. Rachel wordlessly squeezed my hand as I started back up again, after another toke of dope. "I was left to defend myself, and before I starved, I was taken to child services. I was brought to this home, with two parents who weren't mine, and a boy who was supposed to be my brother-as if-and I lived there for years.

"My foster parents were... Jeremy and Ciara, I think... Doesn't matter, I hated them. Pretending like they knew me, that they gave birth to me, I was almost sent away a few times, and I almost ran away the others." I felt out of breath, I took a few seconds to catch my breath, and tried to stop pouring my guts out. This girl, who was almost a stranger, was learning my entire life, but I couldn't stop, it felt so good to let all of this out.

"Finally, I reached the age that I could live on my own, and I couldn't leave any faster, I was finally free." I sighed, flicking the joint stub and watching it to the ground, while grabbing a fresh roll. "But, since those fuckers insisted on homeschooling me, I had a bare ass education, not even enough for college, and I was too ungrateful to accept much money from my foster place. So I live in the 'Low Income Area'" (Still refuse to call it 'Ghetto' or 'Hood', stupid names, if you ask me.) "A musty ass house that is barely holding itself together." I let out a self deprecating laugh. "I mean, hell. That place barely has running water and electricity most days, so I have to work at some diner to keep my shitty ass alive, and that's how I met you."

I was panting slightly by the time I was done, glad to finally let that off my chest, I felt lighter. But, when Rachel was silent for several long moments, weights were added, making me feel like I was sinking. After a final toke from her joint, she sighed, fully of sympathy. "Oh, Chloe..." She looked somehow hurt, eyes glinting painfully, her hand tightened impossibly more on mine.

"Thank you for being so open with me, Chloe. I know that must be hard." She sounded like she really meant it, taking her hand away from mine and shifting her body so she was almost laying on me, to envelop me in a hug. "Trust doesn't really come all that easy anymore." I agreed, reciprocating her hug. "But, I just feel like I can trust you, Rachel. With anything."

The girl pulled away, and my skin felt so cold without her. She rested herself inches from me, her face right close to mine, framed in the warm glow of the fading sunset behind us. Her body was now over top of mine, her lap testing just beside mine, neither of us spoke, breathed, moved for quite some time.

Finally, after a long time of deafening silence, Rachel Amber pressed her lips to mine.

Her lips were so soft, her body on mine, I kissed her back feeling lightheaded and delirious with pure ecstasy, it was so much better than any drug I could take. I pushed my fingers in her hair, we broke our kiss, then connected again. One kiss became two, then three, then five, I lost count.

We broke our seal to pull oxygen into our lungs, though I'd rather suffocate than stop kissing her. Rachel's lips were swollen and she licked what remained of the lipstick off of them. "How was that?" She asked, flashing her teeth in a wide smile.

I was at a loss for words. "W... wow..." I forced out, trying to get enough oxygen into my lungs for normal human function. Rachel laughed, thick with glee and affection, then she dipped down, our lips connected again.

And I never wanted that moment to end.


	6. Chapter 6

"Why are you smirking like that?" Beau asked, his arms crossed. I was suddenly brought back to the real world, the smells of the diner wafting around, quiet chatter and clanging cutlery, we were actually busy.

Did last night even happen? I'm positive it did, since I still have Rachel's lipstick, a faint smear on my neck. I still felt high from the feeling, the pure euphoria that Rachel gave off when we kissed. That, mixed with the joint I just smoked on my break. Oops.

I knew I promised myself never to smoke at work, I could get fired. But I needed, a burning fire in my gut wouldn't go away until I had the drugs to put it out.

"No reason, Beau." I leaned back against the counter, "I just want to smile." He wrinkled his nose, looking at me with an unhappy look. "Why do you smell so bad?" He asks, but I'm sure he always knows.

I gulped. Beau had a nose for weed and there was absolutely no doubt he could smell it on me. I braced myself for punishment, while he looked at me with a look of disappointment, like he was scolding his own child for doing something stupid. Which was fair, I guess. I acted like a child, and I was doing stupid shit. His jaw tightened as he inhaled once more. "One more strike, Chloe. Then I have to fire you. I don't want to, but those are the rules that have to be played."

I looked at the almost sad look in his eyes and nodded silently, I needed this job, as much as I didn't like it, to keep me alive. So I'd have to play by the rules.

I jumped as a little vibration pulled me away from what was happening. It was a phone, the old shitty one I bought just so I could text Rachel. I fished it out, and read the small display screen, a text from Rachel.

[From: Rachel]

(Work has been bullshit. Mind if I come by for a bite, if you're working?)

I flashed a smile at the old phone. Beau had gone off to do something or other, probably to do with his job, or whatever. I sent a text back rapid fire.

[From: Chloe]

(Come on over, not like I'm going anywhere :p)

Shit, maybe the tongue face was a little too needy, and maybe I should have wait a little bit before I responded, to not look like I was sitting by my phone, waiting for her to text. I mean, that's exactly what I was doing, but she doesn't need to know that.

My phone buzzed again a couple minutes later, I practically scrambled to answer it.

[From: Rachel]

(Hey. No emoji!!)

[From: Chloe]

(What? Why not?)

[From: Rachel]

(Because they're stupid and overused)

[From: Chloe]

(Exactly, the perfect definition of me)

Rachel didn't answer for a few minutes, I chewed my lip and refilled someone's coffee when Beau urged me to work, finally, Rachel shot a text back.

[From: Rachel]

(No, Chloe. You're not overused, you're a person, a person who's important to me.)

I felt my heart skip a beat or two, no one has expressed how important I am to them. Besides Max, but she didn't really count, she's more like my overprotective mother than my friend.

"What are you smiling at your phone about, Chloe?" Speaking of Max, her girlfriend, Kate Marsh snapped me out of my trance. I forgot that Max brought her to work today, for some reason or another. I only met Kate a couple times, but she's a very nice person, her hair was tied up in a bun, and golden crucifix necklace dangling over her chest.

I snapped my attention upwards to her, stuffing the phone into my pocket. I sometimes wonder how the two of them found love so quickly, both 18 and madly in love, while I have been bouncing around aimlessly my whole life.

"Nothin, just thought of a funny joke." I lied through my teeth. It was nothing against Kate, I just didn't want anyone to know yet, and Kate might tell Max if I told her.

Kate is smarter than me though, she gives off a knowing smile-a smirk?-and tries again. "Chloe, you can tell me, if it's anything secret, sometimes it's important to get things off your chest, so they don't stay bottled up inside and hurt you later." Her smile was warm, it could melt any kind of ice. I sighed, there was no way I was getting past her, was I?

"I had a date yesterday. It went really well. I think we hit it off." I smiled just thinking about it, her smile, how the smoke slowly leaked out of Rachel's mouth as she let it out, her soft lips on mine... Kate almost looked confused. "Why be worried about that then, if you and him hit it off really well." She questioned, playing with the crucifix on her chest, I vaguely noticed the ring on her finger, an abstinence ring. Poor Maxie, having to wait... I wouldn't be able to hold myself back that much, as my past records have shown.

"That's... um... the point." I mumbled, scratching at the back of my neck and avoiding eye contact with Kate, who was looking very puzzled. "It's... not... a he..."

Kate's expression twisted from being confused to knowing everything, she smiled. "Oh, Chloe. That's great." She sounded somehow proud, like a second mother. Great, do I have both of them as parental figures now? I sighed. "Just don't tell Max, okay? I haven't found out a way to say it to her."

Kate looked at me with the same look she always has, like she's calm and happy, somehow constantly. "You don't need to hide this from her, okay? She would be proud of you." Kate touched my hand, a calming gesture that I embraced. "I know, thank you." I responded, carefully moving  my hand back to my side when she pulled away.

"Just don't wait too long, Chloe." Kate smiled, before she retreated into the kitchen, where Max was working. I checked the cheap phone one more time before getting back to my stupid job. Nathan showed up before Rachel did, greeting Beau and flipping his apron on. Something really caught my eye. He looked tired, and there was a ghost of a bruise on his cheek. Had Nathan gotten into a fight?

It seemed unlikely, because his tame nature, but that bruise certainly wasn't a hickey, too big, too.... forced to be one. I felt my gut twist, where had it come from? I wanted to ask, but Nathan and I weren't really 'close' and I tried to avoid talking to him whenever possible.

I let it go, whatever it was. Didn't look serious, and it was the first time I ever saw it, maybe a one time thing.

Rachel didn't show up for what felt like a long time, but was only a few minutes. She was wearing a kickass torn flannel again, her hair tied back into a ponytail, hazel eyes scanning the diner before landing on me, in my dusty ass diner outfit. I felt embarrassed about every single crevice of myself in that moment.

She didn't come to greet me, instead, sat down at a booth, and made herself comfortable. I stared for a moment, remembering the previous night, and how her mouth tasted. The memories immobilize me for a moment, making me unable to find my way over to Rachel. Out of the corner of my eye, Nathan scurried into the bathroom.

My sense of confidence slowly rebuilt itself and I finally walked over to Rachel's booth, she stopped me before I poured her some coffee. "Why if it isn't the super model, how kind of you to join us, Mrs. Amber."

Rachel seemed stressed, but she still let out a chuckle, a weak one, but she was still willing to play along despite. I wanted to sit with her, but the diner was too busy to be able to have any time off, maybe if no one was looking, I could talk with Rachel for just a few minutes?

I scanned left and right, but the only person watching was Kate. She looked between the two of us, and seemed to know what was going on, she nodded and gave me a good natured wink. I let a breath out and slumped into the seat, opposite side of Rachel and snatched her unused mug, pouring coffee for myself.

Rachel looked tired, her eyelids weighted as she looked up at me. "Hey, Chloe." Was all she said, sounding gloomy. It really hurt to see Rachel like this, all upset and shit, I sighed. "Rach, what's up?"

Something about using a nickname cheered Rachel up, or maybe it was because I was asking her. She sat up and let out a long breath. "Starting out this modeling stuff is getting tiring, getting gig after gig, moving all around, it's all a lot to handle." It seemed like something I'd be fine with, really. The busier with your job you are, the more income you receive, sounds like the life, really. But Rachel didn't seem to think the same, she looked as if she was going to fall asleep any minute, I slid my mug to her and this time, she actually drank the coffee before sliding it back.

Her mood shifted, a small smile cracking her face. "But last night was amazing." I could see the sparkle in her eye when she just thought about it.

"Last night was great." I agreed with a smile, Rachel grabbed my hand, placing it in hers. "So this means we're... together, right?" I asked with uncertainty, watching as Rachel fidgeted with my fingers, weaving them between hers. "Yes, Chloe. We are together."

I felt heat blow up on my face. My fingers tingled and I wiggled them in her fingers. Rachel took my wrist and brought it to her lips and kissed the outside of my wrist, her lips light and careful on the skin.

All I wanted to do was kiss her. Her big soft lips, beautiful hazel eyes gazing into mine, holding secrets. I decided to keep my lips to myself, at least, while we were in the diner. I tried to distract myself. "Can I get you anything to eat?"

Rachel gave me a smile. "A sandwich? I don't care what kind, I'm starving." She took my mug and drank the coffee yet again. Licking the drink off her lips while my eyes watched her tongue, she could tell I was looking, but chose not to acknowledge it.

I leaned back and hollered to the kitchen, to anyone that would hear me. "Get me a chicken sandwich, fast!"

Rachel beside me shook her head, at first I wasn't sure why. But then I recovered. "Scratch that, a veggie sandwich!" Rachel then nodded in approval. "Once we eat, I need some air, I've had a hell of a day." She sighed, rubbing slender fingers against her temple.

"Then you and I can take a walk." I offered, sliding back into my seat. "Lots of people here anyway, it's not like anyone will notice that I'm gone."

Rachel frowned, but didn't reply.

We lapsed into silence, so I tried to break it. "Tell me more about what you're doing with your job." Rachel automatically sat up, her face lighting up a little in excitement, I could tell that she was aching for someone to ask.

"Modelling is harder than people say it is." She explained, twirling her hair around a finger. "I did a photoshoot yesterday for a magazine, which was a few hours long. Then my agency got me another shoot for a clothing line, hours of trying shit on and posing in them, just to have it not work and take it off again." Rachel paused to take some air, sipping on the coffee that I just gave up for her. Then continued.

"Then I got a call that the magazine shoot that I had done was scrapped. And I have three interviews on Monday, one Wednesday, and a shoot for another clothing company." She let out a deep breath and closed her eyes, shooting hard jets of air from her nose. I could almost feel the stress leaking from her as we talked. Feeling empathetic, I squeezed her hand reassuringly.

"Rachel, that's good. It means you're popular, getting gigs, you'll be famous in no time." I tried to sound reassuring, but I'm sure that I didn't. Rachel, however, nodded. "Thanks Chloe, I'm glad you think so." I felt moved by how she took my compliments, usually I don't get this far, I wanted to keep it going. "Think? I know, Rachel."

Her smile was so warm, she returned my squeeze and kissed my wrist, undoubtedly making a blush creep up my neck. I was so lucky to have Rachel in my life now, the way she smiled at me, I never had anyone like that before. I had always seen Max and Kate, other couples that came into the diner, and showed way too much PDA. And as much as I had told myself I didn't need that, that I was fine with my short flings and one night stands, I always felt empty. There was a hole in my chest that only drugs could fix.

But Rachel would be my drug now, the thing that filled the hole in my life, the gaping pit that I was always positive would never be sealed, maybe it would, and Maybe this girl was the key to the whole thing. Without caring if Max, or Beau, or anyone was watching, I leaned over the table and pressed my lips into Rachel's, my hand squeezing into hers from, the added pressure.

Her lips felt amazing, soft and beautiful against mine, we traded saliva for a moment, our lips syncing together, before I reluctantly pulled back, pure euphoria pulsed thought my veins. Rachel had the most pure feeling of affection in her eyes, hazel irises locking onto mine, and I swore Rachel Amber was better than any drug I would ever smoke.

"Thank you." I said, like a dumbass. I didn't know what else to say, this girl made me tongue tied. She let out a pure laugh that dripped like honey, her eyes sparkling bright. Heat creeped at my cheeks when I sat back down, our hands separating. As Rachel sat across from me, bathed in sunlight from the window, a thought hit me. If she was so busy with work, when would her and I have any time to be together?

I didn't want to ask her, and be an asshole, but the idea churned my stomach, and allowed that hollow hole in my chest to open back up again, I really needed to know.

"Rachel." My voice cracked like a teenage boy's. I cleared my throat and scratched my neck, trying to word my question to make myself not look like a complete asshole, but I knew that wasn't happening. "If you're so busy, when can you and I find time to hang out?" I felt like a selfish brat, but I really wanted to know, in case I needed more drugs to keep myself company.

Rachel scowled, crossing her arms and leaning back into the booth, the line of stress on her forehead scrunching up again. Great, I made her upset, way to go, asshole. "I don't know, Chloe. Let me figure it out." Her tone was sharp and angry, letting me know that the topic was closed for discussion. I shut my big fat mouth, and we both fell into silence again.

Later, Kate brought by Rachel's sandwich, intentionally I'm sure, and glanced at me as she set it down, a warm smile on her face. She shifted over to look at Rachel. "Hi, I'm Kate." Her smile was warm and accepting, its default setting. "A friend of Chloe."

I sighed silently and watched the two shake hands, Rachel introducing herself. She looked perfect, like there was no possible way she could ever be stressed in the world. As soon as Kate left, Rachel returns to her tired state. She looked completely weighed down, like acting okay in front someone drained her even more. How much did she have to act like this? It almost felt painful.

"Your friend is... nice." Rachel tried to be kind, but she just sounded confused.

"I... I guess." I replied, still staring at her stupidly. "Definitely nicer than me, everyone is." I cracked a self deprecating joke at myself, maybe to light the mood, but nada. Rachel just frowned at me and didn't reply.

My asshole levels were feeling extreme, I watched Rachel eat her sandwich, too scared to say anything and fuck up any more. When Rachel finished her food, she sighed. "I'm sorry Chloe. There's just so much going on and I'm trying to-"

"Don't explain yourself to me, Rachel." I intervened, stopping her from apologizing when I was really the one at fault. "I get you’re stressed, and you don't need me to muck around in your personal life." Sighing, I took her hand again, squeezing it in mine to show my point. Rachel nodded, and wiped her face with a napkin. "Wanna get out of here? I really could use a walk right now."

I had to work, but at this point, Rachel needed me, and I could handle the punishments of skipping. Max wouldn't be that mad if I ditched for the sake of love, right?

Heh, love. Not sure I can say something like that, towards a person I've known for less than a week, even if my feelings towards her are undoubtedly strong. I nodded to Rachel and stood, shedding my apron and placing it on the booth, trying to sneak back into the kitchen to hang it up could get me caught.

Rachel looked pleased, standing up and sliding a 20 bill underneath her plate, a really generous tip, considering the diner. This time, I took Rachel's hand, and we walked out together. It was colder today than it usually was, there was a strong wind gust that occasionally blew by and chilled me to the bone.

Rachel noticed this, and pressed herself closer to me, huddling for warmth, I smiled at the smaller girl, and started to walk along the sand, over towards the street. "So, you didn't by chance bring a car here, did you?" I asked, lightheartedly, despite the fact that I couldn't feel my fingers.

"I did." Rachel confirmed, running a finger along my quickly numbing arm. "But that's no fun, I wanna walk some." She smirked playfully, leaning further into my arm for support. I grunted, this freezing cold wouldn't be very fun.

After Rachel and I got away from the water, and onto the sidewalk, it definitely got warmer, but I was still shivering. Rachel and I walked for a little while, trading experiences about our lives in LA so far. "Wow, you really saw some dude, just naked?" Rachel was taken back as I told her the story of when I ran into a guy who was sitting in a back alley, naked as he did drugs. I nodded and laughed bitterly to myself. "Buck. Ass. Naked."

Rachel still clutched to my arm as we walked wobbly along the sidewalk, she sighed affectionately. "This place is crazy." She leaned her head on my shoulder silently, breathing deeply as we walked, I smiled to myself when I felt her chest heave with careful breaths.

"Goddamn nuts." I agreed silently, nodding to myself. Maybe that's why I lived in LA, because I was as crazy as the town, we fit each other, a crazy girl living in a crazy town.

"Okay, now I'm getting cold." I felt a tremor ripple through Rachel as she uttered that out, through chattering teeth. And as much as I loved chatting with Rachel, I was starting to lose the feeling in my body too, I let a shiver ripple my muscles before I agreed. "Yeah, let's get the hell out of here. Can you take us to your car?"

Rachel nodded quietly, redirecting us back towards the beach. Her car was simple, white, Toyota, maybe? She climbed in and I sat in the passenger seat. It was a comfy car, black padded seats, slick design, it definitely wasn't cheap, but it was no Ferrari, either. 

Being in a car freaked me out, I haven't really been able to have one, and cars just made me think of my dad, and how he got splatted by a fucking car. I gulped down my nerves and fought with the seat belt, struggling to get it clipped. Rachel watched in amusement while I fought with the stupid belt, I always hated the damn things. "Where to, Price?" She asked, slipping keys in the ignition.

"I have nowhere to go." I said uselessly, slumping against the seat, goddamn this was comfortable, even more so than my own mattress. Rachel pondered for a second, hesitation in her eyes, before carefully posing, "how about your place?"

My body's immediate reaction was to resist, I shook my head. "No way, my place isn't worth checking out." I tried to convince her, not even I liked my own house, so why would I want to take her there?

"Chloe." Rachel sighed, she left the keys in the ignition and let the heat fill up in the car, rubbing her cold fingers together. "You opened up to me yesterday, and I really thank you for that." She seemed to lose her train of thought, gripping the steering wheel while she looked for the lost words. "You don't need to hide these things from me, who cares if your poor, Chloe? I'm into you for you, not any sort of wealth, or trait." She sounded like a cheesy romantic movie, but it really did make me feel better, I puffed out in defeat.

Rachel took that compliance and put the car into gear, backing out of her parking space. "What's the address?" She asked, flipping gears on the car and starting down the boulevard. I muttered out the address to her, then looked out the window, heart thumping so hard I felt it would tear the skin above it. All of the possibilities of Rachel's reactions when seeing my house flooded into my mind.

She might laugh, run away, or pretend she's okay with it and have this look of disgust in her eye that tells me otherwise. Or worse, she would pity me. Goddamn I hated people's pity. Pity is something that people who are better than you have the luxury of feeling towards you, it shows that you're weak, and you're not as good as anyone else. I hated pity.

After some navigation, Rachel and I pulled up to my house, the old and shitty mold box that I was unfortunately living in. I undid the seat belt and got out of the car, feeling the weight of dread sink in my stomach, the same one that I feel each time I enter this place. 

Rachel soon followed me out of the car, staring silently at the old house that I sadly lived in, she didn't speak for a while, I could already feel the pity seeping from her. I unlocked the door, and had to kick the damn thing just to get it open. The strong smell of must hit me when I stepped inside. "Welcome to the house of shit." I sighed, plopping my house key down on a splintered wooden counter and walking down the main hall of the house.

I could still smell a faint smell of dead rat, when that fucker died in my house days ago, I bet that was really comforting for Rachel, who followed me through the house with her nose wrinkled lightly. Once I reached my bedroom, I sat down on my mattress. Which, unlike a normal bed, it was just a single mattress laying on the floor, no frame or anything.

I laid myself out of the lumpy mattress, feeling the weight and stress on my back release all at once, causing a slow pain to seethe through my muscles. I glanced over at Rachel, who looked around the shitty room sadly. She leaned over and flicked on the light switch, and found herself surprised when it didn't work.

Great, the power is out again.

"Chloe...?" She started, looking for an explanation, and I guess I had to give one to her. "Runnin' a little short on dough, they musta' cut the bill or something." I replied nonchalantly, as if it wasn't a big deal, when I was actually feeling sore inside. Man I needed some drugs. Without thinking, I pulled a joint out of my pocket and lit it, the movement came natural to me, since I had been doing it for years.

Rachel puffed out breath from her nose, a very pitiful sigh that made my stomach twist, the last thing I needed was pity from the girl I thought I could trust. "Chloe-"

"I don't want to hear it." I cut her off harshly, before she could continue any longer. "I'm serious, Rachel. Please don't." The joint at my lips glowed with heat, a fire that burned passionately when I started to suck the drugs out of my small joint.

Rachel shook her head, and carefully chose how she wanted to tackle the subject again.  "I don't like that you're living like this." She said finally, sighing like the right words didn't come out. I sighed too. "it's not like there's anything you can do, Rachel."

Her face slowly lit up, which really freaked me out, she looked like she had a plan, one that I probably wouldn't agree with. "But I can Chloe. My apartment has several bedrooms. Come stay with me for a while."

Yep, wouldn't agree with it.

"You crazy, Rachel?" I said, maybe a little harsher than I intended, but still harsh enough. "Live with you? I just met you." She was crazy. Rachel was letting this girl that she barely knew, live in her house, she had no idea what kind of person I could be, and vice versa.

"It's not like we will be sleeping in the same bed." Rachel countered, shifting her weight against the wall behind her. "Think of it like being college roommates or something." She argued, obviously annoyed that she wasn't getting what she wanted. But I couldn't argue with her there, the idea of living with someone that I only semi knew made me uncomfortable, it was better than this dump.

I was defeated. "T... Then yeah." I agreed, puffing out a cloud of weed smoke. "Let's do it."

Rachel's smile was side and happy, she had won the argument, and I was going to live at her place. Part of me was definitely happy that I was going to be leaving this dump. But the other part is nervous about the idea of living anywhere but here, the place that has kept my back sheltered for a year, the move sounded exciting, in a nervous way.

"Well then." Rachel's triumphant smirk was warm. "Let's get you packed."


	7. Chapter 7

There wasn't really much to pack from my house, Rachel and I finished relatively early. Her small Toyota fit all of my shit no problem, and we jet setted off to her place. I still felt a little uncomfortable as we rode in her car, shuffling in my seat. Living with someone I didn't know all that well still scared me, despite Rachel being an awesome person (so far.) But I'm willing to give it a chance.

"I have a guest bedroom at my apartment, and two separate bathrooms." Rachel said, I would have interpreted it as a brag, if her tone wasn't gentle and reassuring. "So we won't be invading each other's privacy at all."

I appreciated her concern in making me feel comfortable, this was a big step for me, I could just imagine what my dad would say. 'Act like a proper guest, Chloe, be kind.' He was always pushing for me to be a kind person, but was never disappointed when I wasn't.

We rolled up to Rachel's apartment building, it was a large complex on the outskirts of LA, a sleek and comfortable looking building, I was scared to go in there, 'cause I may get the place all dirty with my poor person hands.

Rachel got out of the car and I followed, stretching my legs, as we had been driving for a while, held up in traffic. We popped the trunk of the car and grabbed my things, which were thrown in plastic bags, or cardboard boxes that were laying around my place, for reasons I couldn't remember for the life of me.

All of my stuff could be carried up in one load between the two of us, we had to cram into the elevator so we wouldn't have to take several trips up the stairs. Rachel was carrying a majority of my stuff, no matter how much I fought with her, she insisted that she carry a big load, and she was a stubborn girl.

Rachel pressed the 4th floor button, which was probably the floor that she was on, and we watched the doors close. "You should sell your place, Chloe. You could get a lot of cash from it." She offered, setting a box of my shit on the floor, assorted clothes, so it may have been heavy.

She wanted me to sell my place? The only safe haven I've had from that stupid foster home? I mean, yeah, I hated living in that rotted house, but it was the only house that I lived in independently, it was my first milestone into adulthood. (Besides getting my V-Card stamped.)

I was a little low on cash, however, maybe having a little more could get me a better job? Because being in Los Angeles means you have to be rich. The house wouldn't get me too much, a couple thousand, maybe. But that was more than I made in a year, so I could probably take it, though I wasn't sure, what if this arrangement with Rachel falls through, and I've already gone through with selling the place? Then I'd be fucked all over again.

"I'm not sure if that's a great idea yet, Rachel." I sighed, watching the elevator climb up achingly slow. I could tell that Rachel was disappointed in me, but I didn't want to treat this situation like it was a one time thing for me. I'm still getting used to it. I mean, one second I'm showing Rachel my place, then the next she's convinced me to move in with her?

"Why not, Chloe?" She asked, her tone lacking any kind of sharp tone that her words would imply. "Even if this whole arrangement doesn't work out, you could still use the money that you got from selling the house towards getting another." Rachel fixed her loose hair behind her ear. "Plus, when you put money in the bank, they actually pay you a percentage of it back. As, like, a thank you for using the bank."

Wait, shit. Did they really do that? Goddamn that would be helpful towards my whole problem. My mind started to weigh the pros and cons while I watched Rachel turn her earring over in her fingers. My stomach felt queasy with the steady moving of the elevator. Why was this fucking thing so slow?

"You don't have to decide now, Chloe." Rachel added, noting my unease towards the situation. "It was just a suggestion, that money could help put you in college, and work on getting a better job." She added, gearing up for the elevator doors to open.

I didn't like to admit this, but maybe Rachel was right, getting the cash from selling that place could really put me on the right track, on my way to setting my life back to normal. I gave her a short nod. "You're right." Rachel seemed pleased, offering me an open mouthed smile. "When am I never?"

I laughed. "Let me think about it."

The elevator doors shifted open, letting in a cool breeze that shook me to my core. Rachel and I both picked up our respective boxes, and I followed the aspiring model down the hall. "You've got all the time in the world, Chloe." Rachel responded, wedging one of the boxes between her thigh and the wall while she fished in her pocket for her apartment keys.

I felt like an idiot standing there and watching, but soon she picked out the keys and shoved them in the lock, twisting until she got the doorknob to comply and open. I shuffled the weight of the boxes in my arms, the muscles burning while trying to keep hold of all the weight, also, with eagerness to see where Rachel Amber lived.

When I stepped in, I was simultaneously shocked, and not surprised at the same time. The foyer was a small room to kick off your shoes and hang up your coats 'n such. But once we stepped further inside, I was completely taken away.

We stepped into a large room, a living room, kitchen, and dining room all stuffed into one in a way that didn't looked crammed or uncomfortable. The only colors in the entire apartment were grey, black and white, but it didn't seem dark and drab. Quite the opposite, actually. The warm grey walls complemented the white furniture and black trim. The kitchen counter was a grey and white swirled marble, smooth and cold to the touch.

There were two patio doors that led outside, I couldn't see much from where I was standing inside, but I could see that the small patio had a railing and a table, Rachel probably spent her time smoking out there, or drinking, it seemed like the perfect place to toke up and forget your strife. 

I set my boxes down to explore, Rachel chuckled softly and let me wander around. There was a step downwards from the kitchen and dining table hardwood floor to the living room carpet, a silver grey silky looking fabric that I really wanted to lay in. This place looked about a thousand times better than my shitty old house, and it even had a sleeker feeling than my old home. I looked at the white couch, a color that was so bright it made my eyes sting, and above it rested a map.

It was a star map, with the constellations and their respective names below. Capricorn, Aquarius, Pisces, (that's me!) Aries, Taurus, Gemini, Cancer, Leo (which was circled, maybe it was Rachel's?) Virgo, Libra, Scorpio, and Sagittarius. It was a big poster, taking up a lot of the wall behind the couch, with a couple small papers with coordinates beneath each star sign. Man, I didn't know that Rachel was so into star signs.

"My dad would always show me the stars." Rachel was standing behind me suddenly, looking at the star map with intense admiration. "When we were close. He had a telescope and we would sit out for hours, watching the stars and identifying the signs." She sighed with the weight of the memory. "I've always liked how the signs are a reflection of you, like a little piece of you in the sky."

I looked over at her, obviously these signs had a deeper meaning for her than they did for me, they carried the memories of a simpler time, with her and her dad. I looked back up at the map again, each constellation meaning something else, how they represented people, something I couldn't place pricked at my heart, so I grabbed my boxes to pull my mind away from the map before I started to contemplate my entire life choices, too.

I couldn't imagine living in a place like this all by myself, it felt too big, but too small all at the same time, I could spot three doors, two were left untouched, plain white doors that led to god knows where, and the third was decorated. The Leo constellation sign was put on it, with a marker no doubt, that was probably Rachel's room, so the others were...?

Maybe a guest room, since Rachel said that she had the one, and the first door must be a bathroom.

Rachel directed me to the guest room, across the kitchen from hers. I had to push open the door, since she was carrying a bigger load than me. It was an awesome room, carpeted, with a comfy looking bed (with a frame and everything!) With closet space, and a light bulb that actually worked. I could honestly live in here, if there was a kitchen and toilet, but that was just outside the door.

I felt like I was a little kid again, living in my fancy home with mom and dad, no care could be given. I slammed myself against the bed, rolling around on the soft material. I could tell Rachel was watching me, but I didn't care, this shit was too amazing to stop.

This feeling swirled in my gut, the best feelings I've felt in a long time, in years. Rachel set her boxes on the ground, and sat on the bed, right beside my head. I swiveled my neck to look at her, she was staring down at me, her eyes affectionate. I couldn't help myself, I leaned up and pressed my lips to hers, savoring the taste of her lips.

We stayed lip locked for a while, my hand went to rest on her cheek carefully, and her fingers rested on my sides. I shifted to get myself comfortable, resting my head in her lap without separating from her. We kissed and kissed and kissed again, I got lost in the perfect curl of her lips, how they were smooth and the cherry flavored lipstick transferred onto my lips. I had never felt more alive than I did in that moment, finally with someone who cared, who didn't judge.

Rachel returned my passion with some of her own, pure heat radiated off of her, we let our lips tangle together, forgetting our worries and memorizing each other on a deeper level

We broke with a gasp of air, both of us exhausted and empty from the lack of air, but I didn't care, my mind clouded with lust. All I could hear was our heavy breathing, in tandem. I forgot why we even started doing that in the first place, but I laid and silently watched Rachel catch her breath, I didn't care, I just wanted to do it again, and again.

Finally, however, Rachel stood back up, wiping her swollen lips on her sleeve and walking to my discarded boxes. "That was amazing, But we need to start unpacking now." I got up and helped her, grabbing a plastic bag with my underwear in it. Rachel grabbed a box with some of my bigger things, shirts, pants. It's not like there were many items of clothing in there, since the box was half empty, but Rachel took up the folded clothes and walked to the bed and spread them out.

"This is your shit." Rachel said with a smile. "So I'll unpack everything, but you gotta put it away." She smirked playfully, and I followed along.

While Rachel placed my clothes on my bed, I put them away, either in the fresh, unused dresser, or the closet which had a surprising amount of space. It all felt too surreal to me, I was finally away from that hellhole house, and I was somewhere safe, with Rachel Amber, the most beautiful girl I ever met.

I just wanted to kiss Rachel for being so nice to me, for letting my ungrateful ass into her house, letting me live there with her, but hadn't I already just done that?

"I... I don't know how to repay you for this, Rachel." I sputtered, while grabbing an unused coat hanger and sliding one of my tank tops onto it, before sloppily placing it back onto the pole with the others. Rachel laughed from behind me, grabbing a bag of my weed and placing it onto the dresser beside my bed, which was starting to get full of my possessions and trinkets, like an empty shotgun shell I once found laying around.

"Just keep scoring us some good weed, and I'll let you stay." She joked, folding up a now emptied box. I smirked at her. "Deal, Amber." 

Rachel chuckled as she continued her work, emptying all of the boxes and bags, (there weren't many to empty) once she finished, she sat back and watched me unpack the rest of my stuff into the dresser.

Once all the hard work was done, Rachel and I both go to her living room-Our living room?-and Rachel put on the tv. Some weird game show shit was playing and neither of us really cared what was going on, so we left it like that.

"Thank you for this, Rachel." I sighed when she pressed her head to my shoulder. "You really didn't have to help me, but you did. So I owe you." Rachel's hand had found its way to my stomach, lightly resting on my abdomen. The feeling was a warm one, a feeling that I invited. I placed my hand on top of hers.

Rachel's lips curled as she intertwined our fingers. "You owe me nothing, Chloe. I wanted to do this, you're my girlfriend." 

The word sent needles into my stomach. 'Girlfriend' was such a serious label that I never gave out, or received before, it felt fragile, like glass. My stomach did a few flips when I kissed her head. "Girlfriend. So serious, I like that." I said, playfully.

"Serious?" Rachel laughed, "what's so serious about it?"

I regretted saying that. She probably thinks I'm nuts now, did normal people give those labels out regularly? "I... Um. I just never really used those kinds of labels." I admitted, hanging my head in shame. 

"Never at all?" Rachel asked, putting her free hand on my chin and pushing my face up to meet hers. I shook my head slowly, shameful about my past romantic experiences for once in my life. Rachel moved the hand on my chin, to my clavicle, the other still heating my abdomen. "Well, we don't have to use them, if you don't want."

I sat up straighter. "I do want to use them, Rachel." I looked her dead in her eyes, pools of Hazel intently looking back. "My girlfriend." I smiled when the word came out, Rachel did too. She leaned forward and captured my lips again.

I could really get used to this, being with this girl, kissing her over and over again.

But, I could feel my pocket vibrating, buzzing once, twice, thrice. I grabbed the shitty phone out of my pocket and checked it. The messages were from Max. "Shit." I mumbled, trying to navigate the weird layout of the phone to get to her messages.

"What? What is it?" Rachel asked, alarmed. Quickly sitting up, her hand abandoning my stomach and leaving the skin underneath the fabric cold. I flicked through the phone still, finally getting the messages to display.

[From: Max]

(Chloe? Where are you?)

(Chloe, did you ditch work?)

(I don't want to punish you Chloe, but I'm going to have to.)

I let out a gulp, closing the phone down without replying. Beside me, Rachel still seems concerned. "It was Max. My boss." I explain, sighing. "She knows I'm not at work, she's mad."

Rachel looked guilty. "I shouldn't have dragged you along with me, I was selfish and I just wanted company. I..." That was unfair, Rachel shouldn't be punishing herself because of me. I was the one who made that choice. "Rachel." I interrupted, sitting up straight. "It was my choice, let me deal with it."

Reluctantly, Rachel nodded. She sat back into the couch and I groaned. Max was going to kill me.

"What should we do?" Rachel asked, chewing the inside of her cheek. I felt my nerves boil too, there was no way I could just go back and show up, my shift was way over and appearing again would set Max off, I would just go tomorrow and apologize. "Nothing today."

Rachel nodded, we stared at each other for a long time, I hated the guilt on Rachel's face, but there was nothing I could do today. Coiled up nerves in my stomach made it feel hollow. Or, maybe that could be hunger? I really haven't properly eaten in a long while.

We needed high spirits, and I was starving. So I let a smirk break my face and I stood. "Come on, let me treat you to dinner." I smiled confidently. Rachel seemed confused, staring at me with a dumbfounded look before she recovers. "Take me out to dinner? I thought you couldn't afford that."

The comment kind of stung, but I knew that Rachel meant nothing mean behind it, so I shook the comment off. "Come with me, I have the perfect dinner plan." I had been saving up a little, I didn't have a lot, but enough for at least some sort of repayment.

Rachel stood and grabbed for her car keys, but I stopped her with the wave of my palm. "Walking distance." I explained, when Rachel looked confused. She curtly nodded and grabbed her apartment key, before we left the room.

I refused to tell Rachel where we were going, even as we descended the elevator. I knew that the place I planned to take her wasn't flattering, or fancy either, but I was counting on my irresistible charm to woo her more than my planned location. I wasn't a very rich girl, so this would have to do.

"Come on, Chloe!" Rachel whined, tugging at my arm like a little child. "Tell me where you are taking me." Her demands were adorable, they almost made me want to break and give up my secrets, but she wasn't getting to me that easy.

"It's a secret." I tug on her arm in turn, which was laced with mine. I wasn't going to break that easy, we were getting closer to the destination and loved how pent up Rachel was about my surprise.

Soon, the glowing neon sign lit up my face when we reached the destination, Rachel's face twisted into amusement. "McDonald's?" She laughs out, smirking up at the big 'M' sign above our head.

"Yes indeed." I say with charisma, pushing open the front doors for her. "After you?" I could feel my smirk intensify as she stepped forward. "How kind of you." Rachel plaid along, shuffling in.

Once I got myself inside, I was almost surprised by how empty the place was, usually it was crawling with people. But there were only a few people in the building. Rachel followed me to the front counter, and watched me as I put in an order. One burger and medium fries, with a drink of course, my favorite meal of all time.

Rachel ordered just fries and a drink instead, she probably hasn't come to a McDonald's since she was a child, and only a master, who's been eating McDonald's as religiously as I have can master the coats of grease and oil on the food, Rachel made the right choice.

"To go, please." I specified to the middle aged woman taking our order, Rachel looked at me funny, but I tried not to dwell on it. After our grease covered food bag arrived, Rachel and I filled up our drinks, she got Diet Pepsi, but I'm more of a Root Beer gal.

"Where do we sit, Madam?" Rachel asked teasingly wiggling her eyebrows to enhance the effect. I scanned the small restaurant, there was barely anyone there, but it still didn't feel that private, not as private as I wanted it to. "Come with me." I smiled, taking her wrist and pulling her out of the building this time. Rachel lets out a surprised squeal which turned into laughter as I pulled her onto the street.

I pulled her up the hill and on the way out of town, we pass her apartment building, and by then she turned confused, unaware of where I was taking her.

We left the boundaries of Los Angeles, walking a bit further until we reached my small paradise , a shitty old junkyard on the out of town. Rachel seemed reluctant to go in, but she complied after seeing how enthusiastic I was to go in.

"Do, I uh... Need my Tetanus shot or something?" She asked warily as I walked into the small junkyard, that was washed in an orange glow from a singular streetlamp that worked inside the whole junkyard. I chuckled at her comment, making our way to my favorite spot within the junkyard. "Yeah, maybe."

There was huge dumps of garbage piled all over the place, a small path between them for people to traverse through. 

At the far end of the junkyard, an old rusty beige truck stood, it barely looked like it would ever work in its lifetime, but I always found it comforting to lay on the bed and look at the stars, or what was visible of them from the orange streetlight on the other side of the junkyard.

"Ta-da." I stopped in front of the pile of junk, dropping our greasy McDonald's bag onto the bed of the truck, before jumping in myself. Rachel looked at the wreck skeptically, trying to decide if it was a good idea to be around. I patted the rust metal beside me, hoping she wouldn't shy away, but Rachel jumped up onto the metal truck bed with me, and I offered her a smile as a thanks for trusting me.

"Raw and rough." Rachel surveyed the rusty truck underneath us, and the entire environment all around. "It suits you."

I shrugged, and grabbed the greasy bag between our thighs, pulling each of the contents out and laying them neatly between us. "Why thank you." I responded, snatching my burger and unwrapping it hungrily. Rachel watched in amusement before grabbing her own fries and picking it, eating the fry in individual small bites.

The cold metal of the truck froze my butt through the material of my pants, like a true edge-lord, I didn't mind and let the skin slowly go numb as I wolfed down the greasy burger in my hand, contrary to Rachel, who was delicate with her meal.

"I see why you like this place." Rachel thoughtfully ran her eyes over the islands of forgotten junk while she sipped on her diet Pepsi. She paused for dramatic effect, and to swallow her mouthful of soda before proceeding.

"Of all the conversations I've had with you, Chloe. One thing seems to stand out the most when I talk to you." She waits for me to answer, raising her eyebrows quizzically, but when I give her a confused shrug, she continued on her own. "You're always finding ways to push yourself down. You treat yourself as if you're a rusted pile of junk." She gestures to the fallen carcasses of old cars and rotted garbage as an example. "You treat yourself as something to be forgotten, like something that should be thrown into a junkyard."

I hated her in that moment, I hated her because she was right. Goddamn Rachel was good at reading people, and it truly scared me. She must have seen something in my eye, because Rachel then grabbed my hand in both of hers, sliding her smooth skin over my calloused knuckles. 

"But you're not, Chloe. You're a person, someone who matters. No one, especially you, should feel that they have to be discarded like a piece of junk, because you're someone Chloe." Rachel's voice seemed to waver very lightly, almost indistinguishable if you didn't know Rachel amber, but I did. We have been through a lot these past few days, I feel like I can trust her in ways I can't trust anyone else.

"You're a person, Chloe. I see you, I hear you."

My heart melted away as I squeezed the skin that encased my hand, Rachel was amazing and she made me feel like the most invincible person on this planet, the second I saw her, I knew she would change my life forever, and I knew she had already started.

"Thanks, Rachel. I..." I didn't know what to say, so I didn't talk, I leaned my head onto her shoulder, and let the rise and fall of her torso with each breath calm me down. Rachel leaned into me, too. Eating the last of her fries, she tossed the empty cardboard holder aside and rubbed her thumb along my knuckles.

I suddenly had the best idea in the world. Reaching into my coat pocket, I grabbed the small silver flask that I always hid in the inner pocket, and revealed it to her. "Let's spice up our beverages a little, shall we?" 

Rachel smirked devilishly as I popped the flat plastic lid off of our drinks and poured (approximately) shot of whiskey in both cups. Rachel shone with delight as she pressed the lid to her cup back on, and took a deep swig of the now spiked drink.

I followed behind her, savoring how the alcohol burned lightly at my throat, a feeling I had come to miss.

My back began to hurt, from sitting the way that we were, so I slid back in the truck bed and leaned myself onto the window that showed the driver's seat of the old truck, Rachel slid back too, making sure she had her drink, before she craned her head up to look at the stars.

I followed her gaze upwards, the stars shone so brightly it threw me off guard, you couldn't see them in the city, from the large amount of light pollution. So every time I could make it out here, it blew me away how breathtaking these stars were.

I took a sip of my spiked Root Beer and wrapped an arm around Rachel. She reciprocated in turn, leaning her head against my shoulder while we gazed up at the stars, and in that moment, I never felt so amazing in my entire life. Rachel suddenly shouted in glee, it made me nearly fly up to the stars, every cell in my body on edge. When I looked at her, her finger was pointed upwards. "Look! Look! It's Leo!"

I let out a breath I didn't realize I was holding, and followed her finger to the stars, and sure enough, a dimly lit pattern in the sky that resembled the one I saw on her map earlier, Leo was there. I laughed at it, and so did Rachel. "So it is." I responded.

Rachel continued to show me the stars, pointing each one out and giving me strange names like Cassiopeia, and Orion. Why would someone name stars? It sounded like a dumb idea to me, but Rachel liked it so much, so I listened and nodded along.

Before long, our drinks were finished and food was gone, we spent countless amount of time staring up at the stars, getting lost in each other's company, we stayed our there for so long, my eyes grew heavy and Rachel rested herself against my shoulder, I knew that night couldn't get more perfect than it already was.

With Rachel by my side, we were gonna kick the world's ass.

 


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *WARNING* This chapter does have some offensive and Homophobic language. In no way is it meant to offend the reader, it is only in the story to spread awareness about LGBT bullies and the vocabulary they use.

Well, here went nothing.

As I stepped into the diner, I knew there would be hell to pay, Max would kill me for randomly leaving without a reason, (or, that's what she will think.) It wasn't until the small bell on the diner door rang as I stepped into the diner, that I actually worried for the future of my job. I knew that I was now living with Rachel, but I still needed a job to live.

"Chloe." Max called from behind the counter. She sounded mad, and I knew I was gonna be dead. I walked to the counter with my head hung in shame, like I was a dog that was going to be punished for peeing inside the house. I stepped next to Max ready for the worst, a lecture, getting payment revoked for a few weeks, or even getting fired. But suddenly her arms wrap around me and she pushes me into a hug, pressing her nose to my neck

"Where were you, Chloe? You freaked me the hell out." Her voice was dripping with concern. I was shocked for a moment, unsure how to act. "You just left and didn't come back, I texted you but you didn't answer." Now I felt worse, I didn't like that Max was upset because of me.

"I... I'm sorry Maxie." I felt like a complete asshole, standing behind that counter. Max pulled away from our hug, having to look upwards to look me in the eyes. "But you're okay, right? You're not hurt?"

I had to swallow some gunk out of my throat before I spoke. "Yes, Max. I'm fine." Relief washed over her face and Max let go of my arms. I vaguely noticed that Kate was standing to my left, she looked significantly less worried, because I'm pretty sure she knew where I was. 

"I went by your house yesterday, but you weren't there, neither was all of your stuff I..." Max's concern was touching, it was good to know that someone actually cared for me. But I felt like such a jackass. I was too enticed by Rachel to be considerate enough to send a text or even let Max know that I was alive.

I'd chosen the girl I fell for, over my best friend, and that shouldn't be allowed. I hurt someone I cared for because I was too much of a heart eyed puppet.

"Max, I..." What could you say to your best friend, who you completely ditched and made them feel terrified about you even being alive? "I'm sorry. I was a monstrous bitch and I didn't think before I acted, I'll always keep you in mind before I act out ever again. I'm sorry Max." I felt like a dope, maybe because I am, but at least I got that off my chest.

"Good." Max's voice hardened, forgetting the conversation we just finished, and letting her expression turn into boss mode. The friend lecture was over, now the Boss lecture was about to start. 

Here we go... 

"Now I can get to your punishment. You left in the middle of work, Chloe. Without a warning, or even a cause." I saw Kate shuffle from the corner of my eye. "This isn't school, Chloe, it's your job, you can't decide that you're going to flake, just because you're bored. You may think you're some badass lone wolf or whatever, but I can't act as your parent, just because you lost yours. Get your act together, Chloe."

Ouch, that kind of stung. I mean, I knew I was unreliable, and that I made mistakes, but Max didn't need to rail me like that. It made my previous guilt pour away, Max had no reason to talk to me like this, just because I'm a fuckup, doesn't mean you're allowed to talk about my parents. Words came out of my mouth before I could stop myself. "At least I'm not some hardass boss who pokes at her employee's insecurities." What? No. What was I doing? Why didn't I have more control over my mouth sometimes?

"I have half a mind to fire you." Max threatened, and I was so shocked I almost let it show. Max was never like this, always calm and kind, even when she was pissed to high hell, she always had a tolerance from me and my shenanigans. Did I finally break her patience, has Max finally had enough of me?

Kate seemed to note the tension between Max and I. She carefully stepped to Max and set a kind hand on her shoulder. "Let me talk to Chloe, okay?" Max seemed unfazed, continuing to look at me with coals in her eyes, it really freaked me out.

Kate convinced her further, squeezing the taller girl's shoulder and Max sighed, nodding and evacuating reluctantly into the kitchen. I mentally thanked Kate for saving my ass. "I'm sorry, Chloe." Kate apologized solemnly. "Max has been going through some tough stuff lately."

I stared at her puzzled. Max was perfectly fine yesterday, so why suddenly would she be going through shit, I didn't get it. Kate must have seen the stupid look on my face, because she gently grabbed my elbow, and dragged me off to an unpopulated corner of the diner. "Max has had to deal with a lot of... Misconduct accusations about our relationship, lately." Kate explained painfully, rubbing her forehead with her fingers. For a moment, I was lost, I had no idea what Kate meant. But then, I understood perfectly.

Max was being bullied, because she was Gay.

God that wasn't fair, and God I was an asshole. Maybe if I had been paying attention to my friend, rather than dicking off with Rachel Amber, then maybe I would have known about this, and maybe I could have helped her out. 

"I'm an idiot." I moaned, pressing my face into my hands. I couldn't even look at Kate anymore, I felt so embarrassed. Why did I have to be so dense? "You're not an idiot." Kate responded quietly, brushing some of the blonde locks from my face. "I think you're really smart, Chloe. You just need help finding where to aim yourself some days."

Uh, thanks? I didn't really know the appropriate response to that. I 'needed help aiming myself.' What in fucks name did that mean? I opened my mouth to challenge her, but decided not to, since I was already in a deep hole, and Kate was trying to dig me out of it. "Thank you." I respond instead, trying out this whole 'gratitude' thing, it actually wasn't that bad, but I wasn't sure how much I liked it.

"For what?" Kate responded kindly. Ugh, she was going to make my gratitude a regular thing, wasn't she? Of course she was. "For letting me know. Now I should talk to Max and try to fix everything I've broken." Kate didn't seem to like that very much, her nose scrunched up lightly. "Try not to go so hard on yourself, Chloe. All humans make mistakes."

That statement was so overused, it was just beating a dead horse, but the way Kate said it, like she genuinely thought that I was just a person that made a silly mistake, it made me want to believe her. I gave Kate a gentle nod, and a pat on the shoulder, before I shuffled off to the kitchen to give Max my apologies.

She seemed intent on something, leaning over and burning all of her focus into it. I felt almost bashful to interrupt, but on a second glance, she didn't seem like she was really paying attention, just using whatever she was doing as an excuse to avoid people, but no one could avoid Chloe Price that easily, I was kind of annoying that way.

"Max?" I asked timidly as I approached, maybe too timid, yikes. I sounded like a Japanese school girl on those really weird anime shows, yikes. Max didn't lift her head at my voice, she was too busy face focusing on (a book?) to even notice I was there, so I tried again. "Max." I repeated sternly.

Max lifted her head to look at me, and I could tell she didn't want to, Max seemed bothered by my very existence, and quite frankly, it hurt. "Listen, I'm-" I started, but was soon to be shut down. 

"I don't care, Chloe. God, you never think before you act, do you?" Her words bit, but they were validated. I didn’t like seeing Max with this kind of anger, no matter how validated it was. I had to convince her that I really was sorry. "I know I fucked up, okay?" I said without thinking. That was my problem, I always thought too much before I spoke, and by the time the words came out, they had been so processed in my mind that they were all mushy and wrong.

"And I know you're right. I think before I talk, but not before I act, and that always makes me do something stupid and that I'll regret, causing others pain. You have every right to hate me, and honestly, you should hate me." Max looked as surprised as I felt, but I was glad to get that off my chest, to let Max know that I really was sorry.

She sighed, closing the book she had set in front of her. "That's good to know Chloe, there are some days when I really want to stick one to you." I let out a nervous chuckle, unsure if that was a good thing, or a bad thing. "Thanks, Chloe. I'm sorry I ripped you one, I've just been going through a lot of shit lately."

I felt really relieved, thank God, I didn't know what I would have done if I lost my best friend. "I know." I replied, wiping the back of my neck with my palm, then wiped my grease covered hand on my jeans.

Max looked skeptical, then I realized that she wasn't there during my conversation with Kate. Maybe you should inform her, smartass. "Kate told me." I explained to her, and she let out a small huff of laughter.

"Of course she did." Max sighed lovingly, I could tell that Max was really in love with Kate, it was adorable, really. Why couldn't I have that? Something perfect. God I'm a basket case. Rachel made me feel great, she was so enticing and adorable. But I didn't know how important she was, I mean, we were dating, but Rachel and I didn't know each other enough, not as much as Max and Kate.

I smiled at Max's smile. "Come on, Max. You've earned a sick day, let me take you out for a day, decompress." I offered to her. I've been a shitty friend lately, so I really needed some one on one time with my best friend. "I... I don't know, Chloe. We have to work.."

I let out a groan. "Come on, hippie. You have enough sick days built up, and you really need a break, let me take you out around the town, and have a good time." I could tell Max was thinking about it, the expression on her face twisted in thought, I had almost won her over. "Some best friend time, no work, no girlfriend, just you and I."

Max nodded. "You're right. I... I need some time off before my hair turns grey." She chuckled, I returned the laughter, but it kind of made me sad. Max was younger than me, 18 years old and she  was a manager of a diner, with a girlfriend and responsibilities, not to mention all the shit she's under because shes gay, it's really fucking sad that Max has to go through all this.

"Awesome, let's bounce." I smiled invitingly at her. "Nice try, Chloe, but we have to sign a form and shit." Max replied, a knowing smile on her face. Wait, you had to do that for a sick day? Well I've been using my sick days wrong. Max laughed at my confused expression and went into the office area. I stood silently and waited for her.

When we were ready, Max explained to Kate where we were going, and gave her a short kiss on the lips, I tried not to watch but it was so hard, those two were adorable. Then finally, we were on the move.

I wasn't sure where I wanted to take Max, the pier seemed to overdone, and I wouldn't want to relive those memories, walking along the beach seemed too much like a date plan, so did taking her out to lunch. It had been so long since Max and I had some friend time that I forgot how to do it.

"You're always raving about that junkyard place, but I've never seen it." Max suggested, as if she could read my mind. "Well, let me take you there." I smiled. "It’s quite a walk away, so we can get some air on our way."

Max seemed to like that idea, she smiled back and followed aside me as I started our trail to the junkyard. I was there just last night, with Rachel, but going today felt fresh, like it was the first time I would ever be going there. Well it certainly was Max's first time.

"Kate told me the things that people were saying about you." I brought up, while we were on our way to the junkyard, after seeing Max's expression, I wish I hadn't, but she really needed to let this out, and I wanted her to know that I was here to help her with that. "Yeah, it started happening a week ago, people have been calling me names and whispering behind my back like they didn't know I could hear."

Goddamn, a week? Max has been going through this shit for that long and I didn't even know about it? Some friend I am... "What have they been calling you?" I asked cautiously, the second I asked, I regretted it. What had people been saying about Max?

"Y... You know... things like.. Dyke, a... and fag and..." Max lost her words, she was on the edge of tears. Why would people even do that to someone like Max? Those names weren't even creative, anyway. God that made me so mad, I wanted to track down the people that hurt her and stick it to them. Instead, I stopped our pace to give Max a big hug.

"We've been through so much, Chloe." Max murmured into the material of my jacket. "I just can't handle this on top of everything."

I felt my eyes well up, Max was so infectious, anything she felt, you felt on the double. I wanted to cry, cry along with Max. "Fuck 'em, Max. They don't deserve your attention." I know that sounded lame,  but it was all I could give, Max seemed grateful, however.

"Thanks, Chloe. I'll try to brush them off." She stood back, brushing her eyes with her sleeve and smiling. "You're a great friend."

I rubbed the back of my neck sheepishly. "I don't know about that..." I had been real bad lately, it was flattering that she thought I was a good person. "Yes, you are. I know things haven't been great, but you really are."

I didn't know what to say back, so we just kept walking.

As we went further, I noticed that we were nearing Rachel's apartment complex. I knew she was off at work, but I really wanted to stop in, the only problem was that I didn't have a key. Neither of us really had time yesterday, so I had to wait around until Rachel was done working for us to go get that done.

"Something wrong?" Max asked, as I caught myself lingering near the building. I sighed, I really didn't want to tell Max about moving out, and Rachel, but she was going to find out eventually, since she was Max afterall. "I... um... Yeah, something's wrong."

Max obviously didn't expect that reaction, because she almost tripped, but regained her composure swifty. "What is it, Chloe?" She asked, worried. And when I wouldn't answer, she started to piece it together on her own. "It's about yesterday, isn't it?"

I nodded shamefully. Why was telling my best friend huge secrets even a hard task, anyway? She's my best friend, it should come naturally, hell, I shouldn't even have big secrets. But I do, because I'm an asshole.

God, I needed some weed.

"There is a reason why I upped and left yesterday." I sighed, gearing up to tell her my big secret. My nerves were so on fire that I couldn't focus, and I couldn't hold back. I fished a regular cigarette from my pocket, because I knew that these didn't bother her, only the weed ones did, and I lit it. After a few puffs of sweet nicotine, I had calmed down enough to coherently explain everything.

"I, I was actually moving out. Say goodbye to that shitty house, because you'll never see it again." It felt surprisingly good to say that, to let that part of my life go. Max seemed happy about that, too. Her expression turned excited. "Oh my Dog, Chloe." (I fucking loved when she said that, such a hipster.) "That's amazing. Where did you move?"

I nodded my head back to the complex that was right behind us, Max looked awestruck. "There?" She seemed hesitant to continue on, and I knew what she was going to say. If it was anyone else, I would stop them, but I let Max say it. "H... How? I didn't think you had the..." 

Money? I sure as hell didn't, and Max knew that, but she didn't ask smugly, like she definitely knew. She was almost guilty, but curious at the same time. And, as always, her curious side won over. Max was always a nosy person, of course I would never say that to her face, but she knew it too, always letting her curiosity get the best of her.

"I-I'm sorry, Chloe. I didn't-" She started after a second, and I realized that I had gone completely silent. I tried to recover. "Ah, shit. No, Max, I'm not mad, I just spaced out a little."

Max relaxed at that, her fear cooling out, I forgot that Max was a really sensitive person, she was always hyper aware of everyone's feelings, that's what made her such a great friend. I on the other hand, always did things without considering anyone else first.

"I moved in with someone." I pressed on, forcing myself to keep walking, Max was hesitant at first, but then kept walking. "With someone? Who?" The dreadful question hit, and I didn't know how to answer it. Should I just keep it vague, and go with 'a friend'? Or should I tell her the truth, reveal my secret?

Why was it that hard? Why couldn't I just say 'my girlfriend.' Or even say, 'Max, I'm gay'? An idea that sounded so simple on concept, but I couldn't, it was just too hard. Is that what Max felt when she first came out? It's hard to picture it, since she's so open about being a Bisexual, and in a relationship with another girl. So couldn't I just do the same?

Max was my best friend, someone I could trust. If I could tell Kate so easily, then Max should be no problem. Plus, I know Max is gay already, so what would she have to mock me for? The longer I waited, the harder it would be to explain, I just needed to get this over with now, so I could put it in the past.

I forced out a breath of stale air, and tried to act as nonchalant as I possibly could when I said, "my girlfriend."

Max didn't understand for a second, her expression unchanging as the gears in her mind worked and processed the information. But as soon as she got it, her jaw nearly hit the concrete, and we halted once again. "You... You." Max tried to sputter out. I kind of wanted to laugh, but this wasn't the time for that. So I simply nodded instead. "My girlfriend, who I'm in a relationship with."

"Chloe, oh my Dog." Max squeaked in her excitement, the girl was just one fluff ball of cuteness. "that's amazing! I... How long?" She asked eagerly. I felt on the spot ad it kind of made me squirm. How long of what? Me knowing I was gay, or being in a relationship with this girl? The answers differed, but not by much.

"I dunno, like, two days ago." I decided to go with the relationship information, stuffing my hands in my pockets. max looked ecstatic, but also stumped. "And you're already moving in with her?" She asked, skeptical, but in the nicest way. Somehow, even when Max Caulfield was being mean, she was nice.

I sighed. "Can I answer all of your questions when we get to the junkyard?" I asked. "I just kind of want to be settled before we talk about something serious like this." That was a lie, I didn't really care about that. But I did need time to form how I was going to explain all this, so waiting until we got to the junkyard would give me some thinking time.

Max nodded, putting a pin in the subject-for the time being-and continued to walk with me, up to the junkyard.

The whole place had a different atmosphere during the day. I didn't really go there much during the day, it was more reserved for the night, when I was alone and cold and needed a smoke in the dark. Man, that sounded like a great idea right now...

But I was close to finishing this cigarette I had now, and I could tell Max was feeling nauseous from it, so I decided to wait until tonight to toke up again. My mouth was watering in anticipation at the idea of smoking up again, but I was running low on weed.

"This is..." Max looked around the area, her face scrunching up in displeasure, I really could tell she didn't like the place, but Maxine Caulfield was too nice to say that. "It... suits you." She finished cautiously.

"That's exactly what she said." I laughed, remembering last night when Rachel said the exact same thing to me. Max looked up at me. "Your girlfriend?" I gave a curt nod and guided Max along to my secret hideout, a small shack in the corner of the old junkyard.

Max followed me, she looked sketched out, it made me laugh and sat down on one of the weird chairs that I had dragged in here when I first discovered the place. Max stood uncomfortably for a few beats before she sat in one of the plastic chairs.

"Tell me about her." Max peristed, folding her hands in her lap. I looked at her, the eager look in her eyes made me shuffle uneasily. "She's, very nice." I tried to pick out a single attribute of Rachel Amber, she was so many things, it was really hard to describe an amazing girl like her.

Max raised an eyebrow. "Is that all?" She asked, amused as she sat back into the chair, she was definitely starting to calm down and get comfortable. I sighed audibly, I knew that Max wanted to hear more, I just didn't know if I wanted to give more. But Max gave me a persistent look, until I folded.

"Her name is Rachel." Just saying the name made me tingle from head to toe, I loved her name, I loved that it was hers, I loved everything about that girl. Max gave me a warm look. "You're thinking about her, aren't you?" 

I felt my face heat in embarrassment. I haven't felt like this in so long. Whole and warm, like nothing's wrong, the feeling was so foreign that I felt alarmed for a minute, but Max brought me down to earth. She seemed so ecstatic that I was in a relationship, with a girl no less. I wanted to move on before I got too used to this new feeling.

"She came from a small Hick town down West." I recounted Rachel's story, but I wanted to leave the personal parts out, Max didn't need to hear those. "Wanted to make it big in LA, so she chased her dreams to here."

In a way, I envied Rachel. She had a perfect fairy tale story, growing up in a tiny town, then making it big in fucking Los Angeles, why couldn't have my life been that easy? All I got was dead parents and financial problems.

Ha, the name of my autobiography.

"She's beautiful, blonde hair and perfect skin. I don't know what I did to deserve her." Now I was just letting things out that I didn't mean to, but Rachel really did deserve it, she was one of the best people I knew. Max smiled, "you sound happy, Chloe." She observed.

I guess I did, and it was because I was happy. No one ever made me feel like what I felt when I was with her, the feeling of pure happiness. I sounded like a gross sap, I knew I did, but at that point, I stopped caring, because those were the things that Rachel Amber made me feel.

"I am, Max. I only met her days ago, but... Damn." That was the only word I could say, it was the only word that expressed the feeling between us. "Is it weird that I'm this into her, and we only met days ago?" I asked softly, almost afraid of the answer I would get.

Max laughed. "No, Chloe. You should have seen me with Kate." Max looked dreamy as she thought about it. Max's relationship was always something that made me feel like a cynic. I always scrunch my nose and blew it off, but I had to admit that her and Kate were cute. I decided to shut my trap and let the attention be taken off me for a moment.

"It was tough for us for a long while." Max admitted, playing with her fingers, like she always did when she was thinking over something. "It was hard for Kate, because she had to balance her religion with herself and her wants, a battle that really was a tough one."

That's right, Kate was a strong Christian, a religion that usually frowned upon gay culture. That must have been hard for her. "I was absolutely crazy for her, but I wanted her to be comfortable, so I didn't rush us." Max's eyes were clouded with the memories. Goddamn, I really wanted someone to look at me like Max looked when she thought of Kate, Rachel was definitely a good start.

"So we went slow. First week, we were only allowed to hold hands. The second week, I was allowed to kiss her head. Fourth, I could kiss her cheek. It wasn't until six weeks into our relationship that I was actually able to kiss her on the lips. But I did it, Chloe. I waited that long, I respected her, and never rushed her. Because I loved her, Chloe." Max's eyes were a little wet, and I couldn't blame her. The only functional people in my life at that time was Max and Kate, the perfect couple.

Max wasn't done, I had a sense that she was going to continue to mom lecture me. But I didn't mind. "It seems like you've found that with her, Chloe." I did, I really fucking did. And I was terrified at the idea of messing it up. "Cherish this girl, okay? I don't want you to mess this up, because she seems perfect.

I gave an eager nod. "Perfect is the best way to describe her, Max." I slid back in the plastic lawn chair I sat in. It was way too small for me, and fuckin uncomfotable, but comfortable all at once. There was a twist in Max's face letting me know that she suddenly attached onto a new subject, and the other was forgotten. "Which reminds me, why did you move in with her, exactly?"

Wait, what reminded her of that? Didn't matter, I was going to have to answer that question, one way or another. I took a deep breath, ready to recount yesterday's story. "We skipped work yesterday, because Rachel was stressed from her work-which I'll get into later-and she really wanted to see my house. I was strictly against it, and you know why, you've seen the place." Max nodded painfully, as if the reminder was grim.

"But, of course, I showed her the place, because she's the type of girl who gets what she wants." Max made a face. "And when we got there, she seemed... Sad. It wasn't exactly pity, or disappointment. But she seemed sad at the idea that I had to live there. So out of the blue, she asked me to move in with her."

I stopped for a moment, laughing at myself as I remembered the story. Now that it's all over, the reality of it is sinking in, it was a crazy idea. "She has a large apartment, several bedrooms, so she gave me some analogy about us being like we're college roommates. And I bought it, probably because this girl was incredibly irresistible, and I would bend to her every will." I let out a long breath, just thinking about her made my stomach coil with heat."Next thing I knew, I had all my shit packed, and I was in a car, headed to her place."

Max was attentive as she listened, her arms folded in her lap. There was a look of concern on her face that looked strictly... Parental. "Just be careful around her, Chloe." She advised, and I honestly felt like she was my mother for a second, I felt kinda high.

I knew what she was thinking. That if she was someone who always got her way, she might be manipulative. But Rachel wasn't that kind of person, I could tell. At least. so far. So I nodded, to save a Momma Max lecture from coming my way.

Suddenly, I was not in the mood to talk about my relationship, or girls. I shot up from my seat, startling Max. "Let me show you around the place." I offered, because I was sick of talking about all this grown up stuff, and I wanted to play with my best friend now. (I know that sounded dirty, don't twist my words!)

Max looked heavily reluctant, but gave in when I extended my hand out towards her. She grasped my palm and allowed me to pull her up from the plastic thing. I made sure to give her a big encouraging smile, so she would be less freaked to check this place out, and it definitely worked, she looked a little more relaxed.

I kept her hand in mine, and used it to tug her from the grungy shack, and into the even grungier junkyard. I had no idea where to start, there was so many places here that I loved, the old yellow school bus, the big old boat, or the beige and rusted truck. Everything around the place was my target practice, I came up here every time I got upset and needed to blow off some steam, using a discarded baseball bat I found to beat everything and anything up.

I decided I wanted to show her the truck, where I was around 10 hours ago, eating McDonald's and stargazing with Rachel. Only now, there weren't any stars to look at.

When I brought Max over, I noticed that our garbage was still sitting in the bed of the truck. Fast food wrappers and cups, knocked over and sprawled about the rusted metal. I knew it was bad to litter, but Rachel and I had been so tired, but also giddy that night, we didn't really think to pick up our shit after we were done.

Max looked at the wrappers disapprovingly, and I could tell that she knew it was from me.

"What's with the mess?" She frowned, brushing the wrappers and cups aside. I helped her, then jumped up onto the truck, the cold metal freezing my butt. Wow, deja vu. Max looked hesitant before she joined me too, grunting loudly as she slammed down onto the truck.

"Careful there." I chuckled at her, and she let out an airy laugh as a response, brushing off her pain. "You holled up here last night?" I watched Max as she picked at the discarded wrappers. I debated telling her it was Rahel and I, or if I just wanted to say it was me, myself and I.

Max wanted the truth, so I guess I should give it to her. "Rachel and I, we came here last night." I admit, leaning back onto the main component of the truck, just like I had with Rachel last night, the ghost her weight on my shoulder. "I brought her out here last night as a thank you for having me move in with her." I crumpled one of the wrappers sheepishly. "And McDonald's was the only thing I could really afford."

I felt Max shuffle beside me, looking up at the deep blue sky. "That's awesome, Chloe." Max gave me a look, one that made my fingers tingle. "I should meet her sometime." She smiled, I mirrored the gesture. "Someday you might."

We slowly fell into silence, I had a real knack for creating awkward silences, since I'm just the idea of Anxiety balled up into the shape of a human. I ran my hand along the rusted metal of the truck, rough and gritty under the skin of my palm. I seriously loved this truck, I always used to it crawl under and sleep in, when my house just didn't cut it. 

It was really my second house, a safe haven when that rotted shitbox was just too much to bear. I scratched at the rust with my fingernails, could this thing ever run again? It seems doomed, but if I could get it working...

No, I was crazy, there was no way this rust bucket would do anything other than sit and rot here, but idea was comforting. Max looked at me, her face twisted as she tried to read me. "You're thinking of something, what is it?" She asks skeptically, as if my genius idea was to jump off a bridge and see if I could live it.

"Just a dumb idea." I mumbled aloud, brushing my rusted hands on my pants. They were already dirty so I didn't have anything to lose, really.

Max didn't really approve of this, she lightly checked my shoulder to try and get an answer out of me. Her playful demeanor was charming, really. I could see why Kate liked her, and why they got along just fine. With a shrug, I caved. "This truck, I was just wondering if I could get it running." I refused to look at Max as I continued to rub the coarse rust of the metal. "It was a stupid thought, though. Because this thing is, like, ancient."

How great would it be though? To have a car? Nothing high maintenance, like an Audi or Ferrari. A car that I had a past with, something that I felt comfortable with, and that I resonated with. Well, I'd have to get a licence before I could take it to the streets, first. Max placed her hand on mine, a surprising gesture that made me jump, she took that as discomfort, and removed her hand, but I wanted her to put it back on mine. I liked the comfort.

"It's not stupid, Chloe. I actually think that would be an awesome idea. A leap forward for you." Max's support was touching. It made me really believe that I could fix this basket case. I got to my feet suddenly, startling Max, who stood up after she got her composure back. I swung my leg over the side of the bed and hopped out, Max took the long route however, climbing out of the bed carefully, and meeting me up at the hood of the truck.

With some heave, and struggle, I managed to pop the hood, that had been rusted shut. The inside of this tuck looked like a warzone, rust and metal pieces everywhere. But luckily, my dad used to love playing with cars when he was around, I loved playing with him whenever he would get his hands dirty. Max watched me as I ran my fingers along the inner workings of the engine. It looked like nearly everything needed to be replaced, this damn thing needed a lot of love.

The girl beside me looked suddenly doubtful, her words of encouragement evaporated as soon ash she saw the rusted heap inside. 

"Um... Are you sure that you can fix this, Chloe?" Max was unsure, which made me chuckle. This girl was always underestimating things, her concern was touching, sure. But there was nothing that I couldn't ever do. "Definitely."


	9. Chapter 9

"Um... uh... a dog?" Rachel guessed, squinting her eyes and rubbing her beer bottle against her cheek. I felt my eyes widen, then looked back at the poster paper, where my atrocious drawing lived. "Does that look like a damn dog to you?" I replied, laughter slipping out between the words. Rachel grinned her teeth, looking bashful at the answer she came up with.

"I give up!" She conceded, putting her hands up in defeat. "I suck at Pictionary." She sighed, slumping back onto the couch, and taking another swig of the beer. I laughed at her, then looked back at my drawing. "Well it was your idea."

"I know, I know." Rachel acknowledged, swatting her hand weakly at me. "What is it?"

I turned to the atrocity on the poster paper. Okay, it was bad, but not quite an atrocity. I took a drag of my joint before I gave her the answer. "It's a Swan." Then, Rachel busted out into laughter, almost spilling the beer in her hand. She laughed and wheezed.

My swan wasn't that bad, was it? I looked back at the drawing, and back at Rachel. "What is it?" I asked, confused. I didn't get why Rachel thought my swan was so funny. "Swans don't-" Rachel paused to laugh again, she couldn't get a coherent sentence out. Finally, she manage to speak. "Swans don't have four legs!" Her laughter doubled.

I stared back at the drawing, my swan indeed had four legs on it, I didn't see anything wrong with it. "No, they don't." I retorted defensively. Rachel laughed harder, almost falling off the couch. "Y-yes. T-they do." My face burned up with embarrassment, I promise it was a swan, and swans have four legs.

However, Rachel disagreed, she continued to laugh and drink, while I continued to smoke and blush. "Have you ever seen a swan?" Rachel asked after she had calmed down, sipping her beer. I shook my head plainly. "But I didn't do that bad for an educated guess, right?"

Sputtering on her beer, Rachel laughed and nodded in agreement. "Not bad, Price."

I set the marker down, my mood for Pictionary was ruined. But it was okay, 'cause I was kicking Rachel's ass, anyway. Pulling another drag of smoke into my lungs, I made my way over to the couch, where Rachel sat crisscrossed and finished off her second beer. With a heave of smoke, I laid myself down on the couch, resting my head on Rachel's lap.

After setting the empty bottle aside, and grabbing a new one, Rachel looked down at her lap, to where I was. Her long hair fell down and brushed my cheeks, tickling the skin. I chuckled and brushed some of her hair behind her ears, saving me from inhaling the golden strands. Rachel chuckled in return, cracking her beer open audibly.

I took in more drugs through a drag. I felt the drugs starting to work on my system, loosening the tight muscles in my shoulders, clouding my brain from any poisonous thoughts. I loved being in this state, there was nothing but the feeling of peace, and the comfort of drugs to make all my problems go away, at least for a little bit. And now, I had Rachel to go with the mix.

To me mindful of Rachel, I parted my lips only slightly, and let the smoke spill out of my lips slowly, I didn't want to blow all of it in her face. She watched as the smoke slowly slipped out of my mouth in a mesmerizing pattern. Before I knew it, she leaned down and captured my lips with hers.

The remaining smoke that was in my mouth was exchanged between us, Rachel let out a sigh as the smoke drifted out from her lips. She pulled back just enough, and gave me a sultry smile. I felt my knees weaken.

"So, what were you up to when I was off at work today?" Rachel asked quizzically, taking a swig of her newly opened beer. I pondered the question for a moment, debating whether to tell when what I was really doing, I don't know why, though. It's not like I did anything ultimately bad, Max and I just had a day to ourselves.

I stretched out my body and finished off the joint in my hands, now reduced to a stud. "Skipping work." I shrugged my shoulders shamelessly when Rachel lifted her eyebrows. Technically my answer wasn't wrong. I didn't work today, but, the degree to which I 'skipped' work, is certainly debatable.

"Chloe..." Rachel scolded. I almost want to laugh, her and Max would get along in being parenting icons for me. Instead, I gave her a pat on the thigh, stretching my wrist in a weird way to do so. "Relax. I did it legitimately."

Rachel looked confused, and doubtful at the same time. What, she couldn't trust me? "My friend, and also boss, was having a hard few days, we needed some time off." I explained, playing with the fabric of Rachel's jeans. She sputtered out a chuckle as she drank her beer. "So you 'skipped' work with your boss?"

I laughed. Skipping with your boss isn't really skipping, but it sounded more fun that way. "I know, I know." I pushed my fingers into Rachel's blonde mane, which had fallen back on to my face. "I told her about us, and she wants to meet you."

Rachel lets out a small chuckle. "Should I be worried then?" She asks, taking another large sip from her bottle. "Nah, she's nice." I responded, closing my eyes and continuing to comb my fingers into her hair. I started remembering back to earlier, when Max and I were in the junkyard, and she was giving me confidence for the truck.

That thing was pretty fucked, it would take an extreme amount of effort and love to get that thing working, more love and effort than I could give, really. But I was still going to try, having a car would grant some freedom. After I got a licence that is.

After a long while of drinking and small talk, Rachel and I quickly grew tired, so we decided to call it an early night, and I spent my second night in Rachel's apartment. I was strangely noisy, but quiet at the same time, free from the sounds of people fighting outside, and instead have the sounds of traffic, cars driving by, horns honking.

The atmosphere was so shockingly different that I found sleep came difficulty. The bed under my back was so soft, too soft, that my body found it strangely odd to be on. So despite the tiredness that was picking at my limbs, I laid awake.

I felt hollow, in the bed that wasn't mine, in the apartment that wasn't mine. Rachel had been so kind to let me, someone who was practically a stranger, into her place. I mean, yeah, we had made our before, and we are technically in a relationship (I think?) But moving in is apparently a big step, something you don't just do because you can (according to Max.) It's just not normal.

But Rachel was no normal girl. She was pretty, could smoke a joint, and could somehow score us some beer. Rachel was... Something else. Ugh, I didn't know how to describe her, just every time I think about her, there's this feeling in my stomach and ugh... I couldn't get away from this girl, even if I wanted to.

Sleep began to pull at my limbs, and I let it, the heating vents slowly ticked and gave me some white noise to fall asleep to. For a moment, I felt like I was home. Not that Shitty Shit Shack, but Home. With my very alive parents, and the warm fireplace, with the vents that would tick when they expanded or contracted. For the first time in years, so many years, I felt comfortable, I felt safe.

With those thoughts in my mind, I slowly drifted to sleep.

-

Nathan Prescott had a wicked fucking shiner. Well, it wasn't fully showing, he had some makeup to cover it. But it was very terribly done, the purple and black skin beneath showed through. He seemed to know this, though, as he held his head down, and wore a long sleeve shirt that I had never seen on him before. The whole thing sketched me out. I definitely can't claim to know Prescott overly well, but he's never been in a fight before.

Maybe he was getting into some deep shit? Nah, he seemed to skittish, jumping at everything that made noise, he seemed scared, and it made my bones shiver. "Hey, what's up with Prescott?" I lightly elbowed Max to pull her from whatever she was doing, she grunted back at me, then followed my gaze to where Nathan stood, wiping down an already clean table.

"I don't know." Max sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. "I tried to talk to him, but he just blew me off." Something about that seemed really off, yeah Nathan was kind of an asshole, but he was always a suck up to bosses, or anyone of authority over him, unfortunately for me, I didn't fall under that category, yet he was always passive around me. Probably because he knew that I could kick his ass. Like someone obviously just did.

My lips twitched into a frown. "Something really sketchy about this..." I mumbled aloud to myself. Max gives me a shiver and I grunt back, there's a disappointing look on her face, scolding me for thinking lowly of Nathan, no doubt. I watched as he finished and scurried out the door, break time.

I knew I got this a lot, but my Chloe Senses were seriously tingling. I had a severe urge to tail Nathan and get some answers out of him, I didn't like how sketchy he was being in here, it made me feel as if Max and I were in danger, he better not have any shit up his sleeve. But Max was worried too, she seemed like she would be on top of it, it was her job to look after employees, after all.

But if I didn't do this for myself, put the investigation in my own hands, it would seriously bug me for the rest of the day. I glanced back at Max, who was re absorbed into whatever work she was doing, I huffed.

"Break time, I'll be back in a few." I told her, trying to sound as un-suspicious as I possibly could, Max only hummed back and flipped the page of whatever she was reading, absentmindedly tapping her fingers on the counter with her free hand. I took it as my ticket to bail.

Pushing myself off of my leaning position against the counter, I made my way to the front door of the diner, which lead to the sandy Santa Monica beach, and Nathan Prescott, who was nervously sucking on a cigarette against the sidewall of the diner. I grabbed my own-non grass-cigarette and lit it, slowly stepping out to where the shivering boy stood. He jumped upon seeing me out of the corner of his vision.

"Chloe." He greeted, sounding nervous as hell and trying his best to conceal it, which obviously wasn't working. Taking a long drag, I leaned against the wall beside him, blowing a long cloud of smoke into the January air, Nathan watched quietly, his eyes lingering on the smoke before quickly correcting himself and looking forward. "What are you doing here?"

I let a few seconds pass before answering. Both to build suspension, and to inhale another eager puff of the cigarette in my hand, which I hadn't realized that I had been craving so bad until now. "Havin' my break, just like you." I responded with feigned cheer, holding a cloud of smoke in my mouth, before blowing it out. Nathan nodded shakily, and shivered against the cold winter breeze as he pulled another drag from his cigarette.

We both stood in silence, and I savored the sickening taste of tobacco in my mouth while I watched the waves lap against the sandy beach shoreline. Being In Nathan Prescott's company alone was abnormal and odd, I didn't like the feeling he radiated. "Why with me?" He asked, shattering the silence between us. He had finished his cigarette, dropping it on the ground before crushing the remains with the tip of his shoe.

I pulled the shortening cigarette from my mouth, and licked my lips, tasting the leftover salt and tobacco from them, and a hint of Rachel's lipstick lingered on my tongue from this morning... For the sake of this conversation, and my sanity, I tried to press the thought of our tender kiss from before she left work this morning out of my head.

"That's a real nice shiner you got there." I commented quietly, trying to act as smug as I could. Nathan seemed to go rigid from the corner of my eye. "I... I don't know what you're talking about." He defended weakly, crossing his arms over his chest, and bowing his face down to the ground. But he knew exactly what I was talking about, I know he did.

Shuffling in place, I thought about how I was going to approach this. I could be direct, possibly scaring him off, but getting a solid answer, or I could be subtle, taking longer to get his secret, but giving me a higher chance of actually hearing it. By the time I've decided, Nathan was already nervous, so there was no point in being careful, I decided to go all in.

"Listen, I know you got fucked up. You can't hide it from me, Nathan," I was as blunt about it as I could have been, I wanted Nathan to know that I wasn't going to give up until I got an answer. One that I'm satisfied in. The boy beside me seemed to shiver, scared of the full on force I was throwing his way. He slowly tilted his head away as if I didn't already notice the poorly covered bruise. "I just got into an argument, okay?"

Completely unsatisfied with the answer I was given, I made a scene about putting out my tiny cigarette butt, tossing it onto the ground with force, and stomping down hard with my toes. "Try again." I answered angrily

I really had no idea what was going on with me, I never really cared about Prescott, or anything that concerned him, for that matter. But suddenly he gets a shiner and I'm all over him? About a week ago, I would have made some inappropriate quip about him getting beat up, and walked away without a care. But what's changed within a week?

Rachel, it was definitely Rachel.

Ever since I met her these past few days, she's shown me unwavering kindness, and she's done to me what very few people have in my lifetime, she's cared for me. I knew that Max would always be there for me, she was a real pal and knew how to make me feel welcome, and close. But Rachel was better at it.

She let me move into her fucking house, she told me her secrets, she kissed me until I was seeing stars... I don't think Max could top that, even if she tried.

So, recap. Was I blaming this sudden care for Nathan Prescott's life on Rachel? Well, maybe not entirely, but Rachel was definitely rubbing off on me in a way that wasn't entirely sexual (which was disappointing, sure.) So maybe that's why I was so intent on finding out what was happening to Nathan? Because I wanted to help?

Yeah, no. Gross.

I forced out a sigh after he scrambled for an answer. "I mean it Chloe, it was just a small scrap, nothing you would care about, anyway." Nathan spat bitterly, and it made me flinch. Was I really that much of a dick to him?

I guess I was, he always had more than me, for the entire time that I've known him. So maybe I've just been jealous, jealous that he was actually successful in life. And that the only reason he worked at the diner was just to get a little extra cash on the side, whereas I needed the job to keep myself alive.

Ugh, Rachel was rubbing off on me way more than I would have liked, changing the way I thought about things. I looked at Nathan, and how he looked like he was going to burst into tears at any moment. It was a look I had never seen from him before, and it actually frightened me. With a huff, I dropped the subject. "Okay, Nathan. Forget I talked about it."

The boy looked temporarily relieved, before scooting back into the diner without another word. I decided to spend a few more minutes outside, pulling out another cigarette from the pack and lighting it up. My nerves began to dwindle as I pulled in smoke and slowly exhaled it through my lips, I wasn't sure why smoking always made me calm down, maybe it was repetitive action of inhaling and exhaling, maybe it was the chemicals I was inhaling. Didn't matter, it felt really nice.

I allowed myself to relax for several minutes, repeatedly inhaling smoke, but having to clear my throat every while, as the tobacco started to get caught in my throat. If I wasn't careful one day, some of it may block up my throat, but I never smoked that much, I was sure to be careful with my smoking. Careful enough.

"Chloe!" A loud voice tore me from the calm of the moment, I looked up from my lit cigarette to find Rachel making her way towards me from the beach. She looked somehow exhausted, but also amazing at the same time, her blue feather swaying from her ear with each step. "Didn't you get my call?" She asked, once she got closer.

I grunted, then reached into my back pocket to grab the old brick phone that Rachel had gifted me, I flipped it open, and got no reaction, the damn thing was dead. I wasn't surprised, the thing had a battery life of like, 9 minutes. "Dead." I told her, wiggling the useless brick as I shoved it back in my pocket.

Rachel looked temporarily disappointed before she switched her spirits, looking surprisingly happy. "What are you doing?" She asked, watching as I flicked some dead ash onto the sidewalk. I had no clue why Rachel was in such good spirits today, but I decided not to dampen it. "Havin' a smoke." I replied evenly, pulling in the smoke and pushing it out in a long, thin stream.

Flicking her hair behind her shoulder, Rachel leaned against the side of the building beside me, she gave me that blinding smile that I could never resist.  "Can I have a drag?" Rachel asked, running her knuckles along mine with the question. I loved the feeling of her skin on mine, and she knew that was my weakness. She was smart.

I nodded and handed the cigarette to her, Rachel gave a smile and carefully took it from between my fingers. I watched as she slowly brought the cigarette between her lips, and took a long drag, the tip of the cigarette glowed bright orange as she stole from it.

Rachel then handed it back to me, then opened her mouth and allowed the smoke to slowly pool from her lips. It was so not fair. It wasn't fair that Rachel was that fucking hot, and she knew it. Rachel curved her lips upwards in a smirk as the last of the smoke trailed out from her lips. I quickly caught myself staring and fixed it, sucking in the last of the cigarette which just had Rachel's lips on it and I could taste her lipstick and I was light headed.

Whoa, I needed to slow down before I passed out. It was amazing how this girl managed to do this to me, how one girl completely hardwired my brain. I would never date another guy again.

Before I knew it, the cigarette between my fingers was just a stub, I tossed it onto the ground, then crushed it with the heel of my boot. Mimicking the feeling that my chest was under. "Can we head inside?" Rachel asked, purposefully brushing her shoulder against mine. "I didn't get any coffee this morning and I'm hella tired."

I chuckled at her, pushing off the building and going to the entrance. "Hella? I haven't heard that one in a while." That word was dead as hell(a), but for some reason, Rachel wanted to bring it back. Rachel laughed too. "What can I say? I live in the past." I pushed the cigarette pack in my pocket and went inside, silently signalling Rachel to follow. She caught up with me and gave my side a light shove when inside, I laughed quietly and Rachel slumped down into a booth near the door, giving me a smile that made me shiver.

I decided not to keep Rachel waiting, and went into the kitchen in a hurry to grab the coffee pot. "Hey hey there, Speed Racer." Max exclaimed when I almost ran her over on my way to get the pot for Rachel. I grabbed it and looked over at Max, who was recovering from almost getting flattened.

"Sorry." I murmured, rocking on my heels in anticipation to get to Rachel. "What are you doing?" Max asked, picking up a pencil she had dropped. I couldn't help but look over at Rachel, even if I wanted to. The aspiring model was sitting at her booth, idly swiping the screen of her phone with the pad of her thumb, as if she had other things on her mind.

Max slowly followed my gaze until her eyes rested on Rachel too. It took her a second to figure it out, but then she looked back at me, her eyes amused. "Is that her?" She asked.

I nodded to Max without looking. Instead my eyes were back onto Rachel. She looked careless at the booth, her mind on whatever she wanted, no troubles were holding her down, or crushing her shoulders. I wanted to be that free, I wanted to so bad. But I wasn't a beautiful model like her, I wasn't a fucking perfect human being like her.

I was snapped out of my trance by Max, who was beaming at me. "She really is beautiful, Chloe." I felt like she was my mom, looking at the girl I was madly crushing on, I decided to brush Max off. "Yeah, I know." I responded, gripping the coffee cup harder.

Max seemed to get the indication that I was not happy to be distracted from Rachel, as she stepped back and let me make my way back to where the blonde sat. Rachel smiled as I poured the coffee into her mug, only waiting a second before she started sipping the hot drink. I sank into the booth across from her.

Giving me a small smirk of reassurance, Rachel continued to sip on her straight black coffee. I don't know how she does it, way too bitter for me. After a few long moments of Rachel drinking the coffee like it was water, she sets the mug down, and wipes her lips with her sleeve. "Thanks, Chloe."

I gave her a nonchalant shrug, trying to play it as cool as she was. "Hey, It's my job, isn't it?" I replied. Suddenly the realization that Max or anyone could be watching us right now kicked in, and I lowered my arms from the side of the booth, trying to look like a normal functioning human being.

"Yeah, well, your job is also to be out there and serving other people. But you aren't doing that, are you?" Ohhh, Rachel was smooth, but I was smoother. "I don't want to serve other people, I'm happy where I am right now.

Rachel smirked, but she didn't reply, leaving me hanging as she takes another sip of the coffee. "Which one's your boss?" She starts up a new conversation, scrapping the other one, which I was obviously winning. I took a moment to remember her question, because I was paying attention to the way Rachel's lip gloss was causing her lips to shine, instead of the question she asked.

Max, she was asking for Max.

I looked around the room, trying to find where the brunette girl was hiding. She was pretty short, around Rachel's height, so she could be anywhere. But I found her, talking with Beau.

There's a guy I haven't seen in a while, his broad shoulders were impossible to miss. Where has he been lately? He certainly hasn't been around here lately. But neither was I, so I guess we were even. I pointed over to where Max stood, a dwarf compared to the giant who stood in front of her.

Rachel made a face. "The huge muscular dude?" She asked, sceptical. I whipped my head back to the conversation happening between the two bosses, they seemed to reach an agreement, as they both nodded, then Beau went off to his own. I wondered what they were talking about...

"Huh? No. Well, yes." I paused for a moment to gather my thoughts. "The big guy runs the place, but the smaller girl." It was really weird addressing Max as anything other than, Well, Max. "She's my actual boss."

Rachel paused for a moment, looking at Max from where she sat in the booth. Then, she smiled. "She looks nice." I looked back at Max, who was talking to late, and had a big smile on her face. Max was nice, she really was. I was so lucky to have her around in my life, she was the friend that I didn't deserve to have. "She really is." I replied, watching as Max told Kate something, and smiled at the reply she'd gotten.

I turned back to Rachel, who was sipping on her coffee, which had considerably cooled down, but it was still as bitter as I am, so it was dangerous to be drinking. Yet Rachel drank it anyway. "I'm off work for the day." She announced, looking into the mug she held with intrigue, occasionally spinning the contents inside. "I'm up to do anything really." She said the words like they were an invitation, and I was ready to take it.

I scratched the back of my head, thinking of what I was up to do, while also taking care of the itch back there. "I was going to go to the junkyard, and take a look at that old truck, now that I've got some tools I borrowed." Max was nice enough to lend me some, not sure where she got them, or why she needed them. But it was nice of her to lend me them anyway, I'll have to ask afterwards...

"Oh, yes the truck. You told me about that." Rachel nodded interestingly, finishing the coffee in her mug. "Sure, we could definitely do that. Then afterwards, I could take you out for a little dinner." She smiled, with that enticing look that she knew I couldn't ignore. So I didn't, I nodded. "Sounds like a date."

Rachel smirked, and my knees felt a little weak.

"I have nothing to do around here, I can jet any time you want." I informed her, Yeah I still had work to do, but it's not like anyone would miss me, they're busy enough. Rachel crossed her arms in front of her on the table and leaned forward. "Don't you have work to do?"

"Nah, I'm off right now." I lied, feeling my heart trip inside my chest. I doubt Rachel would call me out on it, because that would mean that we couldn't go out by ourselves, so I knew I had the advantage, and so did she. Rachel gave a nod and stood up, extending her hand out to me. I took it, letting her lift me to my feet, despite not needing the help, I liked it.

Rachel continued to hold on to my hand, yet she didn't tug me anywhere this time. "Let's get fixing then." Rachel beamed, walking beside me as we made our way to the door, and I shed the apron I was wearing. Didn't need that anymore.

We went back to Rachel's apartment, where I'd stashed the tools that Max had given me yesterday, and we threw them into Rachel's car. When I slammed her trunk down, I felt my butt vibrate. Wait, it wasn't my butt, it was the phone in my back pocket. Probably Max wondering where I was.

Another vibration indicated that she found out.

I severely didn't want to deal with that right now, so it went ignored. I allowed my phone to vibrate endlessly, and didn't want to answer it. "You gonna get that?" Rachel asked, as she started her car and backed out of the parking lot. I pulled the small phone from my pocket and turned it on silent, drowning out the vibrations. "Nope."

Rachel seemed skeptical for a second, remaining still, her hand on the stick shift. She seemed to make up her mind however, because she started the car, and put it into gear. I was endlessly excited to get to that truck and start working. Part of me hoped that it would require a lot of work to get running, because that would mean that I'd have to put a lot of effort and love into it.

But on the other hand, I didn't want it to, because I didn't want that much work. Either way, getting to that truck was my main priority at that moment, and all because Max put a little faith in me, it's surprising how only a little bit of faith could make someone go this far. That, and Max had a big influence on me, she was someone really important in my life.

I felt my stomach jolt when the car came to a stop at the front of the junkyard. I quickly unbuckled my seat belt, giving no time for Rachel to catch up before I was already popping the trunk.

Rachel laughed. "What's with the hurry, Usain Bolt?" She get herself out of the car, and watched as I pulled the toolbox out of the car's trunk, before slamming it back closed. "I just want to get this going, Rachel. Max put some faith in me, and that's jump started me."

She didn't oppose, Rachel only gave me an amused smirk and I took that as a passage. The tool box in my hand was heavy, sure. But I could handle it. I made my way over to the back of the junkyard, navigating through the piles of junk for the millionth time, I could probably do this with my eyes closed, but I decided to keep them open, just for today.

After nearly slicing my calf on an exposed rod of metal, I made it to the old and battered truck. The thing was beautiful in a way that only someone like me, who's lived in a world where only a minimum amount of things were available to me, would understand. I rested the heavy toolbox down beside my feet as I looked at the rusted titan of a truck.

This thing must have been 10 years old, maybe even more, I already knew that it would be no ease (and cheap) task to do. Suddenly, I was joined by Rachel, who stood at my side and surveyed the truck with her arms crossed, she looked so deep in thought that there was no way she was actually thinking about the rusted heap that sat in front of us.

My first order of business was to pop open the hood, this car couldn't work if there wasn't any proper battery or mechanics inside. I stepped forward and placed my hands on the hood, slowly pulling it upwards, but the rusted metal didn't budge. I switched the angle of my hands and tried again, pulling harder and grunting from my efforts.

"Need some help?" Rachel asked, stepping forward and grabbing the hood as well. It looked like it was rusted shut, a lot of effort would be needed to get this puppy open. I nodded to Rachel and pushed upwards, hearing her follow moments after me. We both grunted with the effort, and tried harder, I heard the metal creak, and I knew we were getting close, but it was no use. I released my hold on the hood with a loud grunt.

There was no way it would budge with just our hands, I needed some sort of tool to get it open. Rachel looked to me for direction on what to do next, and I chewed the inside of my cheek while I focused.

"This thing won't be in any good position, see if you can find any new parts, like batteries and shit around here while I try to pop this sucker open." The chances of Rachel finding any parts that were new enough to get this sucker running were very slim, but Rachel was a talented girl, she would make it work.

Rachel nodded, then raced off like a soldier who had gotten a command from her War Lord, I smirked as I watched her take off, glad to have someone like that in my life.

After Rachel went out of view, I started digging in Max's magical tool box for anything I could use to get this damn thing open, I picked up a thick screwdriver from inside and inspected it, it was looking pretty thick, maybe I could pry the hood open with this thing.

I jammed the head of the screwdriver into the small crevice between the hood and the rest of the car, then began to force it down, in an attempt to get the damned thing open. The metal creaked, quivering as it tried to stay strong and steel (ha ha, steel) itself against my efforts.

When I started to feel the screwdriver bend, I gave up, tossing the useless thing onto the ground with an aggravated sound. I was hoping that Rachel had better luck than I had right then. What else was I going to use?

I looked around, trying to gather my thoughts, when I saw a large metal rod that I had almost hurt myself on. I knew that may be able to work. I made my way over to it, and where it jutted out of a pile of random junk, and grabbed the sides carefully, making sure to avoid the sharp point. After one yank, then two, the rod dislodged from its pile, causing me to trip back and almost impale myself with the damned thing.

I let out a relieved breath, looking at the spear-like pole in my hand. You could kill someone with this damned thing. Or, maybe you could unjam a stuck Truck hood with it. Maybe I could give it a shot.

I went over to the truck, and jammed my new weapon where the screwdriver went. The metal creaked and the hood wobbled, which is certainly a good sign. I gathered all the force I could and shoved down, causing the hood to break open from its rusted lock, a cloud of dust and rust exploded out of it.

I coughed and waved the dust particles out of my face with a smirk. I really didn't think that would work, but here I am.

Leaning forward, I looked inside to find that the engine was fucked. It was almost completely rust, despite some pieces that looked like they were in decent condition. Decent enough. I discarded the tetanus infested spear onto the ground and dove into the engine, gladly getting my fingers dirty.

I knew a surprising amount about cars. My father always loved to mess around with cars, he knew so much that there was to know, and I always stood by him, eager to learn. So I was always leaning over his shoulder, absorbing anything I could get about cars, I never thought I'd actually need that knowledge, but I guess I was proven wrong.

The spark plugs were surprisingly intact, only enough for a few days, sure. But it was surprising that they were working at all, I'd take that as a plus. Many of the other components were trash, but a few of the essential items were still holding on. It made me question how old this beast really was.

"Chloe, incoming!" Rachel was back and she had several items in her arms. Wait, what? How did Rachel find all that stuff? She dropped all the contents of her arms onto the ground beside my feet. I jumped way. "Jesus, dude. Where did you get all that?"

Rachel seemed proud of herself. She stood up straighter. "Some new addition to the place, I hope they won't be needing it soon." I chuckled at the parts discarded at my toes, this was going to make getting the truck working so much easier. I rummaged through the parts, a working battery, and some other components that I was really needing.

With a nod, I got to work. Grabbing tools and digging my face in the rusted engine, I started to repair the dead truck. Rachel watched from a distance, she didn't know nearly enough about cars as I did, so she said she was just here for morale support, and I didn't mind the company.

Man this truck was a wreck, I had to tear out completely rusted over pieces and slip new ones in, even with these new pieces, there was no guarantee this thing would even run, it would need oil, and one hell of a jumpstart, it also needed money, money that I didn't have, and didn't want to pester Rachel for. I started to think this was all a bad idea, frowning while I tried to chip off some old rust from the engine.

With all the new parts in place, I signalled Rachel for some help. The girl had been resting in a barrel behind me, downing a cigarette like it was nothing, she had lungs of fucking steel. When she got to my side, I grabbed a flat head screwdriver from the box beside me, and handed it to Rachel, handle facing her. "I need you to jumpstart this thing, just jam the screwdriver into the keyhole and twist it like you would with regular keys."

Rachel took the small tool warily, running her eyes over it before nodding, and strutting over to the door of the car, having to give it a few yanks before it actually opened. "On my signal." I called to her, and she nodded from within the car, wiping dust off of the windshield.

I leaned into the engine, making sure everything was in place before I took a step back and signalled to Rachel. "Now!" I heard the engine rumble, it tried to start, rumbling and turning over repeatedly until I held up my hand for Rachel to stop.

There was something missing, there had to be. I opened the oil tank, and surprisingly, some oil rested inside, barely much, but enough to allow the truck to run. I stuck my head in deeper and wiggled around, there was something that was causing problems, maybe it was all this damned rust.

But then I noticed something, there was a huge ball of rust clogging one of the pipes. Who knows how the fuck it got there, but it may have been the key to success. I dug into Max's toolbox until I found a pair of needle nose pliers. Rachel shuffled inside the truck, I could tell because the entire car moved with her. I placed my hand on the front to try and centre myself, then I dove in.

It was a careful procedure, especially for someone as shaky as me, but I managed to get in there, and grab the ball that was blocking the engine, I slowly wiggled it out, stupid thing, and tossed it aside carelessly. That may have been better, I wasn't entirely sure, but there was only one way to find out.

"Try again now." I called to Rachel, taking a short step back from the engine, and Rachel stuck the screwdriver into the ignition.

The truck rumbled to life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun Fact number 2: That four-legged Pictionary swan may or may not be a true story  
> (Hint: It was true)


	10. Chapter 10

"That was so awesome." Rachel exclaimed, as she held her hand in mine. I have to admit, Rachel and I fixing up that truck was amazing, our teamwork was unflinching and I probably wouldn't have been able to fix it up by myself, I was really appreciative that Rachel was there to help on that stupid escapade.

The truck didn't stay on for long, there was a lot of problems with it, but at least it could start, that was the first milestone, we could worry about the rest later. Baby steps.

After our mission was a success, Rachel and I went back to her (our?) Place and shared a victory beer, the fact that it was celebratory only made it taste better, and so did Rachel's lips on mine. "To teamwork." I lifted the beer bottle in my hand up, waiting for a cheer. Rachel laughed and took a small swig from hers before lifting her bottle up and pressing it to mine with a loud clang. I downed the rest of my beer, and so did Rachel, setting the now empty bottle beside a pile of other empty bottles.

I stared at the pile of discarded glass bottles before I opened my mouth. "Hey, how did you get all this beer, anyway?" Rachel and I were both admittedly under the legal drinking age, so it should be impossible that she got it legitimately. Did she have a fake ID or something?

Rachel didn't seem very bothered by the question, I was assuming she would, but she just leaned over and pulled out a cigarette from her pack, which was laying on the floor next to her beer mountain. Beer and cigarettes, a great combo.

"I have skills." Rachel said cryptically, lighting the cigarette at her lips.I was frustrated that I didn't get a clear answer, but I'm sure that was Rachel's intention, given the look she had on.

I huffed and let the subject drop, I knew that I wouldn't be getting an answer right away, and I wasn't getting one any time soon. Rachel knew she had won, taking a long and triumphant drag of her cigarette before handing it over to me. I took the tar stick from her, it wasn't weed, but it would do for now. I took a long drag from the cigarette, holding the smoke in my lungs for a little, relishing in how Rachel impatiently waited for her cigarette back.

Finally I opened my mouth and let the smoke slowly unfurl from my lips, then I handed the tar stick back to where Rachel sat, who immediately took a drag in. She shuffled where she was sitting, to rest against her couch, which I was sitting on. Her head rested against my thigh, and she drained her neck up to look at me. She smiled at me, and I smiled down at her.

It still felt weird to be living in Rachel's apartment, it was foreign and strange for me, and it happened so fast that I barely had time to register it. But Rachel has been so accommodating and welcoming. Honestly way more than I deserve, way more than I could ask for. I knew that her and I would have to go back and deal with the rest of my stuff later, if there was a later. I was finally glad to be settled in a real place, somewhere that was actually fit for living.

Rachel shuffled, and her head pressed farther against my leg. I smiled, and placed my hand on her head without thinking. Rachel seemed to like that idea, and she smiled under me. Slowly, my hand slipped down to her cheek, putting my wrist in an awkward situation, but I didn't care. Not when Rachel smiled under my hand, and put her own hand on my cheek. Rachel licked her lips, as much as possible under my palm, and I was transfixed by the movement, and feeling.

I welcomed the warmth of her skin, the feeling of her fingers on my face, then leaned down and kissed her.

God it was amazing, why didn't Rachel and I do it more often? The taste of her lips was a mix of tobacco and cherry lipstick that completely drove me insane. Rachel smirked under my lips, using her free hand to touch the back of my neck and pull me closer, I didn't object.

Our lip-lock lasted more time than I could count. Rachel and I got lost in each other, the taste of each other's lips, our breaths tangled together. Small mewls escaped Rachel's lips from time to time, sounds of encouragement.

I felt like this was a moment in time, a perfectly framed picture of what I wanted my life to be, gone was the shitty house, the shitty job, all the drugs, all the misery. This was all my life was, and everything it was going to be.

That was, until Rachel began to pull away from my lips, her hand snaking away from my neck and cheek. I grunted under my breath, leaning forward as Rachel pulled back to try to keep our lips together. But she was insistent, and I pulled back, placing a hand on the couch beside me to steady myself so I didn't tumble off the couch.

The most incredibly cocky (and hot) look on Rachel's face told me that her flirty teasing had only just began, and the grunting noise I had previously made got louder. Rachel chuckled at my anger, running her fingertips lightly along the blue ends of my hair. Despite being mad at her, I let her fingertips continue to explore the blue, I couldn't resist her touch, it was an all new sort of drug, a drug I wanted to be high on.

"I'm kinda hungry..." Rachel mumbled, as if she was actually thinking really hard about it, or maybe she was, I could never read her right. I frowned, but then realized that we shared something in common, I didn't have much time to eat that day. Abruptly, Rachel stood up, smoothing down her hair and feather earring. Well, I guess that hot make out session is now officially over.

With a sigh, I forced myself to my feet. "Yeah, me too." I admitted, crossing the carpet to enter Rachel's kitchen. It felt weird to be raiding it without her, as this was her place, but she insisted that I treat it as if it were my own. So when I got in, I started to ransack the cupboards. Yeah it still felt weird, but with Rachel watching over my shoulder, it was better.

I found nada in the cupboards, so I moved on to the fridge, there was shit all there, too. I sighed into the cold box, no adequate food in sight. Rachel stood just behind me, her arms crossed her her abdomen, she seemed to be in thought about something, hopefully where to eat.

Well, she seemed to have found her answer, as she let a slow smirk stretch across her face. It was a look that had my knees buckling, only a few muscles in her face had me completely falling apart. (And you know what I'm talking about, don't make it all sexual.) "Let's go out for dinner. You know? Like date number two." Rachel suggested.

Date number two? Wow, I really didn't think she wanted another, but I must have made an impression on her since she seemed excited for round two. i gave her a short nod. "Date number two? Yeah, that works." I swing my arms out of subconscious habit. "But you gotta pay." I remarked teasingly.

Rachel laughed, seeming to enjoy my fun, or she was pretending it was funny just for my sake. It was probably that. "So, date. You're on." Rachel smirked, rolling her eyes upwards in thought, probably wondering where to take me next. I leaned back against her fridge, trying to act all cool about it, but my insides were freaking out. Rachel wanted to take me on a date, another one. I thought she would have dumped me after the first one.

"Mm! I've got the perfect place." The pieces finally fell together. I stared at her, and she stared at me. No one spoke for a beat, then two. "Care to share with the class?" I finally broke the silence, interlacing my hands behind my neck and leaning back, the pressure reminded me of when Rachel rested her hand there, it was comforting.

Rachel looked tempted, but then she quickly changed her mind, taunting slightly with pure devilish mischief in her eyes. "Yeah... in a second. Let me get my jacket." She said instead, uncrossing her arms from her stomach and traversed her way to her bedroom without looking back, it left my stomach rolling. I waited a few seconds before Rachel finally came out of her room.

She was now wearing a dark green jean jacket, the British flag was on the left side of her chest, with a British curse that I didn't understand. There were a few different patches along her chest. The jacket really made her look hot, and it complimented her feathers quite a lot.

I must have been staring, because Rachel let out some sort of awkward chuckle. "Enjoying what you're seeing?" She asked, doing a 360 and letting me get a full view of the jacket and how it hugged her curves in the most complimentary way. I gulped, then mimicked the awkward noise that Rachel had made before, but this one was more awkward.

Rubbing the back of my neck to make some sort of friction, I scramble for some sort of excuse. "Yeah, just... spaced out a little." I cringed at myself, not very good at coming up with improv then, I guess I'll need to work on it if I need it later. Rachel looked amused, she saw through my lie so easily, and I shouldn't have tried, she's way too good at reading right through me.

Snatching her keys from the countertop, Rachel walked to the door and I was automatically expected to follow. Rachel didn't even have to say it to me, she knew that I would follow, because she was just that powerful.

I was on Rachel's heels while we made our way down to the parking garage. It was a dank and not very well lit place, like a setting for a drug deal you'd see in a Hollywood movie. Well, I guess we were in Hollywood, or right outside it.

"Hey, how many people get jumped, or get their weed down here?" I asked Rachel while I followed close behind her, I didn't know where she parked her car, since I haven't been in it since I moved in with her, but I trusted that Rachel knew where it was.

Rachel laughed in front of me, her laughter echoed throughout the open space. Somewhere in the distance, a car started. "Some people." She replied with a tilt of her head. She hadn't turned back to talk to me, or even looked over her shoulder, she just continued to walk and talked into the open air, knowing that I would catch what was said. "For which?" I pressed, we turned a corner and I thought I recognized her car at the end of the isle. "Getting jumped, or getting weed?"

There was a pause in her response, but not her step, we went towards the car that I thought was hers, I could confirm it was hers now. "Both." Rachel replied, pressing a button on her keychain to make the car flicker to life. I jumped at it, I forgot that cars could do that, I know my dad did that a few times, but other than that, it's not like I've had a car of my own to try it out on.

There was a teasing smirk on Rachel's face from the reaction of my fear to her car. Another button press made the car beep and all the doors unlocked. It was so unexpected that I flinched, and I could tell that Rachel was having fun, I flared my nostrils and get in the car when she did.

"What's our plan, Amber?" I asked, watching as Rachel fastened her seat belt. I originally had no plans to do so myself, but after an intentional look from Rachel, I slowly clicked the belt into place over my torso. After Rachel successfully started the car, she answered my question. "We? This is my plan, Price. You're just here for the ride."

The tone in her voice was so demanding, even if I knew it was just teasing, I stopped talking and let Rachel take me where we were going. After a few moments of silence, Rachel turned onto a main road and began to drive along it. I didn't recognize this road as much as all the others, we were going somewhere I've never been. I opened my mouth then closed it again, then repeated like a fish out of water.

I knew I wasn't going to get an actual answer, Rachel would tease me until the end of the earth, but it was worth a show, maybe I could use my charm to persuade her. "Like, where exactly are you taking me?" I carefully asked, and when she sighed, I knew I needed to quickly recover. "Like is it some sort of lunch place from our first date or-"

"You'll see in time, Chloe." Rachel wasn't going to crack, she was strong willed. But maybe if I got her in the right way, she may be able to tell me where we were going?

Time to do some back talking.

I noticed that Rachel was only driving with one hand, the other was balled up in a fist on the center console. I slowly moved my hand to where her fist was, poking at it with my fingers before I carefully started to pry open the clenched fist.

Rachel was still driving, so she couldn't just slap my hand away, she needed to focus her attention on the road. Yet she still tried to rebuttal, closing her fist again and trapping my fingers within, it kinda hurt. Rachel must have heard my whimper, because she let out an airy chuckle and kept driving.

Uh, no way I was giving up that easily. I had an advantage that Rachel lacked, my second hand. I moved them both over to Rachel's fist and started working, using one hand to carefully pry open the clenched muscles, like before. But the other one went to pestering Rachel, poking her wrist, and knuckles, trying to find a ticklish spot that would release the muscles of her fist.

I began to work feverishly, working for a ticklish spot and slowly pulling her fist open. In the driver's seat, Rachel busted out in laughing, the lighthearted sound made my chest swell. Finally I had victory, Rachel slowly opened her fist willingly, and I slipped my hand slowly in hers, securing our fingers together.

While still driving, I could tell that Rachel was looking at me from the corner of her eyes before focusing back onto the road ahead of her. Just got some bonus points.

"I'm telling you, Chloe. It's a top secret place." Rachel said, driving with one hand.

"But Rachel, I thought that my sexuality was a secret too. But I guess nothing stays that way for long..." the other girl seemed to be stumped for a moment, before she managed to recover.

"Chloe, if your sexuality was a secret, we wouldn't be going on a date right now."

I huffed, thinking of any good comebacks. "Oh, is this a date? I wouldn't know, because I have no idea what's happening." That one seemed to trip Rachel up, who paused and started working overtime to hide herself from my tricks, guess it wouldn't last long, and she knew that.

With a final burst of confidence, and flicking her signal light on, Rachel said, "I'm doing this as a treat, Chloe. Can't I surprise my girlfriend with a date?" She asked, her voice twisting into a plea that she knew I couldn't ignore.

I felt myself losing in this fight, and I didn't want to lose, I was so much stronger than that. I had to think of one last rebuttal that would win me over, but what? The time was ticking, and the more and more time I wasted, the more Rachel knew I was stumped, I had to act fast.

"I thought girlfriends told each other everything, Rachel. It's a trust thing. Don't you trust me?" Victory. I saw the way Rachel couldn't come back at me with a snide remark, she just sat there powerless, focusing on driving. Finally, she sighed. "Fine, Chloe. You win, I'll tell you where we are going."

I knew it! I was the master of Back talking, no one could beat me. I smiled at Rachel, though I knew she couldn't see me, and shuffled, resting more weight on her hand by squeezing her fingers against mine. "I was planning a picnic date, I already have the stuff in the back." Rachel jerked her head to where the trunk was, but kept her eyes forward.

A picnic date? I should have seen that, but how long had she had this in mind? Rachel talked about having everything already set up in the back, she may have had this in mind ever since our first date, then finally executed it tonight.

Suddenly I didn't want to know, I let out a sigh identical to Rachel's and looked at my lap, regretting my skill at having people do what I want them to. "Sorry, Rach." I mumbled, continuing to stare at my hand in my lap. I felt fingers squeeze against mine, and I looked up to see Rachel smiling, but her eyes were still firm on the road.

Her finger was brushing along my knuckles, a nice feeling that made me smile and tighten my sweaty grip on her hand. We were in the middle of (excuse my French) Butt-fuck nowhere, and I was hoping that Rachel had any idea of where we were.

"Where-" I began to ask, but Rachel cut me off by turning abruptly, driving down a gravel road to the middle of nowhere. This wasn't sketchy at all... I mean, I trusted Rachel, but this was kinda creepy. A gravel road in the middle of nowhere, alone while the sun was starting to set.

I looked around, we had been driving on the highway for a while, we were definitely far out of LA by now. We eventually came to a stop, a grassy field with a small hill near us. Rachel parked the car on a patch of grass, just off the side of the gravel road.

Waiting for Rachel to get out first, I sat quietly in the car, I had no idea what we were doing, and I didn't know the full plan that Rachel had in store for us. So I was going to stay still until I had directions to do otherwise.

Rachel took the keys out of the ignition and looked over at me, smiling as she untangled our hands and got out of the car. I figured that was my que and I got out afterwards. Rachel was at the truck, pulling out blankets and food, she must have really thought this through. I scrambled to help her, she seemed to have her hands full with everything, that it was the least I could do.

She gave me an encouraging smile and moved further into the grass, dropping her blanket down and smoothing it out. I slowly dropped my stuff down beside her blanket. "Here?" I asked, watching as she set up various picnic type things. Rachel nodded in return, focusing on her task.

I decided to let Rachel work on getting things set up, and I stared at the horizon instead. The sun was hidden behind hills at the end of the field, the sky above us was several different colours bleeding into each other. I had to give props to Rachel, this was a very romantic setting for a date. She must have been thinking about this.

"Hey, It's ready." Her voice snapped my eyes from the sky, to where Rachel was kneeling on the picnic blanket. I smiled at her and stepped over, sitting down on the blanket beside her. "Upset I spoiled the surprise?" Rachel asked, a sultry look on her face. I chuckled slowly and nodded along, watching as she reached in the basket to pull out two bottles of beer.

Rachel hands one to me, and put the other down. As I crack mine open, I noticed that Rachel had no intent to drink her beer, I raised my eyebrow questioningly at her with a mouthful of beer. "I'm driving Chloe. Drive responsibly."

I chuckled at the model, taking another sip of the beer and let the warm taste fill my mouth. "Just a little beer won't kill ya." I responded, after I had swallowed this mouthful of beer, good stuff. Rachel gave me a disapproving look, her finger tracing the back of my hand.

"It may not. But I want to be safe." I almost said a sex joke there, but I refrained myself and let her finish what she was saying. "And we aren't quite legal to be drinking, right?"

I huffed. I was 19, Rachel was 18. We were adults, we could make our own decisions. But the damn 21 drinking age. It was stupid, we should move to like, Canada or something, where the age is 18, Rachel and I could get smashed and party every night. What a dream...

Rachel chuckled, reaching over and grabbing one of the baskets and dug inside for food. I watched amused and took another sip of the sweet flavoured beer, letting the alcohol work at my lightweight body. Then Rachel pulled out two neatly wrapped sandwiches, that, I assumed, was dinner.

"You... have no allergies, right?" Rachel asked, holding both sandwiches in her hands. I chuckled and set the beer between my legs, squeezing my thighs together to hold the beer still. The sandwich looked like it was Egg Salad, I didn't care really. As long as it was food. "No." I responded, starting to tear into the saran wrap that was covering my prize.

Rachel laughed and copied me, except she was more careful with her approach, slowly peeling the plastic wrapping away to get to the sandwich inside. I bit into the sandwich, it was definitely egg salad, and that was great. Egg salad all the way.

I started to wolf down my sandwich, wasting no time as I devoured the home made sandwich. Rachel took her time, delicately eating the sandwich like a model would, she lived her life like everyone was watching, which is no way to live, I felt really bad for her.

I knew I was killing the romantic mood, but I was just so starving that I couldn't help myself, plus. Rachel didn't seem to mind, she found it amusing, laughing with bits of sandwich in her mouth, having to use her hand to cover her lips so food didn't spill out.

Rachel Amber was a truly beautiful girl, I was absolutely infatuated with her and I'm sure I wasn't the only one. This girl was like a magnet, and I wasn't the only one that was attracted to her either. It made me feel intimidated in a way, Rachel was way too good for me, and it was soon that she noticed that, and moved on to someone in her league.

"Chloe-" Rachel wheezed out, trying to talk between laughs and gasps for air. "Chloe, you're hilarious." She finally swallowed the sandwich in her mouth, a big smile resting on her face. I felt a blush creep up my neck onto my face. There was some sort of accomplishment in making Rachel laugh, it made me feel like I did something important that was needed of praise.

We both just smiled at each other like idiots, and I didn't want to look away, her smile was just so nice to look at, and the fact that it was directed to me? That felt amazing. Once we finished our sandwiches, the sun was much further down, our light was running out, and the stars were starting to shine.

I noticed that Rachel's shoulder had started to tremble along mine, seeing as we were touching, it was hard to ignore. She wasn't crying, was she? I looked over at the smaller girl, her whole body was trembling, and the breath in front of her was starting to vaporizing in the air in front of her face. "What's wrong?" I asked, stupidly. What if she really was crying? That wouldn't be making it any better.

Rachel continued to tremble, but looked over at me, her breaths vapourizing in my face. "Y-yeah." She stuttered. "J-just cold." The temperature was dropping from the sun setting, and there I was, sitting in a big jacket while Rachel was trembling.

"Oh." I mumbled, and quickly acted, pulling my jacket off of my shoulders. Rachel watched quietly, and I slung the thick material over Rachel's shoulders. The smaller girl smiled and cuddled into the thick jacket. "Thank you, Chloe."

I smiled again and reconnected our shoulders. "Any time, Rachel. You look great in my jacket." I wrapped my arm around her, pulling her impossibly closer to me. She didn't resist, leaning her head on my shoulder and looked at the edge of the horizon, the colours of the late sunset. We allowed ourselves to lapse into silence, we didn't need words, each other's company was enough.

I coughed, and I couldn't seem to stop. Placing my fist over my mouth and coughing what felt like bits of lung. Rachel placed a careful hand on my shoulder, "are you okay?" She asked, as I continued to cough heavily. Rachel moved her hand to my back and slowly rubbed it as I finished my coughing fit. "Yeah." I wheezed out, strained.

"Chloe. Can I ask you something?" Rachel asked. Her voice knocked me from a daze that I had gotten myself in. I looked away from the sunset to Rachel, who was still staring off in the distance, I thought that I just imagined her voice, but as a few seconds when on, I realized I hadn't. "Yeah, Rachel. Shoot."

She paused for a few minutes, her breathing was in short puffs. "Who am I?" Rachel asked finally, her head still resting on my shoulder. Did I hear that right? She asked me who she was. I opened my mouth once, and twice, trying to process the question that was posed to me. "Y... You're Rachel Amber." I responded carefully, what else was I supposed to say?

Rachel sounded frustrated, she huffed out a harsh sigh. "But who is Rachel Amber, Chloe?" She asked again, shuffling beside me on the blanket.

"Uh... You?" I responded obviously again, I had no idea what she wanted. Rachel finally looked away from the horizon, to look at me beside her. "I know, but... I feel like I'm not living my own life. I'm just an actor playing the role of Rachel Amber. I have no idea who I am."

And Rachel expected me to know who she was? We hadn't known each other for long, and we had been dating for even less. I knew that her and I were something different, yes. Our relationship was like nothing I've felt before..

"You are Rachel Amber." The girl beside me huffed, but I gave her a light and playful shove. "I'm not done yet, wait." Rachel chuckled and snuggled deeper into my jacket, letting me speak.

"You are Rachel Amber. And you are stunning, a girl that doesn't back down. You are kind, and sweet. And who is way out of my league." Rachel chuckled. "But you seem to overestimate yourself. You are just human, Rachel. You're just a girl. You can't do everything, go easy on yourself, no one will love you less if you take things easier on yourself."

The smile on her face grew even larger, Rachel grabbed my chin and brought me to her, kissing me deeply but softly. I kissed back, the taste of egg salad was still on her lips, but I didn't mind. I leaned into the kiss and absorbed any bit of Rachel I could.

We made out for a while, slowly building up intensity until both of us were out of breath. Rachel was the one to end our embrace, pulling back and sucking air into her lungs. "Thank you, Chloe." She said, and I couldn't respond. I was still trying to get an adequate amount of air in my lungs when I nodded. Rachel was too hard on herself, I really felt bad for her, on how she pushed her limits too much, she might end up hurting herself.

The sun had completely set by now, plunging the both of us into darkness. Rachel and I spent a few moments staring at the stars, the several dots in the sky, before Rachel finally broke the tension in the air. "It's late, we both have work. I'll drive us home."

While I hated to cut this short, Rachel was right, I was tired and my boss would probably kill me if I'm not at work tomorrow. Which boss? I'll find out. I stood along with Rachel and helped her clean up our mess, folding up the blanket while she got rid of the garbage and everything else.

The drive back was quiet, my hand was in hers and neither of us spoke the entire 20 minutes. Occasionally, Rachel squeezed my hand in short bursts. A gentle feeling that let me know I was safe, and that Rachel wasn't going to leave me like everyone else in my life did.

By the time Rachel and I stepped into her apartment, our lips were locked. Oxygen be damned I only needed Rachel's lips to live. We stumbled to her bedroom, too distracted by having our faces together to care about where we were stepping. When Rachel managed to get her bedroom door open, and she pinned me down on her bed, it felt like we had known each other for a lifetime. She no longer felt like a stranger, she was everything in those moments.

We kept kissing, our bodies pressed impossibly close, but not close enough. We needed to be closer. And before I knew it, our clothes were ditched on the floor.


	11. Chapter 11

I woke up around mid-morning with the sun shining in my eyes.

It took a few seconds for everything to come back, but once it did, I was suddenly aware of the very naked girl laying in bed beside me. The covers were laying over her, so all I could see was her bare shoulders and everything above.

Sitting on the bedside table was the blue earring, rachel had taken it off- as well as the rest of her clothes- last night. It was kind of weird to see her without that blue feather dangling from her earlobe. I never really asked why she wore it... I guess it didn't really matter, but I wanted to know as much about the girl that I was dating as I could.

A few minutes later, I had fully woken up, and all my senses were kicking back into place. I rolled over and checked the clock that read 10:34. Shit, did I have work today? Probably, and being late won't help my current track record. I slowly sat up and rubbed my head, shivering slightly at the feeling of the cold air hitting my bare skin.

Rachel was still asleep, so when I peeled the blankets off of me to sit on the edge of the bed, I did it carefully, to avoid waking the girl, because she looked so at peace when she slept, I didn't want to bother her by making her live in the real world.

All my clothes were scattered on the ground without a pattern so I had to scramble about to find all articles of my clothing. I grumbled to myself and looked through the room, maybe we started taking clothes off in the main apartment? I can't remember parts of last night. Only the most important part is fresh in my memory.

"Having some issues there, Sherlock?" Rachel's groggy voice nearly made me hit the roof. Then I turned to face her, she was on her side, the blanket had shifted and it was now barely covering her breasts. I tried not to look down there very long. The blonde chuckled when she caught me staring, teasingly shuffling the blanket, I grunted and stopped my search. "No."

Rachel smiled, she obviously knew I was lying, but didn't care. Stretching across the bed, Rachel brushed her fingers against my thigh. I shivered from the pure delight and sat back down on the bed, reaching over to touch the bare skin of her shoulder. Rachel beamed even more than before, leaning into my touch.

We both sat there and just touched each other for a while, loving the feeling of our bare skin on each other. Just like it was last night. Rachel reached up and brushed a chunk of hair behind my ear, a random gesture that made my chest feel warm. "Last night was... so amazing. I didn't know picnic date was your vice." Rachel glowed, moving her fingers from my hairline to cup my cheek in her palm. "Maybe it's a do over." My lips curved up at the corners. “Maybe you’re a do over.” I joked, and Rachel busted out laughing.

I smiled against her palm and pressed my face deeper into her touch. "Yes it was, wasn't it?" I agreed, tempted to lay back down and tell the world to go to hell, just lay with Rachel and forget everything about myself. But that's not how the world works, I had to get to work before I was fired. I gave Rachel one last kiss on the forehead before I stood up and went back to my search.

"You know..." Rachel started teasingly, tracing patterns with her finger along the fabric of the bed. "I figured a lot of things about you last night." She finished, as her eyes followed me around the room, I had finally started to collect my discarded clothes.

Last night was a transformation period, we became less of strangers. I felt so much closer to Rachel now, we connected on a level that normal people don't, on a way that I haven't connected with anyone before. I've definitely had sex before, I've had sex plenty of times (got my V-card punched at 15, but you didn't hear that from me) but that? That was no fling, it was real. "So did I." I respond, grabbing the last of my sewn clothes.

There was a silence for a few moments, and i couldn't see Rachel from where I was standing, I had no idea what she was doing. "Like, you figured out a lot of things about me?" Rachel finally asked, and I heard the covers shuffle to indicate that she had sit up. 

Well, yeah, I definitely did, but that's not what I meant when I said that. "No." I responded for the second time this conversation. Rachel seemed confused, as she didn't respond, she just rubbed her eyes and yawned, the moving of her body made the blanket fall further down Rachel's bare shoulders, but not quite making it past her breasts. A move that I'm sure was strategic.

"I learned some new things about you, some more intimate things." The smaller girl said, as I strapped my bra on. I looked at her over my shoulder, and gave her an award winning smile. "Do tell."

Rachel took this challenge and smiled, sitting up straight and using her hand to cover her bare chest. It was frustrating how hard she was trying, she must have loved to tease me about it. Her smirk was shit-eating. "That your stomach is... surprisingly toned. You're not that much of a beggar than I thought." Rachel paused, leaving the best for last. "And that you wear boys boxers."

I huffed. "Shut up!" Then slipped on said boxers. I liked them more than girls', they are more comfy and they cover more than girls underwear does. Putting on the rest of my clothes, I got ready to go to work. I wasn't going to like it, but I really had to go. I've missed enough this week as it is. Rachel was getting ready on the other side of me, grabbing her earring before anything else.

I really didn't want to part with her, especially not after how close her and I got after last night, but I made myself anyway. I kissed Rachel on the forehead to try to avoid giving her my morning breath, and was on my way out.

Rachel offered me a ride but I declined, I wanted to get the picture of Rachel's naked body out of my mind so it wouldn't drive me insane at work. We kissed on the lips after she had brushed her teeth (She hated my morning breath) and I was out the door before her.

The air felt cold but fresh when I stepped out of Rachel's place. The sky was a beautiful cloudless blue with the sun offering some heat from the cold breeze. It was the perfect weather for a walk. I felt perfect as I walked down to work. A few coughs here, some there. But otherwise? I was glowing on my way down, after last night I didn't know if I would ever be upset again.

It got colder as I neared the beach. It was fitting, as I was also nearing my workplace. The place wasn't very busy when I stepped inside, stomping the sand off of my boots at the door. Nathan wasn't anywhere around, and there were 2 tables that had anyone in them.

As I ventured into the kitchen, there were a few chefs in there, not anyone I was really familiar with. But I was kinda confused on where Max or Beau was, one of the two of them were always around, if the other wasn't there was well. I frowned.

However, Kate Marsh was standing in front of the staff room, her arms were crossed and she looked nervous. It was such an unnatural look for her that it made my stomach churn. As I stepped closer, she spotted me. "Chloe."

That... didn't sound good. I stopped a few feet in front of her and eyed the door behind her. She was obviously guarding it for something. And by her tone of voice, I assumed that something was me. "What's going on, Kate?" I asked carefully, licking my lips out of nervous habit. Kate fiddled with her necklace for a moment before giving me the answer to a question I didn't ask. "Can you wait out in the diner for a few minutes, Chloe?"

Yep, definitely about me. But what could they be talking about that was too bad for me to hear? Shit, did they find my weed stash? Oh man I was so fucked, this would be goodbye to the end of my job, and maybe the end of my free life. But Beau wouldn't throw me in jail from a little bit of dope, right?

I needed to get in there, and neutralize the situation before things got worse, and the scale was tipped further away from my side. I shuffled my weight and thought of a way to get inside. "I need to get in there." I said to Kate, making sure to add a stubborn lip bite because I was ready to stay here and defend myself until I could get it. I loved Kate, but she wasn't very strong willed when it came to arguments, this would be a piece of cake.

"Chloe, they are having a private conversation, I can't just let you in." Kate defended weakly. I had to give her points for trying, but she was a lover, not a fighter.

"Max tells me all about her sex life." I pause to let that sink it with Kate, but I know that it's uneventful, so Kate won't be that mortified. "So it can't be that private unless they're talking about me."

I crossed my arms as Kate looked defeated, "okay, they are. But I was told to keep you outside, Chloe. It's their decision, not yours. I'm sorry, Chloe" she wasn't done yet, but I was close. Just one more rebuttal and I may be able to persuade her to let me inside. 

"But I can help that decision if I'm in there, Kate. Without me, they may make an uninformed decision." I pointed out, adding in a frown for effect. I could see that my efforts were paying off, because Kate looked very conflicted, her guard was down and if I was any more of an asshole, I would shove her out of the way while her guard is down, but I'm not, so I won't.

After a few moments of hesitation, Kate sighed deeply. "You won't give up?" She sounded both defeated and afraid, but I had to get in there, no matter what it took. "No, Kate. I won't give up until I'm in there."

Reluctantly, Kate stepped away from the door and put her head down. I felt bad for her, I really did. "Sorry, Kate." I sighed, and reached for the handle. It sounded like she mumbled something, but I didn't quite catch it, but it didn't sound pleasant. I figured I didn't want to know, and I opened the office door.

Max and Beau looked like they were in the middle of a heated discussion when I came in. The smaller girl had her shoulders square and didn't look like she was ready to back down. And Beau, who was several feet taller than her, was looking down with his arms crossed, a look that he always wore.

"Come on, please." Max groaned, she sounded more defenseless than I knew her for. She was losing the fight. "Give her one more chance, she's good for it." It was noble for Max to defend me, but this was my battle to fight, they shouldn't have been scrapping about it behind my back. 

Neither of them seemed to notice that I was even there, so I went with the classic clearing of the throat to get their attention. Max whipped over to me, and her shoulders sank to her non hostile stance. However Beau stayed the same, with a stern scowl on his face. "Chloe, you shouldn't be in here."

"How did you get in?" Max asked at the same time Beau stated, she stepped forward. "Can you wait outside? Beau and I are almost done in here." Max's voice was always calming, and it almost eased me in this situation, but I had a feeling my job was on the line, and Max had something to do with it. She wasn't calming me any more.

"No, Max." I held my ground. I saw Beau shuffle behind Max, but he didn't say anything, yet. "Chloe, please." Max pleaded, her eyebrows were knotted and she seemed to be losing her patience.

But I was too, it was unfair that these two were handling my job and I didn't have a say in it. I was absolutely sick of always taking the back seat of my life. Ever since my father died, I was never in control of my own life, everyone else decided they would do it for me, and I was done with it. "Max, I'm not leaving this room until I get a say in what's going on.

"This is my job on the line, you two can't just whisper about my life behind my back." I felt almost out of breath when I was done, being a bit too heated about this was taking my breath away- literally. Max looked taken aback by my snapping, though I'm not sure why, she always knew me as an explosive person. Well, never towards her, anyway.

She craned her neck to look up at me, in our silence I felt a cough rise up but I held my breath and pushed it down. Beau behind us was still silent. Max filled in for him, though. "Chloe, this is a discussion between your bosses, it is none of your concern."

That was one of the only times ever that Max has ever used her boss status to suppress me and force me down. Her and I were always like family, ever since I started working there, never has she ever looked down upon me and treated me lower because of her position as she was just now.

"Actually, Max? It is my concern." I was done fucking playing, I took a step towards Max, who stepped back in turn. "You guys are fighting about my job, my income. The reason why I'm fucking alive is because of this job. It's not fair that you two are deciding my fate and forcing me into the backseat of my own life like this."

I looked over at Beau, who was still standing behind us, and hasn't said anything since the conversation began, I didn't expect him to suddenly care. When I looked back at Max she had a defensive look in her eyes. "I can't let you and him push me around, and use your rank as my boss to overmine me-"

Before I could even finish, Beau was front and centre, absolutely furious. "That is enough, Chloe!" He bellowed, instilling enough fear into me to push me back down, I wasn't feeling as tough anymore.

"You have been nothing but smug and ungrateful ever since you came here." I had never seen Beau this angry before, it scared me more than most things these days. "This workplace is no longer welcome to you, Chloe. I want to you to leave here immediately." The bigger man growled. I took a small step back, trying to distance myself from the threat right in front of me. What was Beau saying? It sounded like he was going to...

No, he wouldn't do that, would he? He's been like my family for years. Sure we've had our spats, but every father-daughter duo does, right? I couldn't let this be the end of everything, not because of just a little pot. I looked the man in the eyes, an action I regretted, because his eyes were angry, and unrelenting.

"What does that mean?" I asked, ready for him to say his worst. Beau stood up straighter (I swear I heard his back crack) and took a deep breath before saying, "you're fired."

I completely froze, every inch of my body, every ounce of my blood couldn't believe what had just happened. Fired? That can't be real. I'd been working at this diner for years, it was the only thing keeping food in my mouth, drugs in my system, a roof over my head. Sure I was just barely scraping by, but at least I was alive.

There was no way I could live without this job. Yeah, I had Rachel's place, she was nice to keep me around. How was I expected to stay around without my own income? Models made nice cash, but was it nice enough for the both of us to live healthy lives in one apartment together? I really didn't think so.

As terrible as this was for me. I was not dragging Rachel into it.

Stunned, I didn't answer for a few moments, just trying to find the words that had been scattered about. "B-Beau I-" But he wasn't done yet. I was really gonna get the beat down here, wasn't I?

"No, Chloe. You lost your chance. How much did you actually work when you were employed here?" I thought back to all the times I skipped work, just because I didn't feel like being here. "How much have you put into working here, huh?" I always half assed everything I did here, put the hard work to everyone else instead.

"How did you treat your fellow employees?" I was always an ass to Nathan, pushing him around, and I never really paid attention to the cooks, either. I used everyone here as my punching bag whenever I was feeling angsty. "And how about Max and I? How did you treat us since you got here?" I always took the two of them for granted, stepping all over them once I got the job, I was never grateful about being here.

Wow... Beau was right. I was a terrible employee, a terrible friend, a terrible person. I stepped back, weakened by the realization that I fucked this up. I fucked up every opportunity I was given, every second chance I got. I threw it out the window without a care. And I would never get that back, ever.

I looked at Max, who was defeated in the back. She wasn't going to help me now.

"You're fired, Chloe. I suggest you get going as soon as possible. You'll need the time to try and find another job." Beau grunted. And suddenly, all my sadness, my fear, turned into anger.

I knew I was fired, but Beau didn't need to be so blunt about it. He wanted me gone, didn't he? With a huff of anger, I spun around and shot out the door. I was so done with this fucking place. I was absolutely sick and tired of everyone pushing me down, of thinking so little of me because of the size of my wallet, or the way I worked.

Max was calling for me, but I didn't answer. She was a part of this. My best friend, the girl I'm closest to, the girl who's like a mother to me, just completely abandoned me. She didn't speak, she didn't try to defend me. I thought I could trust her, I thought I finally had someone to trust, but I was wrong. Rachel is the only one I trusted now.

Or was she in on this too? I wouldn't be surprised at this point, it felt like the world was against me, and I was the only person on my side. Hooo man, I really wanted to burn this place. Grab my lighter and set the whole building on fire. Then the heat of the flames would match the heat in my heart, the heat in my entire chest that kept growing and spreading and growing like a wildfire. I couldn't control it anymore.

Drugs. I needed some of my drugs. I dug my hands into my pockets and search for the emergency joints I kept hidden in them. Never knew when you needed an emergency stash because your boss and best friend kicked you on the street, you know?

Damn it, no stash in my pockets. Not even a bag, I must have run out of weed again, and I was not in the position to see Frank in that moment. I let out an annoyed sound that came from my throat, followed by a cough or two, as something felt a little caught in there.

Cigarettes. I still had a pack in my back pocket. They weren't the exact relief I needed in that moment, but they were suitable, they worked. I fished the packet out and looked inside, there were still 10 left, a decent amount to inhale and forget about my life.

I stuffed one in my mouth before even thinking, walking as I lit it and felt sweet relief as that tobacco filled my lungs. A somewhat stinging feeling followed it, but I ignored that, I just wanted to have a few minutes of stress free smoke time, and wind myself down a little bit.

The more I distanced myself from the diner, the calmer I got. But the realization sank in. I was unemployed, jobless. I wasn't proving to be of any help, not to Rachel, who was now busting her ass to sustain mine, it really wasn't fair.

So the further I got, the more dread sank a stone in my stomach. Suddenly just smoking wasn't going to cut it, I needed some company.

The old shitty phone that Rachel provided for me was barely able to text, so calling wasn't very fun, But yet, I managed to get her on the line. "Yeah?" Rachel answered with, the background sounded somewhat noisy, was she in the middle of something? It would make sense, me ruining everything.

"Hey. I need you to come meet me at the pier. I'm all by myself." I responded, I knew it was a long shot, but I couldn’t stand being by myself anymore. Rachel took a moment to respond, the noise behind her quieted so I assumed she moved somewhere more private. "Chloe, what's going on?"

"I got fired, Rachel." I admitted quietly, dreading the response I would get. Rachel was quiet for a moment, she finally said. "I'm on my way."


	12. Chapter 12

"There you are, Chloe." Rachel called from behind me. She had taken a good half hour to get here, so I just sat on the railing of the pier and had a smoke while I waited, allowing myself to sink deeper into my own thoughts. I nearly fell off the rail when she spoke. "Here I am." I responded, flicking the dead ash off if the tip of my cigarette.

Rachel slowly came to stand beside me, then carefully assessed the situation, before flinging herself on the rail beside me. "What happened?" She asked, trying to balance herself and talk to me at the same time, she looked like she was having trouble with it, until she got herself properly perched.

Didn't I already tell her? I got kicked, booted, fired. I was out of a job, out of income. I was back right where I had started when my parents left. Maybe I should just join a bank robber gang who wears animal masks. I'd fit in there. "I already told you, I got fired." I took another drag of the cigarette and grunted as the smoke tickled my throat in a strange way.

The girl beside me sighed. "I know, I know. But how, what went down in there?" I understood that Rachel just wanted to understand the situation, but it really was a kick in the nuts for me to replay the story of how I got fired because I was too much of an asshole to stay employed. I heaved a sigh and got ready to tell the whole stupid story again.

"I walked down after this morning." Took a long drag. "And when I got to work, I didn't really see anyone. So I decided to dig around until I found Kate Marsh blocking the Employees Only room." I just realized that Rachel doesn't know who Kate is, but it didn't matter right now. "After I got past her, my bosses were talking in there, well, more like they were arguing."

"They were arguing about my job, about me, behind my back. I felt betrayed, betrayed that my own friend, who's like a mother to me, was doing this behind my back. So I got mad." Rachel put her hand on my back and slowly rubbed it, which made me feel a little bit better, but not really.

Rachel coaxed me on without speaking, her hand rubbing slow and careful circles along my back. "But that's when my boss snapped, he fired me right then and there." I took a deep breath, remembering the words he had said to me, less than an hour ago. 'You lost your chance.' "He reminded me of how much of an asshole I'd been while I worked there, how bad of a person I was."

The memory still stung, and I was sure that it would be stinging for a long time to come. My only chance at making a living, at providing for myself so I can put damn food in my mouth. Wasted, because I was too in my own head to think about something for once.

The hand on my back stopped abruptly. I looked over at Rachel, who had a hard look on her face. "Chloe, you can't think like that." She scolded, brow furrowed. "That guy was an asshole for saying those things, he has no right to belittle you like that." Rachel sounded surprisingly angry. Why was she so hot headed because of my shit?

"Doesn't matter, because he was right, and-" But I didn't even get to finish. Rachel was on a roll so far, and it didn't look like she wanted to stop any time soon, either. "No, he was wrong. Chloe, in the small time we've known each other, and the smaller time we've been dating." Rachel moved her hand from my back to my hand, and gave it a gentle squeeze. "You have been one of the most open, and caring people I've run into."

I knew this speech, I've heard this speech. Rachel is just going to pull random compliments out of a hat and shower me with them. Why was I wasting my time on this, when I could be smoking up and putting today in the past?

"Chloe, something about you is magical. You flipped some kind of switch inside me, and now I can't seem to find a way to turn it off. But even if I did, I don't think I'll ever want to. There is something about you, Chloe, that just drives me mad. It fuels me with this compassion, a burning need to always be at your side, to always have you close. That guy was so wrong, Chloe."

Wow, Rachel just poured her heart out to me, a complete and genuine feeling that I've never felt ran through my body. No one has ever said those words to me, and Rachel just said them so boldly, completely lacking regret. I was not expecting any of that.

With a burst of sudden passion, I grabbed the collar of Rachel's shirt, and pulled her into me. Her tongue tasted like coffee, but her lips tasted like strawberry. A strange combo originally, but Rachel made it taste so good.

For a few moments, the two of us got lost in each other. I couldn't imagine a world without Rachel, despite having lived one for 18 years. But that whole time, my entire life up until the moment I met Rachel at the diner seemed incomplete at that point. None of it mattered.

I think that is one of the reasons I was so upset to lose that job. It was where Rachel and I first met. Where I almost spilled coffee on her and acted like a fool, because she was a pretty girl, and I had never thought about another girl that before.

Both of us pulled back for some air. Which was completely overrated compared to the feeling of Rachel's lips on mine.

"Guessing that worked." Rachel chuckled, licking her lips and making me transfixed. I rubbed the back of my neck and tried to fight off the heat that crept up to my cheeks. Rachel gave me a smile in return, and I tried to reciprocate it back, but my mouth just wasn't in the mood for smiling, so instead I just responded with a half-assed attempt at a smile.

For some reason, Rachel found that disheartening. I could tell, because Rachel wore a suddenly sad look on her face, and scooted closer to me, putting her hand on my shoulder as a comfort.

The tobacco from my cigarette stung my throat in an abnormal way, I flinched back and accidentally dropped the cigarette down into the water below, figures... "Shit." I mumbled, clutching my throat, as if that would help the pain. Rachel seemed alarmed beside me. "You okay?" She asked, rubbing my shoulder a little more intensely, I could tell it was a nervous sort of rub, not a reassuring one. I nodded and grimaced as I swallowed a pool of saliva that was in my mouth.

Rachel gave me a look that said, 'sounds fake, but okay.' However, she didn't try to fight me on it. Probably because she knew better than to engage in an argument with me. I was kind of a persistent ass.

I took a few deep breaths and the stinging started to fade. What was wrong with these cigarettes, had they gone bad or something? Could cigarettes go bad? I sighed and looked at the pack, there were a few more in there, but was it worth it, if they were just bad ones? Maybe it was only the one that was bad, the others could be fine.

Man, I'm really reaching here, aren't I?

Didn't matter, I was just fired, and I deserved these cigarettes.

What I deserved was a drink. But these would have to do, they were all I had on me. I sighed at Rachel, who still had a worried look beside me. "I just want to have a smoke and get over this whole thing, okay?" I asked, grabbing another cigarette from the pack and stuck it between my lips.

Rachel nodded, her expression eased. "Yea, I'm alright with that." Rachel leaned in closer, a teasing smile on her face. "As long as I get one too." I really couldn't resist Rachel when she was flirtatious, she had this aura that was absolutely undeniable, it switched my brain off, and I nodded numbly.

Handing a cigarette to Rachel, I lit it before lighting my own. Her cigarette seemed to be fine, as Rachel didn't recoil or show any signs of pain when inhaling, she just pulled in a large amount of smoke, and slowly let it leave her mouth, before forging the rest of it out in a thin stream. I gulped before sucking on mine.

The sun in front of us was shining brightly, it's warmth helping us fend off the cool breeze of this January afternoon. Rachel smoked in silence, enjoying each other's company, rather than words.

After what felt like an hour, but neither of us had finished our cigarettes yet, Rachel blew out a puff of smoke and asked. "So, what now?" It took me a few seconds to register that the question was pointed towards me, why wouldn't it? I'm the only other person here. "Huh?" I asked, flicking the dead ash off the end of my cigarette.

"What are you going to do now? How can you get another job, and where?" Rachel asked, it didn't sound like there was a point to her question, she was just asking it because it was on the table. I sighed, "no idea, Rachel. I'll figure it out."

Rachel shuffled her weight over towards me, still balanced on the rail. "When?" She asked, almost impatiently. I didn't understand where this was coming from, was she trying to rub it in? Rachel would do that, what is this all about?

"I-" Before I could even say anything, my throat felt all blocked up with mucus, I had to clear it real hard to get the damn thing even a little bit open, was I getting sick? What a wonderful thing to add to my ever growing list of problems. When I finally got my breath back, I answered. "I don't know Rachel, it just happened, I just need time."

Rachel seemed unsatisfied with the answer I gave, she harshly flicked the ash off her cigarette and frowned at me. "You can't dwell on it, Chloe. The longer you wait, the harder it will be to get back into the game, act sooner rather than later."

It took all of my self control not to snap at Rachel. I knew that shit already, and I knew she was just trying to help. But it just happened today, not even 3 hours ago, I needed time to get my bearings before I tried again, why was she rushing me? "I will, thanks." I responded halfheartedly, then took in a monstrous drag of my cigarette, nearly destroying the entire thing, and blew all the smoke out of my nose. My vision was temporarily impaired as the smoke floated up and covered my eyes.

Rachel knew not to press further, and she kept quiet. Sucking up the rest of her cigarette within 10 minutes. I finished mine not far after that.

I know I said only one smoke, but I still felt wound up, and there were still more cigarettes in the pack I had. I looked over at Rachel, who looked over at me, then I flicked my eyes between her, and the packet, then back again. Rachel followed my eyes, then it clicked in her mind, and she nodded. "I'm down for another if you are."

And that's how one smoke became two, and two became three, and three became four. Eventually, Rachel and I had to grab her fresh packet, and crack that one open. The sun fell, and the stars came out, but it's not like we could have seen them with the lights of the pier around us. And the entire city of Los Angeles drowning out the night.

But that was okay, we didn't need to see the stars to know they were still there. Just the idea that they were out there shining, like they did night after night was comforting enough.

The moon shone on the waves, creating a white rippling beam on the water's surface by the pier. We couldn't see the water as easily, as Rachel and I had moved off the railing to sit on a picnic table beside it, (Which was a lot better on our butts) but the light still reflected off the water and illuminated half of us, while the other half was illuminated by the bright and cheery lights of the pier.

Rachel returned back to our posted base at the picnic table with food. Two subs in her right hand, and cotton candy in the other. I chuckled at her when she dropped the goodies down onto the table. "Thought we could use a smoke break." She commented, before sliding back into her side of the table.

I definitely didn't complain. Instead, I reached forward and grabbed a sub, quickly unwrapping it and discovering the beautiful smell of marinara sauce. It was a meatball sub, thank god. Sparing nothing, I quickly tore into the sub with my teeth, completely disregarding the mess it would make. Rachel chuckled amusingly and watched me tear into my sub like a savage, where she carefully took the wrapping off, and ate her prize slowly. It reminded me of last night, when the exact same thing happened, except with picnic sandwiches.

The sub had no chance, it was demolished in minutes, and my stomach felt satisfied. I wiped all the sauce off my mouth with a nearby napkin, and watched as Rachel ate only half of her meatball sub, and the other half was sitting uneaten right in front of her.

"Are you going to finish that?" I asked timidly, eyeing the sub in front of her. Rachel had moved on from her sub and had started to pick at her cotton candy instead. She smirked knowingly and slid the sub over towards me, I smiled happily and dug into it for her. 

She looked amused in watching me rip apart the half eaten sub, no one should ever be this happy to see someone else tear this apart like an animal, but Rachel was really someone special.

In the middle of my snarled eating, Rachel suddenly had a sober look on her face. I gulped the bite that was in my mouth and tilted my head at her. The girl in front of me looked hesitant in voicing herself, but eventually made up her mind.

"Do you regret last night?" She asked quietly, as if she was ashamed of the question. For a moment, I was confused. What about last night? So many things happened that it was hard to pinpoint exactly what she was talking about. But then I had a guess. "Like... What happened at your place?

Rachel bit her lip and nodded. I absolutely didn't regret it, but did she? It seems fair to assume that, since only people who regretted it themselves are worried that others did, too. "I absolutely don't regret what we did. Sure it was maybe a little soon, as we met not very long ago, but the feelings were real, Rachel."

I could remember the feel of her bare skin on my hand, against my own, just like it was an hour ago. I had to shake the thoughts from my mind, they weren't the point of this conversation. Rachel nodded, she seemed  a little more at ease about herself, so maybe it was just a question of whether or not I agreed with her on it, but that was ridiculous, because, of course I did. But I didn't want to pry, and Rachel seemed to be relaxed now, so I continued to eat the sub in my hands.

After I made the sub in front of me disappear, I leaned my head back and looked at the sky. All the light pollution made any features up there look invisible, instead, it just looked like a black void, it looked like nothing and everything all at once. That, or my brain was starting to get dizzy by how out of breath I was just eating.

Was I really that out of shape? I guess I needed to work myself out a little more.

When I looked back down, Rachel was on her phone, typing angrily at the screen. It kinda made my heart sink a little, we were having a good time together, but now she's all busy with her phone. "Hey Rach." I tried to talk to her, but she barely noticed, too entrapped by her phone and whatever business she had going on to notice me. I waved my hand at her, trying at a second attempt to have her snap out of it, but, useless.

I sighed, was this night really going to be ruined by a damn phone? Unbelievable, I had to fix this. Sticking another cigarette in my mouth and lighting it, I tried to brainstorm an idea that would get Rachel's attention off her phone. I could offer a cigarette, but she could smoke that and text at the same time. I couldn't try to scare her off her phone, because that's way too mean, even for me. I was sucking on my cigarette when the perfect opportunity stepped forth, slow music started to spill out of the pier's speakers, and a smirk rolled onto my face.

Rachel wasn't paying attention, even when I shot to my feet, and assumed a dancing position. "Dance with me." I said. Rachel made a noise at her phone, I was assuming that it was directed towards me, because it was more amused. That was a start at least. Now I really needed her attention, I used the music to my advantage and began to dance, silly movement and weird gestures, anything to call her attention over.

Finally, it worked, and Rachel looked up from her phone, and laughed as she watched me being an idiot. I definitely felt like an idiot, but the fact that it was making Rachel feel better was a plus for me. I continued the weird dancing and encouraged her to dance along, but she just laughed harder and shook her head. 

This was really making me feel out of breath, whoo. From not much dancing, I already felt lightheaded, and I couldn't seem to recover my breath, but I pressed on anyway, my plan was working.

"Come on!" I called again, making more crazy flailing gestures in attempt to make myself look like a total fool, and it worked, Rachel kept laughing, even as she rose to her feet. I made a point of acting like a goof as I waltzed over to her carelessly. The girl continued to laugh and sputter when I grabbed her hand.

With a gentle jerk, I pulled the blonde into me, and smiled when she laughed against my collarbone. The slow, but cheery music played around us, and I swayed Rachel against me to it's beat. I hugged Rachel close, and she held me in return, not letting me go by snaking her arms around my waist.

I jumped around on my feet, feeling happy, and cheery, and out of breath. But that didn't matter, who needed air when I had Rachel Amber to breathe in anyway? I rested my chin on top of her head and still held her close, swinging and dancing at a gentle pace as to not startle Rachel too much. I made a careful attempt not to light rachel's hair on fire with my cigarette.

My lungs felt on fire, my chest ached so hard, it demanded the attention I wasn't giving it. Sharply, I let go of Rachel and pushed myself back, heaving my lungs and trying to get the air I needed.

Confused, Rachel looked at me funny, but I couldn't see her well from all of the spots. my vision was dancing, and I was feeling light headed... I gasped to try and catch my lungs up, to get the air I needed, but I couldn't, something was in the way. Something was blocking my windpipe.

I couldn't breathe.

"Hey, what's wrong?" Rachel asked worriedly, slowly making her way over to where I was bent over wheezing. I tried to respond, I tried to do anything, but I couldn't. I couldn't do anything and I felt so weak because of it.

My poor attempts at breathing were continuing and Rachel didn't look any better, she bit her lip and her brow was furrowed, I could see a look of fear in her eyes. I didn't want her to be scared. I opened my mouth once and twice to try to talk to her, but it was no use, I couldn't breathe. I wanted to tell her not to be scared, that I was fine, but I couldn't.

What was even happening? I mean, yeah I know I have smoker's lungs, but it never got to the point where I couldn't breathe even when standing still, and I've never felt like my throat was clogged like it was now.

"Chloe, Chloe, hey. Do you need me to call an ambulance?" Rachel's voice was pure panic at this point, it matched my body and how everything was freaking out and shutting down. I wanted to stay awake, but so little air was getting in, everything was getting black... I didn't want to be weak, to let someone else do my work for me, but I didn't have a choice, I nodded.

Rachel went off to the side and started talking into her phone in a panic, I could barely hear what she said, but I could pick out a few words. "My girlfriend... breathe, she... t-e p-er. H-lp." I fell to my knees suddenly, any other power to stay up, any other power source in my body shut down and focused everything on breathing.

Before I knew it, Rachel was at my side again, her hand on my shoulder and never letting go, even when the ambulance pulled in, and I laid limp as all the doctors and medics moved me around like a rag doll because I couldn't move anymore, I couldn't see, I couldn't feel, everything was fading.

Rachel tried to fight to get a spot in the Ambulance, but the parimetics wouldn't let her. And...

A  n  d... .  .    .    .


	13. Chapter 13

I felt like I was out for ages, everything  was dark and I felt like I was sucked into a deep pit of darkness. When I came to, I was laying in a hospital bed, everything was blurry, and my throat was sore, It ached to the touch, and I coughed to try and shake the feeling.

Someone shuffled beside me, someone I didn't know was there. It almost gave me a heart attack, and I jumped, only to be stopped by a mess of entangled tubes and wires. I blinked rapidly to try and make sense of the situation around me, and before I knew it, Rachel Amber was sitting above me, her face in mine.

"Chloe!" She shouted, her voice seemed a little blurred and out of focus, but I think that was just my body trying to pull itself from sleep. "You're awake, oh you're awake." She sounded so relieved, pushing her body down on mine and trying to wrap me in an awkward hug.

I tried to hug her back, completely confused of what was happening. How did I get here? What happened? Last thing I remember was being at the pier with Rachel, and I couldn't catch my breath, then I couldn't breathe...

Wait, wait. Rachel called an Ambulance, I remembered being pushed inside and Rachel wasn't allowed in, and that's when I blacked out. 

Trying to talk to Rachel, I opened and closed my mouth like a blubbering fish out of water. I couldn't bring myself to words, my throat throbbed so bad even without speaking, I could only imagine what actually talking would feel like. But despite that, I still tried, and Rachel looked at me worriedly while I did.

"R-Rachel.." I wheezed out, and pain shot through my throat so hard I jumped then started to cough. It hurt to cough, but I couldn't stop. "Take it easy, Chloe." Rachel soothed, putting her hand on my hairline and slowly smoothing the strawberry blonde locks back, it felt very calming, and I tried to focus on that feeling rather than the pain that was wracking my throat.

I started to breathe through my nose and calm myself down, it was no use being stressed out in a situation like this, I needed to gather my bearings before I tried to find out what happened. I closed my eyes for a few seconds to recentre myself, before inquiring any further.

But I didn't know what to say. I knew where I was, I knew why I was there, what else was there for me to say? I needed a better vantage, so I slid onto my elbows, and slowly raised myself upwards, grunting mildly in the process.

The last thing I expected was for the room to have other people in it, but, it did. Beau was there, of all people. He looked at me curiously, but didn't leave his spot. I refused to look him in the eye. Kate was there too, she sat in the corner, her eyes closed as if she was sleeping, but I wasn't sure if she was or not. Wait, if Kate was there, it had to mean...

Max was the only one MIA. But why? If Kate was here, shouldn't Max be here? You'll never see Kate, if Max isn't within 20 feet of her, it's a rule you could bet money on. But Max wasn't here, my best friend wasn't in my hospital room. That really stung.

I let out a long, mutilated noise and rested my head back on the pillow, the harsh light from above was stating to dull, my vision returning to normal, and everything else felt coming back as well, the faded noise in my ears was evaporating.

Rachel must have seen the sink in my shoulders, because she pulled me into another embrace. "It's okay, don't worry. You're fine now."  But I wasn't because I was too much of an asshole for my own friend to even show up, I'd ruined it with her, just because of something that wasn't even her fault. How selfish was I?

"How... What happened?" I asked, my throat starting to throb a little less. Nonetheless, I still placed my hand over the sore skin in an attempt to heal it, which made no sense, but what else was I going to do? Rachel smoothed my hair back again, and I let her, closing my eyes at the feeling.

"All the cigarettes had built up a layer of tar in your throat slowly, and it got so bad after yesterday that..." Rachel trailed off, but I didn't need her to continue, I could figure the rest out on my own. Suddenly, Beau rose to his feet from where he was sitting. The grown man slowly made his way to the bed where Rachel and I were, none of us said a word.

For a moment, I didn't talk, and neither did he, we just stared at each other in a dull quietness. Finally, Beau cleared his throat. "Chloe. I... I'm sorry for the things I said to you." He did a half assed apology. I was very close to just spitting in his face and ignoring him, but I had to be better than that, I was the asshole too. I simply nodded, trying to avoid his gaze because I really didn't want to look him in the eye.

Finally, Beau gave up trying and sighed. "Max will be back in 10 minutes." Wait, Max was here? Where? I fought through a mucous filled throat to ask, "she's here?" Beau turned and looked at me for a moment, as if he didn't know if I said that or not, but I looked back at him expectantly. "Yes, she just had to do a check up on someone else, then she will be back, we didn't expect you to wake up this early."

Someone else? Why was Max visiting someone else in the hospital? last time I checked, she hadn't told me that anyone she'd known was in the hospital. I frowned, looking away from Beau to signal being done in conversation, luckily he took the hint and backed down.

Rachel wouldn't let go of me, and I actually liked that. She was comforting and I didn't want her to let me go, ever. "You have to stay until tomorrow, the doctors have to make sure that your throat is clear enough before you leave." I sighed, then felt my throat again, the skin was lumpy, almost like a scar, but it shouldn't be, it can't of healed that quickly.

"They had to do some, uh... sewing." Rachel brushed her fingers along the bandage underneath my fingers and I flinched. "Sorry." She mumbled apologetically, and moved her curious fingers elsewhere. So they cut my throat? I cringed at even the thought of that, I didn't want to imagine what that would have felt like to have my throat sliced open.

I gulped my saliva down, and flinched again. How long was it going to hurt like this? I looked over at Rachel, and the heavy concerned look on her face was making me feel sad. This was my problem and I didn't want Rachel to be upset about it, so I decided to lighten the mood. "So I'm guessing that means no smoking for a while?" I asked, with as much of a smile as I could on my face.

It didn't seem to help that much, but it did relieve the slight tension between her brows, and she eased up against my side. I leaned myself into her, resting my head against her shoulder and closing my eyes peacefully. We both stayed in silence for a long time.

After a long drag of silence, the hospital door opened, and Max came into the room. I sat up, and suddenly I felt better, because finally, my best friend was in my hospital room, she cared for me, and was here when I needed it. But when Max looked over at me, she had pure concern on her face. I lifted myself onto my elbows, then onto my butt when seeing her face.

"What's... wrong?" I muttered, still getting used to how it stung to even just talk. Max sighed and made her way over to where I was on the bed. She grabbed a chair and started to drag it over, but she gave me a questioning look, as if she was asking permission to bring the chair up. I nodded encouragingly, it kind of stung that she even had to ask to bring the chair over.

Max sat down in a chair beside me, on the opposite side of rachel, and put her hand on mine. "I was visiting Nathan Prescott." Oh... That punk? The hell was he doing in a hospital? Probably got beat up by some guy because he was whining about how his daddy would beat everyone up for him. I huffed and closed my eyes, I didn't really care about what Nathan was going through, I almost died.

Beau seemed interested, he sat up from his chair and looked at Max. "What was going on with Nathan?" He asked, putting the newspaper he had in his hand. Was it still night? Or was I out for that long? Whatever, didn't matter right now. Nathan was also in the hospital and Max seemed very worried because of it.

"His father put him in here, it was his father that was giving him all those bruises." Max said quietly, her lips curved downward into a sad frown. No way, Nathan's dad, the one who he always threatened to everyone about, the one who he always hid behind, was beating him? That seemed so impossible, like a lie. It was so hard to understand.

Then I realized how much of a dick I had been to Nathan, how I always called him out, and assumed things of him when he didn't deserve it, when he was going through so much at home already, he didn't need me mocking him behind his back. I didn't need to feel any worse about myself than I already did.

Man I was a douche.

"Oh." Was all I could say, both physically, and emotionally. It was so unexpected for Mr. Prescott to be a corrupt father. He was a fucked up businessman, so I should have seen it coming. Max must have seen how guilty I looked, because she rubbed my left arm, while Rachel rubbed my right, they looked at each other in the eye, and nodded slightly. They must have met while I was out.

"Don't worry, Chloe. No one saw it coming." Max thought that was comforting but it really wasn't. That didn't stop me from being an ass, and making his life worse. This guilt was burning a hole in my chest even more than a hole was being burnt in my throat.

I gave a simple nod, not wanting this conversation to drag on any longer than it had to. Max smiled back down at me, the worry from moments ago was gone. "I'm glad you're okay, Chloe. You really freaked me out."

I freaked myself out too, the whole thing was so sudden that I didn't really have time to react before I was dying on the ground. But wait a second, how did Max know I was here? It's not like I could have contacted her, and rachel didn't even know her number. And how did Beau get here too? I scrunch my eyebrows together. "How did you know I was here?" I asked quietly, gulping and letting myself get used to the stinging feeling.

Max chuckled. "Because I'm your emergency contact, they call me when you get hospitalized." Oh, well that made a lot of sense. Rachel chuckled and leaned herself on me, I returned the favour by leaning on her too. I looked at her, and our noses were just barely apart, she smiled at me, and I smiled at her.

Before I knew it, Kate had woken up too, and now everyone was awake and surrounding my bed. It felt so warm and comforting that these people cared so much about me to be here with me in my hospital bed. I was thankful for every single one of them.

Rachel left for a while, and came back with inappropriate card games and some food. We set up shop over my hospital bed, and played card games and ate sugary foods all through the day. In those moments, I felt more happy than I ever had in my life, surrounded with the people that I cared about, and the people who cared about me.


	14. Chapter 14

By 11am the next morning, my hospital room started to thin out. Beau left to talk to Nathan, then open up the shop. Max and Kate stayed to visit for an hour before Max had to go to work, and Kate followed her out.

"Are you sure you don't want me to stay?" Max asked, after I noted that her normal shift hours were going to start. I appreciated her willingness to stay with me, but I looked over at my sleeping Rachel, who was still passed out despite it being quite late in the morning. "Go, Max. You have work to do. I'll be okay here." Part of my, the selfish part, wanted her to stay with me, and not leave my side until I left the hospital, but I knew how to control that side.

Max seemed a little reluctant, but she finally caved. Giving my hair a gentle brush to the side, Max took Kate's hand and slowly left the hospital room, lingering as any parent who was unhappy to be leaving their child would. "Oh my god, Mom. I'll be fine." I exclaimed in a joking manner, watching as she was only half way out the door. The brunette seemed to be surprised for a second, before that demeanor fell, and she stuck her tongue out at me.

I laughed deeply, which stung my throat a little, but I didn't care. I was too busy having fun to let my stupid throat stop me. Rachel stirred in her sleep beside me, letting me know that I was being a little too loud, and Max's gaze followed mine to Rachel. She smiled softly at the girl, then looked back at me, the kind look on her face. Then she left, along with Kate. 

All this hospital shit was making me hungry, I layed back in my bed with a grunt, placing my hand on my stomach dramatically. Rachel watched with a laugh. "Hungry?" I huffed my response, wiggling around in the hospital bed they put me in.

"Alright, I'll get us some breakfast." Rachel patted my leg and stood, shivering slightly then putting her jacket on, "I'll only be a second." she reassured, "what do you want?" It was nice of Rachel to get breakfast for us, I gave her a small smile. "Anything works, really."

I felt like Rachel was treating me like a baby, making me stay bedridden while she went and got the food for me. I sat up, balancing myself on my elbows to stay upright. "You know, I can come with you, help you carry."

Rachel smiled at my offer, but then she was insistent. "No, you stay and rest, I've got this." I gave her a look, which Rachel reciprocated. Then I chuckled lightheartedly. "It's not like I broke my legs, Rachel. I can walk down with you."

The model walked closer to me, sitting beside me on the bed and kissing my cheek softly. "I know, but you're not doing well and I want you to rest. I've got this." Rachel seemed like she wasn't going to change her mind, and I didn't want to argue with her, so I nodded in defeat, and cherished how Rachel kissed my cheek on the way out.

Everything fell silent when Rachel left, all sounds except for the steady beep of the heart monitor beside me had left when Rachel did. I looked down at my hands in my lap, and toyed at my finger with the attachment on it. For a moment I thought about tinkering with it, but that would cause it to flatline, and everyone would panic. So I decided it was best to not touch the important hospital stuff.

Rachel returned after about 10 minutes with bowls of cereal in hand. They were Cheerios, my favourite, besides Froot Loops. I smiled and reached out to grab my bowl. Rachel, caught off guard, jumped before she knew what was going on, and almost spilled the milk out of the bowl.

She laughed, and so did I. "So impatient..." Rachel sighed jokingly, then handed the bowl and spoon over to me, who devoured it immediately. Rachel smiled at me and slowly took a spoonful of her cereal.

"This is gross." I grunted, eating my stale hospital food. Rachel made a noise of agreement and continued to eat her cereal as well, clearly not enjoying it. When I finished the food, I set the bowl down and pushed it away. "Blegch, never again."

Rachel swallowed down the last of her cheerios (with a distinct lack of cheer) and set hers down roughly, to the point where it tipped over. "Now I know why everyone hates the food here." She commented, wiping access milk off her lips and scooting closer to me on the bed. I smiled when she rested her shoulder against mine, and pressed a gentle kiss against her eyelid. "When are we out of here, Capt'n?" 

The blonde beside me smiled, her eyes still closed. "We just have to wait until someone comes to check on you, make sure you're fine, then we are out of here." I nodded slowly, that would probably be a while, since there are people in this hospital who needed more attention than me. People who were actually dying.

"So what now?" I asked, shuffling in the bed to make myself comfortable, Rachel was caught off guard and opened her eyes suddenly, getting used to the new shift. After she realized what happened, she returned to her calmer manor, slumping against my shoulder. "We can watch a movie, or something." I looked over at the dinky old TV that was in the hospital room. It wasn't very big, but it could serve some purpose. "Yeah, that doesn't sound so bad." I agreed, looking for a remote.

After a considerable amount of time fighting over what to watch, Rachel and I settled on some movie about lesbians. I couldn't really understand it, either because I was too stupid, or because it was in a different language. Rachel had to put on subtitles part way through.

"Who the hell can put two of someone else's fingers all the way into your mouth, without gagging or puking?" I commented, once we were almost done the 3 hour movie. Rachel chuckled quietly at the question, and didn't respond, but instead, was enriched in the scene that was on the television.

Definitely not going to lie, the movie had turned me on more than once. Weeks ago I would have been terrified to admit that, even to myself. But now, with my girlfriend beside me, I wasn't really ashamed anymore.

After the movie ended, Rachel and I spent some time quietly on my hospital bed, just enjoying each other's company, breathing each other in. Then a nurse came in to for a check up. She didn't at all seem remorseful, or worried. She gave me a disappointed look, and did the checks as if reluctantly. But I knew I deserved it. I was just some punk kid who had did too much smoking. I didn't deserve any sympathy, I did this to myself.

Eventually, I was approved, and I slipped into the bathroom to change into some clothes that Rachel had brought last night. It felt great to get out of my hospital gown, but I still felt gross and weird, and I definitely smelled like hospital. I would need to shower when I got back home.

"Let's hit it." Rachel smiled once I left the bathroom, fully clothed and ready to get the hell out of there. I laced my arm with Rachel's, and she gave me a smile that would melt my damn heart, as if it wasn't already this fucked. At the front office I discharged myself, and the doctors gave me meds to help with any problems I would be having for the first few months. And obviously, I was told to stop smoking, which bummed me out. But I didn't think I'd listen to that advice, anyway.

Once Rachel and I left, we got in her car, and started to head back to her place. But somehow, I'm not sure if it was her decision or not, but we ended up on the beach, instead. I didn't really question it, because the smell of the ocean, the smell of the water was calming enough not to want to leave.

We ditched our shoes and walked onto the cold sand, I dug my toes in and took a deep breath of everything, the smell, the sand, everything in the air. Rachel's arm snaked around my waist and slowly pulled me closer to her, I let it happen, and pulled her closer to me, in turn.

After a long time, I broke the silence. "I've always loved the beach." Was the only thing I said, breaking the silence of only the waves crashing on the shore. Rachel nodded at my side. "Did you go here with your dad?" She asked, quietly. The question stung, but she had every right to ask it, I gave her a sound of agreement, and she pulled me closer, as if subconsciously.

"He would always take me here when I was feeling sad, or upset with something. Or even as a reward, when I passed in my school classes." I had the very sudden urge to smoke, and I almost did, as an impulse. But I stopped myself with my hand in my pocket, reaching for the packet. "I didn't have memories like that with my dad." Rachel piped in, scuffing the sand with her foot. "I mean, we went on a few family trips a few times, and they were nice, but..." Rachel stopped herself.

I looked away from the lapping water and down at the girl on my side. She looked back up at me, and the look on her face... the look... I couldn't help myself before I touched her chin and pressed my lips to hers, in a tender kiss that she returned. For a few moments, I knew nothing but the taste of Rachel's lips. But then we pulled away for air. "You and I will have memories like that, Rachel."

And I never doubted it

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that's all she wrote (She, being me) Thank you all for reading, and this is the first story I've written to completion. I want to thank my friends Xavier and Christian for being so supportive, and giving this story a proofread before I sent it out, I owe it all to those guys


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